Salon.com > Twilight http://www.salon.com Sat, 18 May 2013 15:00:00 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 Stephenie Meyer says “traditional romance” books are “too smutty” http://www.salon.com/2013/03/11/stephenie_meyer_says_traditional_romance_books_are_too_smutty/ http://www.salon.com/2013/03/11/stephenie_meyer_says_traditional_romance_books_are_too_smutty/#comments Mon, 11 Mar 2013 19:45:00 +0000 http://www.railrode.net/?p=13225440 "Twilight" author Stephenie Meyer may have spawned a culture of mommy porn and a subculture of vampire fetishism with her trilogy about Bella Swan and vampire lover Edward Cullen, but that was never her intention. The Mormon mother of three told the Guardian's Kira Cochrane recently that she has not read E.L. James' erotic "Twilight" fan-fiction,"Fifty Shades of Grey" -- or even most romance books -- because they are "too smutty":

"When I ask Meyer whether she's read Fifty Shades, she quickly, emphatically, says no. She doesn't wish James ill at all, she says, but 'it's so not my genre. Erotica is not something I read. I don't even read traditional romance.' Why not? 'It's too smutty. There's a reason my books have a lot of innocence. That's the sort of world I live in.' "

Her own "less-traditional" romance has been just as polarizing, though, with detractors labeling it as "abstinence porn." (Meyer was taken aback by the "the massive amount of fans that I hadn't expected, and the massive amount of people who hated it, which I also didn't expect.") She insists, however, that "Twilight" is about "true love":

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2013/03/11/stephenie_meyer_says_traditional_romance_books_are_too_smutty/feed/ 8 Fifty shades of … beige? http://www.salon.com/2013/02/27/fifty_shades_of_beige/ http://www.salon.com/2013/02/27/fifty_shades_of_beige/#comments Wed, 27 Feb 2013 16:12:00 +0000 http://www.origin.railrode.net/?p=13213389 At Vanity Fair's famous Oscar party Sunday night, the New York Post was eager to find out from Fifty Shades of Grey” author E .L. James — the writer now famous for her "Twilight" fan-fic bodice whipper, I mean, ripper  —  who is being cast in the film adaptation of her internationally best-selling BDSM romance series. She told them, "We don’t even have a filmmaker … so we are still a long way away from casting. I have some ideas  … but it may not be who people expect.” She also told the Post that she's toning down the sex for her next book. "It won’t be nearly so raunchy — and I will probably write it under another name,” she said. The trilogy, the first novel of which was initially self-published as an e-book titled "Master of the Universe," and later repackaged as both an e-book and a trade paperback as "Fifty Shades of Grey" by Vintage Books, has sold over 65 million copies around the world, in over 37 countries, and was chosen book of the year by the public in the National Book Awards back in December.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2013/02/27/fifty_shades_of_beige/feed/ 3 Razzies name “Twilight” finale last year’s worst picture http://www.salon.com/2013/02/24/razzies_name_twilight_finale_last_years_worst_picture/ http://www.salon.com/2013/02/24/razzies_name_twilight_finale_last_years_worst_picture/#comments Sun, 24 Feb 2013 14:15:00 +0000 http://www.origin.railrode.net/?p=13210410 LOS ANGELES (AP) -- The "Twilight" team finally has earned some love - or loathing - from Team Razzies.

"The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2" was picked as last year's worst picture Saturday by the Razzies, an Academy Awards spoof that hands out prizes for Hollywood's lousiest movies on the eve of the Oscars.

The finale to the blockbuster supernatural romance dominated the Razzies with seven awards, including worst actress for Kristen Stewart, supporting actor for Taylor Lautner, director for Bill Condon and worst screen couple for Lautner and child co-star Mackenzie Foy.

Adam Sandler was named worst actor for the raunchy comedy "That's My Boy," his second-straight win after 2011's "Jack and Jill," which swept all 10 Razzie categories a year ago. Pop singer Rihanna won worst supporting actress for the action dud "Battleship."

"Twilight" movies had been well represented in Razzie nominations over the years but had not won any key awards there. Razzie voters joke that as with "The Lord of the Rings" finale winning best picture at the Academy Awards, they were waiting for the last "Twilight" flick on which to heap their scorn.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2013/02/24/razzies_name_twilight_finale_last_years_worst_picture/feed/ 4 “Beautiful Creatures”: A left-secular answer to “Twilight”? http://www.salon.com/2013/02/13/beautiful_creatures_a_left_secular_answer_to_twilight/ http://www.salon.com/2013/02/13/beautiful_creatures_a_left_secular_answer_to_twilight/#comments Wed, 13 Feb 2013 20:45:00 +0000 http://www.origin.railrode.net/?p=13200327 I greatly enjoyed the camped-up teen angst of “Beautiful Creatures,” but I also suspect it might be analogous to those children’s books that are not so secretly meant for grown-ups. (My kids, for example, find the irony of the Lemony Snicket books impenetrable, and the adventures overly dark.) Adapted by writer-director Richard LaGravenese from a young-adult bestseller by Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl, “Beautiful Creatures” plays like a funnier, edgier, Southern-gothic knockoff of the “Twilight” universe, with a distinct liberal-secular sensibility and without the virginal sexuality, po-faced seriousness or undertones of Christianity.

Precisely those factors – along with the fact that the movie’s real stars are Jeremy Irons and Emma Thompson, in scenery-chewing supporting roles – may well reduce its appeal to teenage girls, who presumably crave the ultra-earnest romantic intensity of the Twi-verse. I’d love to be proven wrong on that forecast, but for now I’ll just insist that “Beautiful Creatures” is surprisingly fun, and deserves much more of a look from adult viewers than it’s likely to get. LaGravenese, a Hollywood veteran with a wobbly but intriguing résumé that goes clear back to his Oscar-nominated screenplay for “The Fisher King” in 1991, has wrestled considerable humor, emotion and atmosphere from this pulpy and derivative material.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2013/02/13/beautiful_creatures_a_left_secular_answer_to_twilight/feed/ 1 “Warm Bodies”: Love with an emo zombie http://www.salon.com/2013/02/01/warm_bodies_love_with_an_emo_zombie/ http://www.salon.com/2013/02/01/warm_bodies_love_with_an_emo_zombie/#comments Fri, 01 Feb 2013 19:28:00 +0000 http://www.origin.railrode.net/?p=13188286 “Warm Bodies” sounds a lot better in theory than it turns out to be in practice. Of course, that’s true of about 90 percent of Hollywood movies, and let’s pause for a second to reflect that the original concept here involves a retelling of “Romeo and Juliet,” with zombies. So to say that the movie is not quite as good as its mind-blowingly moronic premise is not praise. At any rate, “Warm Bodies” is more a mild-mannered, emo-flavored romcom than a zombie movie. It has some tepid action scenes, a few swatches of genuine humor and a general spirit of cheerfulness, especially considering it depicts a future in which civilization has been destroyed. That’s more than enough to make it a hit in the dreary depths of February, and early reviews suggest that we’ve all agreed to overlook the fact that it’s essentially lazy and stupid hackwork that makes the “Twilight” movies look like a collaboration between David Lynch and Robert Bresson.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2013/02/01/warm_bodies_love_with_an_emo_zombie/feed/ 10 “Twilight” finale leads Razzies worst-of list http://www.salon.com/2013/01/09/twilight_finale_leads_razzies_worst_of_list/ http://www.salon.com/2013/01/09/twilight_finale_leads_razzies_worst_of_list/#comments Wed, 09 Jan 2013 13:00:00 +0000 http://http://www.salon.com/2013/01/09/twilight_finale_leads_razzies_worst_of_list/ LOS ANGELES (AP) — The "Twilight" finale had better reviews than the franchise's previous four movies, but you'd never know it from the Razzie nominations singling out Hollywood's worst of the year.

"The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn — Part 2" led the Razzies lineup Tuesday night with 11 nominations, including worst picture, lead-acting slots for Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson and supporting-acting nominations for Taylor Lautner and Ashley Greene.

Other worst-picture nominees are the naval action tale "Battleship," the family flick "The Oogieloves in the Big Balloon Adventure," Adam Sandler's raunchy dud "That's My Boy" and Eddie Murphy's comedy flop "A Thousand Words."

A spoof of the Academy Awards, the Razzies announcement comes a little more than a day before the Oscar nominations. Razzie winners will be announced Feb. 23, the night before the Oscar ceremony.

___

Online:

http://www.razzies.com

 

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2013/01/09/twilight_finale_leads_razzies_worst_of_list/feed/ 2 “Twilight” stars are Hollywood’s top investment, says Forbes http://www.salon.com/2012/12/27/twilight_stars_are_hollywoods_top_investment_says_forbes/ http://www.salon.com/2012/12/27/twilight_stars_are_hollywoods_top_investment_says_forbes/#comments Thu, 27 Dec 2012 15:10:00 +0000 http://www.origin.railrode.net/?p=13155614 Forbes has released it's annual "Best Actors for the Buck" list, naming Natalie Portman and Kristen Stewart as this year's most profitable investments. A converse of their most overpaid actor list, the ranking analyzes what actors yield the greatest box office return compared to their salaries, creating a loose "return on investment" measure. Forbes explains the methodology:

We looked at the last three films each actor starred in over the last three years that opened in more than 2,000 theaters, calculating the return on investment for the studios who pay his (or her) salary. We didn’t count movies where the actor was in a supporting or large ensemble role and we didn’t count animated movies. The actors who score well on this list tend to have small paydays and star in highly profitable movies.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2012/12/27/twilight_stars_are_hollywoods_top_investment_says_forbes/feed/ 0 Kristen Stewart: The thinking person’s movie star http://www.salon.com/2012/12/18/kristen_stewart_not_just_the_twilight_girl_everyone_s_on/ http://www.salon.com/2012/12/18/kristen_stewart_not_just_the_twilight_girl_everyone_s_on/#comments Tue, 18 Dec 2012 15:00:00 +0000 http://www.origin.railrode.net/?p=13125334 I met Kristen Stewart somewhat unexpectedly. And I really liked her! I mean, she’s a cagey, cautious person; you can feel her sizing you up while she decides whether you’re an idiot or a nutjob and discerns how much she should stick to polite, neutral remarks. You might be like that, too, if you were 22 years old and the highest-paid actress in the history of Hollywood, and if you had seen an ordinary domestic spat with your boyfriend – the sort of thing a whole lot of 22-year-olds go through, if I remember correctly – become an international front-page tabloid story.

I did not ask her anything about Robert Pattinson or the current state of her love life. Because it’s not my business, and I really don’t care! So if that’s what you want to read, you might have to look elsewhere. But even in a brief and necessarily superficial conversation, I got a few flashes of real personality: Stewart is a young woman with a mischievous wit and a penchant for murmured, foul-mouthed asides who is enthusiastic about her work and also aware that her rocket-like ascension from the little-known indie ingénue of “Into the Wild” and “Adventureland” to a huge superstar has been an incredibly strange story.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2012/12/18/kristen_stewart_not_just_the_twilight_girl_everyone_s_on/feed/ 7 “Twilight” rakes in $141 million in debut weekend http://www.salon.com/2012/11/20/twilight_rakes_in_141_million_in_debut_weekend/ http://www.salon.com/2012/11/20/twilight_rakes_in_141_million_in_debut_weekend/#comments Tue, 20 Nov 2012 13:53:00 +0000 http://www.origin.railrode.net/?p=13103585 LOS ANGELES (AP) -- "Twilight" didn't fade out.

"The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2" earned $141 million domestically over opening weekend, putting the final "Twilight" in the eighth position on the list of all-time domestic debuts, leaving the supernatural series with three of the top-10 openings, joining 2009's "New Moon" (No. 7 with $142.8 million) and last year's "Breaking Dawn - Part 1" (No. 9 with $138.1 million).

The top 20 movies at U.S. and Canadian theaters Friday through Sunday, followed by distribution studio, gross, number of theater locations, average receipts per location, total gross and number of weeks in release, as compiled Monday by Hollywood.com are:

1. "The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2," Summit, $141,067,634, 4,070 locations, $34,660 average, $141,067,634, one week.

2. "Skyfall," Sony, $41,104,513, 3,505 locations, $11,727 average, $160,941,621, two weeks.

3. "Lincoln," Disney, $21,049,406, 1,775 locations, $11,859 average, $22,468,242, two weeks.

4. "Wreck-It Ralph," Disney, $18,582,937, 3,622 locations, $5,131 average, $121,750,227, three weeks.

5. "Flight," Paramount, $8,802,881, 2,612 locations, $3,370 average, $61,523,691, three weeks.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2012/11/20/twilight_rakes_in_141_million_in_debut_weekend/feed/ 0 Pick of the week: Robert Pattinson plays a real monster http://www.salon.com/2012/06/08/pick_of_the_week_robert_pattinson_plays_a_real_monster/ http://www.salon.com/2012/06/08/pick_of_the_week_robert_pattinson_plays_a_real_monster/#comments Fri, 08 Jun 2012 00:00:00 +0000 http://www.origin.railrode.net/?p=12934356 If Robert Pattinson had deliberately set out to alienate and bewilder his legions of "Twilight Saga" fans, he could hardly have done so more effectively than he does in "Bel Ami," an enjoyably soapy 19th-century costume drama with a crackling, female-centric cast that features Uma Thurman, Christina Ricci and Kristin Scott Thomas. British directing duo Declan Donnellan and Nick Ormerod's staging of the 1885 Guy de Maupassant novel (with a screenplay by Brit TV vet Rachel Bennette) isn't necessarily great cinema, but it's a witty, mean-spirited addition to the "Dangerous Liaisons" tradition, and provides an odd and pleasant surprise for anyone wondering how Pattinson will make use of his stardom.

In fact, I'm having a tough time resisting the idea that Georges Duroy, Pattinson's social-climbing war veteran in "Bel Ami," is meant as the diametrical opposite or photo-negative version of Edward Cullen from the "Twilight" films. Edward is, of course, a soulless undead creature who somehow isn't soulless; he has gone to the dark side without surrendering his humanity or his capacity for love. Georges is a human being who absorbs, and then inflicts, a kind of cruelty that vampires cannot imagine. Evil and soullessness are his survival strategies in a society that rewards callous manipulation, and he becomes more of a monster than Edward could ever be.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2012/06/08/pick_of_the_week_robert_pattinson_plays_a_real_monster/feed/ 6 Majoring in Potterology http://www.salon.com/2012/05/25/majoring_in_potterology/ http://www.salon.com/2012/05/25/majoring_in_potterology/#comments Fri, 25 May 2012 19:20:00 +0000 http://www.origin.railrode.net/?p=12925540 Last week in Scotland, 60 scholars gathered over two days for the U.K.'s first scholarly conference on the Harry Potter series. The Guardian newspaper quoted John Mullan, a professor of English at University College London, questioning the wisdom of organizing such an event. Concluding that the host college, the University of St. Andrews, was primarily after "publicity," Mullan suggested the attendees would be better off forgetting kids' books and cultivating their gravitas. "They should be reading Milton and 'Tristram Shandy,'" he told the Guardian. "That's what they're paid to do."

The criticism brought to mind a lengthy discussion on Reddit last year, inspired by an anecdote from a bookstore clerk who sold copies of all four "Twilight" novels to a sheepish professor. The professor's explanation: "Every time I reference low forms of literature, I always use 'Twilight' as the example. Today a student asked if I’ve actually read them, and I had to say no. They demanded that I do."

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2012/05/25/majoring_in_potterology/feed/ 84 Why is Hollywood still terrified of abortion? http://www.salon.com/2011/11/30/why_is_hollywood_still_terrified_of_abortion/ http://www.salon.com/2011/11/30/why_is_hollywood_still_terrified_of_abortion/#comments Wed, 30 Nov 2011 18:00:00 +0000 http://www.origin.railrode.net/?p=10275506 Of course Bella would keep Edward's baby. Dammit, she loves her sparkly vampire husband. She doesn't care about the concerns of her family and friends, their pleas that she consider the risks of carrying a hellspawn to term. Like Julia Roberts' saintly, ill-fated Shelby in "Steel Magnolias," who pursues a pregnancy because she "would rather have 30 minutes of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special" (and subsequently dies for it), Bella knows it's her body, her choice. And a "Twilight" franchise dreamed up by a nice Mormon lady isn't going to include a scene of newlywed, saved-herself-for-the-wedding night Bella trotting down to Planned Parenthood for a quickie D&C. No, her devotion to life is so great that it extends to life that isn't even quite human.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2011/11/30/why_is_hollywood_still_terrified_of_abortion/feed/ 56 “Breaking Dawn Part 1″: Bella Swan, demon mama or Christ figure? http://www.salon.com/2011/11/17/breaking_dawn_part_1_bella_swan_demon_mama_or_christ_figure/ http://www.salon.com/2011/11/17/breaking_dawn_part_1_bella_swan_demon_mama_or_christ_figure/#comments Thu, 17 Nov 2011 19:23:00 +0000 http://www.origin.railrode.net/?p=10231129 "How badly are you hurt?" murmurs studly but ethereal vampire Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) to his human bride, née Bella Swan (Kristen Stewart), on the morning after their wedding night. No no no no -- it's not what you're thinking. Edward's superhuman and indeed inhuman strength has left Bella's arms and torso covered with bruises (and, infamously, has shattered the headboard above their bed). Devotee of the union of Eros and Thanatos that she is, Bella digs it, and wants more. Being a man, albeit an undead one, Edward has second thoughts about the whole thing now that he's gotten what he came for, and spends the rest of their honeymoon on a Brazilian tropical island shying away from Bella, or playing chess with her. Which is a metaphor for, you know, sex or war or something. Or maybe not a metaphor at all but just chess, played by two people who self-evidently don't know how to play, with a strangely large and silly set of chessmen.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2011/11/17/breaking_dawn_part_1_bella_swan_demon_mama_or_christ_figure/feed/ 18 “Abduction”: Taylor Lautner's chest gets a movie http://www.salon.com/2011/09/23/abduction/ http://www.salon.com/2011/09/23/abduction/#comments Fri, 23 Sep 2011 17:45:00 +0000 http://www.salon.com/entertainment/movies/andrew_ohehir/2011/09/23/abduction Writing a review of "Abduction," the new thriller designed as a star vehicle for "Twilight" hunk Taylor Lautner, is pretty much a free-fire zone. Lautner's fan base -- which I would presume to be young and female and interested in viewing his hairless and monumental chest -- isn't super-likely to read reviews before rushing out to see the movie. On the other hand, if you're here reading this, the likelihood that you're actually going to pay to watch "Abduction" is exceptionally low. So I can pretty much make up any damn thing without fear of contradiction: The sequence where aliens destroy the earth was pretty cool, but the B&D sex scene between Lautner and Sigourney Weaver was somewhat disturbing. Unless it was the other way around.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2011/09/23/abduction/feed/ 7 The emasculation of the modern vampire? http://www.salon.com/2011/07/29/emasculation_of_the_modern_vampire/ http://www.salon.com/2011/07/29/emasculation_of_the_modern_vampire/#comments Fri, 29 Jul 2011 21:30:00 +0000 http://www.salon.com/entertainment/tv/feature/2011/07/29/emasculation_of_the_modern_vampire Screenwriter Brian McGreevy did a guest stint on Vulture today with a diatribe on the emasculation of vampires in modern media, specifically in "True Blood" and "Twilight." "True Blood," at least, began with McGreevy's ideal sexy/dangerous vampire -- if not in Bill Compton, than in Eric Northman. Of course, now that Eric has lost his memory and Bill is playing at being a prissy little king, it's totally reasonable for McGreevy to assert that these characters "have taken the Romantic vampire and cut off his balls, leaving a pallid emo pansy with the gaseous pretentiousness of a perfume commercial. We are now left with the Castrati vampire."

Unfortunately, this argument smacks of chauvinism. McGreevy (currently adapting Bram Stoker's "Dracula" for the big screen) blames this on a new, dangerous "female gaze" -- as opposed to the misogynistic "male gaze" as defined by feminist film theorist Laura Mulvey in her essay "Visual Pleasure and Narrative Cinema." The female gaze, he suggests, makes these non-threatening vampires "pornography for tweens." When he asserts that "Mad Men's" Don Draper is actually more of a vampire than any of the "True Blood" or "Twilight" characters, what he's saying is that Draper is more of a man.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2011/07/29/emasculation_of_the_modern_vampire/feed/ 25 Today’s must-see viral videos http://www.salon.com/2011/07/06/viral_videos_jay_leno_bombs/ http://www.salon.com/2011/07/06/viral_videos_jay_leno_bombs/#comments Wed, 06 Jul 2011 16:07:00 +0000 http://www.salon.com/entertainment/tv/feature/2011/07/06/viral_videos_jay_leno_bombs 1. "Independence Day" on Independence Day

While most of us spent July 4th blowing up fireworks to celebrate our emancipation from the Brits, comedian Sean Kleier made us remember the true meaning of Independence Day by reciting Bill Pullman's speech from the movie all over New York City.

 

2. "Glee" goes viral

The stars of the Fox musical stopped by Internet star Keenan Cahill's to cover Katy Perry's "Last Friday Night."

 

3. Field of "NFL" Dreams

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2011/07/06/viral_videos_jay_leno_bombs/feed/ 5 Edward Cullen is killing Robert Pattinson http://www.salon.com/2011/04/21/robert_pattinson_water_for_elephants/ http://www.salon.com/2011/04/21/robert_pattinson_water_for_elephants/#comments Thu, 21 Apr 2011 19:22:00 +0000 http://www.salon.com/entertainment/movies/2011/04/21/robert_pattinson_water_for_elephants Robert Pattinson has a lot riding on the new romantic drama "Water for Elephants," which opens Friday. Namely, can the young actor, who has made his name in the "Twilight" sagas, transition from broody teen heartthrob to broody adult actor?

The 25-year-old British actor faces a career conundrum that many other young, frenzy-inciting men have faced in the past: Can you make the ladies still love you even when they're past adolescence? Can you prove your marquee value in fare that has grown-up -- and dude -- appeal? Johnny Depp did it. Will Smith did it. Even Justin Timberlake did it. And they did it following much the same path Pattinson now does: by choosing projects that took them just far enough outside of their comfort zone that the work seemed somehow new, all while keeping their loyal fan bases reassured. But there's one big difference: the charm factor.

Pattinson's been testing the waters of career expansion for some time, in smaller films like "Little Ashes," where he played Salvador Dalí, and "How to Be," a comedy in which he played a Gus so gloomy Edward Cullen would beg to lighten up. Now, as Jacob, the narrator of "Water for Elephants," Pattinson cuts yet another bleak figure.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2011/04/21/robert_pattinson_water_for_elephants/feed/ 18 When did movie monsters get so sexy? http://www.salon.com/2011/03/11/horror_sexy_monsters_vampire_twilight/ http://www.salon.com/2011/03/11/horror_sexy_monsters_vampire_twilight/#comments Fri, 11 Mar 2011 18:01:00 +0000 http://www.salon.com/entertainment/movies/feature/2011/03/11/horror_sexy_monsters_vampire_twilight It may have started with King Kong: the image of that giant beast holding Fay Wray in his oversize mitt as he swatted off planes on top of the Empire State Building. To be fair, the ape hit upon the idea of using the iconic tower as a romantic getaway nearly 25 years before Cary Grant in "An Affair to Remember."

Or maybe it was Max Schreck in 1922's "Nosferatu": With his sunken eyes and shy demeanor, the biggest difference between the Transylvanian bat-creature and the kids from "Twilight" is personal grooming choices.

Or maybe it was Bela Legosi as Dracula. Or Frank Langella as Dracula. Or Gary Oldman as Dracula.

Wherever the original seed was planted, its effects are widespread today. Monsters are among us. And they are super sexy, romantic and just want you to love them.

We probably have Anne Rice to blame for this: The writer's gothic "Interview With the Vampire" book and subsequent series made neck-biting sexy and spawned a whole generation of goth kids thinking that heavy petting always involved a blood transfusion.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2011/03/11/horror_sexy_monsters_vampire_twilight/feed/ 17 “Red Riding Hood”: The “Showgirls” of fairy-tale movies http://www.salon.com/2011/03/10/red_riding_hood/ http://www.salon.com/2011/03/10/red_riding_hood/#comments Thu, 10 Mar 2011 23:01:00 +0000 http://www.salon.com/entertainment/movies/andrew_ohehir/2011/03/10/red_riding_hood Warner Bros. has kept "Twilight" director Catherine Hardwicke's new film of "Red Riding Hood" tightly under wraps until this week, and now that I've seen it, I can understand why. It's not quite because "Red Riding Hood" is a monumental disaster, although I'm sure some reviews will make it sound that way. It's more that it's strange and stupid and half-compelling and sometimes beautiful, with its big, bad talking wolf and Amanda Seyfried's big, blue, startled eyes and a Christmas-card medieval village inhabited by escapees from a mid-'90s prime-time soap. I can imagine people liking "Red Riding Hood" -- indeed, some people will love it, in that highly contemporary half-ironic spirit -- but its WTF factor is off the charts, beginning with Hardwicke's all-too-obvious attempt to avenge herself upon the "Twilight" franchise.

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]]> http://www.salon.com/2011/03/10/red_riding_hood/feed/ 19 “I am Number Four” — and I am awful http://www.salon.com/2011/02/17/i_am_number_four/ http://www.salon.com/2011/02/17/i_am_number_four/#comments Thu, 17 Feb 2011 02:01:00 +0000 http://www.salon.com/entertainment/movies/andrew_ohehir/2011/02/16/i_am_number_four If you feel like a substandard knockoff "Twilight" movie is far better than no "Twilight" movie at all -- well, first of all, there is no mockery or judgment here. This is a safe space. You can share with us. The disease is much, much bigger than you are. We get it. Yes, I think a Higher Power could help you, but that choice is yours. You understand, or at least your rational mind does, that "I Am Number Four" is an ultra-expedited movie-type product adapted from the first volume of "Lorien Legacies," the utterly cynical young-adult alien franchise created by James Frey, he of the not-entirely-truthful memoir. The distance between this movie and anybody who actually cares -- about it or anything else, frankly -- is measured in light-years and filled with dark matter, like the distance between galaxies.

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