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Saturday, Aug 26, 2006 1:00 PM UTC

Your Emmy picks — and ours

The results of Salon's TV Week Reader Poll are in. And the winners are...

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We asked, and nearly 4,000 of you voted on our creatively altered Emmy ballot. We’ve ranked your choices in each category in order of preference. (Nominees in red were additions by Salon, and not official Emmy nominees.) Our choices are at the end of each selection. And we’ll add the official Emmy winners after they’re announced on Sunday night. (Update: Go here for the full list of the actual winners.)

Outstanding Comedy Series
1. Arrested Development * Fox
2. The Office * NBC
3. Weeds * Showtime
4. Scrubs * NBC
5. Curb Your Enthusiasm * HBO
6. Reno 911 * Comedy Central
7. Will & Grace * NBC
8. Two and a Half Men * CBS

Our pick: Although “The Office” was consistently entertaining and the omission of “Weeds” from the nominees is nothing short of a disgrace, “Arrested Development” was unreasonably funny in its final season, outshining every other comedy in big, hearty laughs per minute. If only those nasty Bluths were returning to our loving arms this fall!

Outstanding Drama Series
1. Battlestar Galactica * SciFi
2. Deadwood * HBO
3. Six Feet Under * HBO
4. House * Fox
5. Lost * ABC
6. Veronica Mars * UPN
7. Grey’s Anatomy * ABC
8. The Sopranos * HBO
9. The West Wing * NBC / 24 * Fox (tie)
10. The Shield * FX

Our pick: “Six Feet Under.” Yes, the fact that “Lost” (last year’s Emmy winner), “Deadwood” and “Battlestar Galactica” weren’t nominated at all is egregious enough, but how in the world could they have passed up “Six Feet Under” in its final, brilliant season? As much as we’d love to give a hearty pat on the back to the first three, the send-off Alan Ball gave the Fishers will stay with us as the most emotionally riveting, memorable TV in recent history.

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series
1. The Office * NBC * Steve Carell as Michael Scott
2. Arrested Development * Fox * Jason Bateman as Michael Bluth
3. My Name Is Earl * NBC * Jason Lee as Earl Hickey
4. Monk * USA * Tony Shalhoub as Adrian Monk
5. Curb Your Enthusiasm * HBO * Larry David as himself
6. That 70s Show * Fox * Topher Grace as Eric Foreman
7. Two and a Half Men * CBS * Charlie Sheen as Charlie Harper
8. The King of Queens * CBS * Kevin James as Doug Heffernan

Our pick: While passing up Jason Bateman and Jason Lee as nominees in favor of Charlie Sheen is basically unfathomable, this one clearly goes to Steve Carell, whose oddball tics and comic flourishes make “The Office” the queasily fun freak show that it is.

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
1. Deadwood * HBO * Ian McShane as Al Swearengen
2. House * Fox * Hugh Laurie as Dr. Gregory House
3. Law & Order: Criminal Intent * NBC * Vincent D’Onofrio as Robert Goren
4. Six Feet Under * HBO * Peter Krause as Nate Fisher
5. Rescue Me * FX * Denis Leary as Tommy Gavin
6. The West Wing * NBC * Martin Sheen as President Josiah Bartlet
7. 24 * Fox * Kiefer Sutherland as Jack Bauer
8. Law & Order SVU * NBC * Christopher Meloni as Elliot Stabler
9. The Shield * FX * Michael Chiklis as Vic Mackey

Our pick: We love Peter Krause, Hugh Laurie and Michael Chiklis in this category, but no one comes close to Ian McShane of “Deadwood.” We could watch that man polish silver for an hour every week — and apparently Academy voters were polishing their silver instead of watching “Deadwood” last summer, or else McShane would be taking home a little golden c***sucker this year.

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series
1. Weeds * Showtime * Mary Louise Parker as Nancy Botwin
2. Malcolm in the Middle * Fox * Jane Kaczmarek as Lois
3. The Comeback * HBO * Lisa Kudrow as Valerie Cherish
4. Will & Grace * NBC * Debra Messing as Grace Adler
5. The New Adventures of Old Christine * CBS * Julia Louis-Dreyfus as Christine Campbell
6. Out of Practice * CBS * Stockard Channing as Lydia Barnes

Our pick: Mary Louise Parker clearly deserved the nomination for her role on “Weeds,” but our favorite in this category is still Lisa Kudrow, for her brilliance on “The Comeback.” (Note to HBO: Bring Valerie Cherish back, damn it!)

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series
1. Battlestar Galactica * SciFi * Mary McDonnell as President Laura Roslin
2. Veronica Mars * UPN * Kristen Bell as Veronica Mars
3. Six Feet Under * HBO * Frances Conroy as Ruth Fisher
4. Six Feet Under * HBO * Lauren Ambrose as Claire Fisher
5. Law & Order: Special Victims Unit * NBC * Mariska Hargitay as Olivia Benson
6. The Closer * TNT * Kyra Sedgewick as Brenda Leigh Johnson
7. The West Wing * NBC * Allison Janney as C.J. Cregg
8. Deadwood * HBO * Molly Parker as Alma Garret
9. Commander in Chief * ABC * Geena Davis as Mackenzie Allen

Our pick: As great as Mary McDonnell and Molly Parker were, who can deny Frances Conroy’s fine performance on “Six Feet Under”?

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series
1. Arrested Development * Fox * Will Arnett as Gob Bluth
2. Entourage * HBO * Jeremy Piven as Ari Gold
3. Arrested Development * Fox * David Cross as Tobias Funke
4. Will & Grace * NBC * Sean Hayes as Jack
5. My Name Is Earl * NBC * Giovanni Ribisi as Ralph Mariano
6. Malcolm in the Middle * Fox * Bryan Cranston as Hal
7. Weeds * Showtime * Justin Kirk as Andy Botwin
8. Two and a Half Men * CBS * Jon Cryer as Alan Harper
9. Weeds * Showtime * Kevin Nealon as Doug Wilson

Our pick: Kevin Nealon, Sean Hayes, Jeremy Piven, David Cross and Will Arnett? This category is packed with serious comic talent, and how do you compare Jack to Gob, or Ari to Tobias? For some reason, though, we can’t quite get the understated idiocy of Doug Wilson on “Weeds” out of our pea brains, so this one goes to Kevin Nealon.

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series
1. Six Feet Under * HBO * Michael C. Hall as David Fisher
2. The Sopranos * HBO * Michael Imperioli as Christopher Moltisanti
3. Lost * ABC * Terry O’Quinn as John Locke
4. Boston Legal * ABC * William Shatner as Denny Crane
5. Veronica Mars * UPN * Enrico Colantoni as Keith Mars
6. 24 * Fox * Gregory Itzin as Charles Logan
7. The West Wing * NBC * Alan Alda as Arnold Vinick
8. Lost * ABC * Naveen Andrews as Sayid Jarrah
9. Huff * Showtime * Oliver Platt as Russell Tupper

Our pick: How is it possible that Michael C. Hall of “Six Feet Under” is passed up for this category, year after year, when he’s one of the most riveting, nuanced actors on TV? And William Shatner won last year? Where does the Academy of TV Arts and Sciences find the lobotomized monkeys who vote for this stuff, anyway?

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series
1. My Name Is Earl * NBC * Jaime Pressly as Joy
2. Arrested Development * Fox * Jessica Walter as Lucille Bluth
3. Weeds * Showtime * Elizabeth Perkins as Celia Hodes
4. Scrubs * NBC * Sarah Chalke as Elliot Reid
5. Will & Grace * NBC * Megan Mullally as Karen
6. Curb Your Enthusiasm * HBO * Cheryl Hines as Cheryl David
7. Arrested Development * Fox * Portia de Rossi as Lindsay Funke
8. Desperate Housewives * ABC * Alfre Woodard as Betty Applewhite

Our pick: While Jessica Walter was just as brilliant as ever on “Arrested Development” and Jaime Pressly was fantastic as Joy on “My Name Is Earl,” we have to give this one to Elizabeth Perkins for her mesmerizing, tragicomic turn as Celia Hodes on “Weeds.”

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series
1. Battlestar Galactica * SciFi * Katee Sackhoff as Kara Thrace (Starbuck)
2. Deadwood * HBO * Paula Malcomson as Trixie
3. Six Feet Under * HBO * Rachel Griffiths as Brenda Fisher
4. 24 * Fox * Jean Smart as Martha Logan
5. Grey’s Anatomy * ABC * Sandra Oh as Cristina Yang
6. Grey’s Anatomy * ABC * Chandra Wilson as Dr. Bailey
7. The West Wing * NBC * Stockard Channing as Abigail Bartlet
8. Boston Legal * ABC * Candice Bergen as Shirley Schmidt
9. Huff * Showtime * Blythe Danner as Izzy Huffstodt

Our pick: As much as we loved Rachel Griffiths of “Six Feet Under” and Paula Malcomson of “Deadwood,” Jean Smart’s jittery, eminently sympathetic performance as Martha Logan was one of the major highlights of “24″ last season.

Outstanding Variety, Music or Comedy Series
1. The Daily Show With Jon Stewart * Comedy Central
2. The Colbert Report * Comedy Central
3. Real Time With Bill Maher * HBO
4. Chappelle’s Show * Comedy Central
5. Da Ali G Show * HBO
6. Late Show With David Letterman * CBS
7. Late Night With Conan O Brien * NBC
8. The Tonight Show With Jay Leno * NBC
9. The Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson * NBC

Our pick: Lord knows how much we adore “The Colbert Report,” but in terms of consistent laughs, night after night, our heart belongs to “The Daily Show With Jon Stewart.”

Outstanding Animated Program (for Programming Less Than One Hour)
1. South Park * Comedy Central
2. The Simpsons * Fox
3. Family Guy * Fox
4. The Boondocks * Cartoon Network
5. Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends * Cartoon Network
6. Drawn Together * Comedy Central
7. Camp Lazlo * The Sting * Fox

Our pick: “South Park.” Thank the good Lord we have Trey Parker and Matt Stone to take the piss out of Scientology in the manner it so richly deserves. The whole Chef series, ending in his untimely death, was so very, very rich, we’ll treasure it for years to come.

Outstanding Miniseries
1. Elizabeth I * HBO
2. Bleak House * PBS
3. Sleeper Cell * Showtime
4. Into the West * TNT

Our pick: “Bleak House” was addictive and sharp, but nothing held our attention quite like Showtime’s dark but moving “Sleeper Cell.”

Outstanding Reality Program
1. 30 Days * FX
2. Penn & Teller: Bullshit! * Showtime
3. Antiques Roadshow * PBS
4. Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List * Bravo
5. The Dog Whisperer * National Geographic
6. Extreme Makeover: Home Edition * ABC
7. Intervention * A&E
8. Laguna Beach * MTV
9. So Notorious * VH1

Our pick: Frankly, aside from “Penn & Teller,” the nominees in this category strike us as utter “Bullshit!” Which leaves us to our own nominees: Both “Intervention” and “30 Days” are informative, intelligent shows that push the boundaries of reality programming, but for its overall consciousness-raising and entertainment value, we’re going to have to go with Morgan Spurlock’s “30 Days.”

Outstanding Reality-Competition Program
1. Project Runway * Bravo
2. The Amazing Race * CBS
3. American Idol * Fox
4. Survivor * CBS
5. Dancing With the Stars * ABC
6. So You Think You Can Dance * Fox
7. America’s Next Top Model * UPN
8. Rock Star * CBS

Our pick: Come on, is there really any question that “Project Runway” completely outshines the other nominees in this category? The combination of creative challenges, smart casting, and clever editing add up to “Project Runway” setting the bar increasingly high for all the other reality competitions.

Worst Show on Television
1. Big Brother * CBS
2. Flavor of Love * VH1
3. Laguna Beach * MTV
4. My Fair Brady * VH1
5. Two and a Half Men * CBS
6. 24 * Fox
7. Entourage * HBO
8. The L Word * Showtime

Our pick: While “Entourage” remains skin-deep and “Two and a Half Men” remains laugh-free, nothing offends quite like empty-headed rich kids, prattling on about their sad little lives for a half-hour every week as the unbearably sugary pop anthem du jour struggles mightily to make it all seem dramatic and important. But we still owe an honorable mention to VH1′s “Flavor of Love,” whose Springer-esque catfights and nauseating antics gave MTV a run for its money.

Saturday, Sep 17, 2005 9:21 PM UTC

The Buffy

Salon's second annual award for the most underappreciated television show in all the land.

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The awarding of last year’s Buffy, our first-ever award for the most underappreciated show on all of television, was an easy choice. “The Wire” is simply everything we want out of a TV show: We bond forcefully with the characters of David Simon’s Shakespearean urban drama and become deeply invested in the plot; the violent death of thug kingpin Stringer Bell last season left us feeling giddy, sad, enlightened and anxious — just as a searing dramatization of the dynamics behind poverty, the war on drugs, and the class/race ceiling should. Our Sunday night HBO votive burns as bright for “The Wire” as it does for all those other shows — and frequently, much brighter.

The Emmy graciously bowed to The Buffy’s wisdom this year, offering a belated nomination to “The Wire” for outstanding writing. A token gesture, sure. But at least they’re learning.

This year, deciding who was truly worthy of following in “The Wire’s” footsteps was a tougher assignment. Following the advice of people we trust, we have become fans of SciFi’s “Battlestar Galactica.” We’re continually irritated that “The Daily Show” isn’t given much Emmy prominence, the way it’s shoved into the category of variety, music or comedy series — let’s face it, the show’s a lot more influential, and hilarious, than anything nominated for best comedy series, and it’s daily. And now that writers are demanding that they be treated appropriately for scripting “reality” TV, should one of the several great shows from that genre deserve greater recognition? Also, we really do have a soft spot for “Gilmore Girls,” and the devilishly crisp writing on “Nip/Tuck” at times seems like everything “Desperate Housewives” could ever hope to be. Such tough decisions!


Kristen Bell in “Veronica Mars”

“Veronica Mars” (9 p.m. Wednesdays, UPN), Rob Thomas, creator

We could go on and on and on about the terrific debut season of “Veronica Mars.” Oh wait — we already have. First, Heather Havrilesky swooned:

“I love Veronica Mars. I love the way her crappy attitude doesn’t match her sweet doll face and her bouncy blond hair. I love her outfits, with those tall boots and short skirts and argyle socks and little cardigans, unnerving ensembles that mix one part tough tomboy with two parts trashy Catholic schoolgirl. I love that she’s capable and decisive and smart and doesn’t waste her time whining about her insecurities and crushes like the rest of us did as teenagers. I love the way she always thinks of the perfect, snappy retort, the likes of which would only occur to us in the middle of a sleepless night. I love that she recognizes the power of chirping like a ditzy bimbo to get access to the information she needs. I love how she makes friends with the outcasts and losers at school and refuses to socialize with the popular kids, even as she’s forced to empathize with them. I love that she’s been through hell — her friend’s death, her mother’s disappearance, her mysterious rape — and she’s pissed off about it, but she doesn’t have time to wallow. She’s too busy doing professional detective work — dangerous, high-pressure jobs! — in order to help her daddy pay the rent. Veronica is busy and efficient but never flustered, snide but never unjust, full of feminine wiles but never slutty and pathetic. She’s a role model not just for high school girls, but for grown women.”

Then Stephanie Zacharek swayed:

“At the beginning of the season, in particular, ‘Veronica Mars’ seemed like just the salve for all those still-in-mourning ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’ fans out there (myself included). The two shows are similar in some ways. They both feature teenage girls — blond California girls, to be exact — with heavy-duty responsibilities: One has to solve a crime that has affected her deeply; the other merely has to save the world…

“‘Buffy’ was a very different show from ‘Veronica Mars,’ with a markedly more fatalistic tone and an almost operatic sense of tragedy. But it did lay some crucial groundwork for ‘Veronica Mars’: While both shows pretend to be geared toward a teen audience, it’s really adults, well past the trauma of teenagerhood but still all too aware of how much it can sting, that gravitate toward them. The character Veronica is very much grounded in the real world: Formerly a member of the rich, cool crowd, she’s now a pariah at her school; she has good reason to believe she’s the victim of a rape, but she can’t remember it; and, worst of all, her best friend has been murdered … I think the fairest and most accurate way to compare the two is to accept that ‘Veronica Mars’ is a continuation of a broad theme that ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’ set in motion — the idea that teenagers, as both Shakespeare and the Shangri-Las realized, are near-adults whose seemingly innocent disappointments and fears aren’t really innocent at all: They’re just nascent versions of our ongoing grown-up ones.”

And what more, really, can we say? Except for something obvious to us, and most of you, but probably needs to be explicitly stated for those who still haven’t fallen for the charms of “Veronica Mars” and fear it’s just another well-done teen drama, with tears and fears and important lessons about life and love: “Veronica Mars” is as smart a whodunit as any that have appeared on recent TV, and its season-long arc was every bit as tautly written and engrossing as — dare we say it — last season’s spectacular installment of “The Wire.” Don’t let its hard-candy colors fool you. “Veronica Mars” is a gritty noir with nail-biting plot twists. Its Philip Marlowe just happens to favor pigtails sometimes.

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Friday, Sep 16, 2005 10:11 PM UTC

The Emmy winners — and your picks

They loved "Raymond" -- you didn't. We loved "Six Feet Under," and so did you -- but Emmy did not. The Emmy winnners, your choices and ours.

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We asked, and more than 10,000 of you voted on our souped-up Emmy ballot. We’ve ranked your very, very smart choices in each category by order of preference. (Nominees in red were additions by Salon, and not official Emmy nominees.) The actual winners, along with our choices, are at the end of each selection.

Outstanding Comedy Series
1. Arrested Development * Fox
2. Curb Your Enthusiasm * HBO
3. Scrubs * NBC
4. South Park * Comedy Central
5. Reno 911 * Comedy Central
6. Desperate Housewives * ABC
7. Two and a Half Men * CBS
8. Everybody Loves Raymond * CBS
9. Will & Grace * NBC

Emmy winner: “Everybody Loves Raymond.”

Our pick: “Arrested Development” is terrific, but “South Park,” also nominated below under Animated Series, is bigger than that: It’s the most consistently funny show on TV. Need a reminder?

Outstanding Drama Series
1. Six Feet Under * HBO
2. Deadwood * HBO
3. Lost * ABC
4. Veronica Mars * UPN
5. Battlestar Galactica * SciFi
6. The Wire * HBO
7. The West Wing * NBC
8. 24 * Fox
9. The Shield * FX

Emmy winner: “Lost.”

Our pick: “Six Feet Under.” Call us crazy sentimentalists, but if the death of Nate brought us a sick sense of justified relief, the death of everyone else felt personal. And the death of the show “Six Feet Under” feels … well, honestly, we’re still in denial. While the fourth season (which aired in 2004, and is what earned this nomination) was more disjointed than others, it still rose above the rest.

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series
1. Arrested Development * Fox * Jason Bateman as Michael Bluth
2. Scrubs * NBC * Zach Braff as J.D. Dorian
3. Da Ali G Show * HBO * Sacha Baron Cohen as Bruno, Borat and Ali
4. Monk * USA * Tony Shalhoub as Adrian Monk
5. Curb Your Enthusiasm * HBO * Larry David as himself
6. That ’70s Show * Fox * Topher Grace as Eric Foreman
7. Will & Grace * NBC * Eric McCormack as Will Truman
8. Two and a Half Men * CBS * Charlie Sheen as Charlie Harper
9. Everybody Loves Raymond * CBS * Ray Romano as Ray Barone

Emmy winner: Tony Shalhoub as Adrian Monk.

Our pick: Sacha Baron Cohen as Bruno, Borat and Ali G.

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
1. Deadwood * HBO * Ian McShane as Al Swearengen
2. House * Fox * Hugh Laurie as Dr. Gregory House
3. Six Feet Under * HBO * Peter Krause as Nate Fisher
4. Law & Order: Criminal Intent * NBC * Vincent D’Onofrio as Det. Robert Goren
5. Boston Legal * ABC * James Spader as Alan Shore
6. 24 * Fox * Kiefer Sutherland as Jack Bauer
7. The Wire * HBO * Dominic West as Jimmy McNulty
8. The Shield * HBO * Michael Chiklis as Det. Vic Mackey
9. Huff * NBC * Hank Azaria as Craig Huffstodt

Emmy winner: James Spader as Alan Shore.

Our pick: Ian McShane as Al Swearengen — and thank you, Emmy voters, for listening to us last year!

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series
1. Malcolm in the Middle * Fox * Jane Kaczmarek as Lois
2. Curb Your Enthusiasm * HBO * Cheryl Hines as Cheryl David
3. Desperate Housewives * ABC * Marcia Cross as Bree Van De Camp
4. Desperate Housewives * ABC * Felicity Huffman as Lynette Scavo
5. Will & Grace * NBC * Debra Messing as Grace Adler
6. Fat Actress * Showtime * Kirstie Alley as Kirstie Alley
7. Everybody Loves Raymond * CBS * Patricia Heaton as Debra Barone
8. Desperate Housewives * ABC * Eva Longoria as Gabrielle Solis
9. Desperate Housewives * ABC * Teri Hatcher as Susan Mayer

Emmy winner: Felicity Huffman as Lynette Scavo.

Our pick: Many of you wrote in, chastising us for not including Lauren Graham (“Gilmore Girls”), and you were probably right to do so. Slim pickings here. Next year, with Lisa Kudrow (“The Comeback”) and Mary Louise Parker (“Weeds”) eligible, this category will be smokin’. Until then, we’re going with Jane Kaczmarek.

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series
1. Six Feet Under * HBO * Frances Conroy as Ruth Fisher
2. Six Feet Under * HBO * Lauren Ambrose as Claire Fisher
3. Veronica Mars * UPN * Kristen Bell as Veronica Mars
4. Battlestar Galactica * SciFi * Mary McDonnell as President Laura Roslin
5. Law & Order: Special Victims Unit * NBC * Mariska Hargitay as Det. Olivia Benson
6. Deadwood * HBO * Molly Parker as Alma Garret
7. The Shield * FX * Glenn Close as Capt. Monica Rawling
8. Alias * ABC * Jennifer Garner as Sydney Bristow
9. Medium * NBC * Patricia Arquette as Allison Dubois

Emmy winner: Patricia Arquette as Allison Dubois.

Our pick: This is close. We think Bell’s swell, we loved Ambrose’s Claire, and Mary McDonnell is creating a character the likes of which we’ve never seen before. But Frances Conroy was never less than amazing.

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series
1. Entourage * HBO * Jeremy Piven as Ari
2. Arrested Development * Fox * Will Arnett as Gob Bluth
3. Arrested Development * Fox * David Cross as Tobias Funke
4. Arrested Development * Fox * Jeffrey Tambor as George Bluth Sr.
5. Malcolm in the Middle * Fox * Bryan Cranston as Hal
6. Will & Grace * NBC * Sean Hayes as Jack
7. Everybody Loves Raymond * CBS * Peter Boyle as Frank Barone
8. Everybody Loves Raymond * CBS * Brad Garrett as Robert Barone

Emmy winner: Brad Garrett as Robert Barone.

Our pick:Jeremy Piven as Ari.

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series
1. Six Feet Under * HBO * Michael C. Hall as David Fisher
2. Lost * ABC * Terry O’Quinn as John Locke
3. The Wire * HBO * Idris Elba as Russell “Stringer” Bell
4. Veronica Mars * UPN * Enrico Colantoni as Keith Mars
5. The West Wing * NBC * Alan Alda as Sen. Arnold Vinick
6. Boston Legal * ABC * William Shatner as Denny Crane
7. Lost * ABC * Naveen Andrews as Sayid Jarrah
8. Huff * Showtime * Oliver Platt as Russell Tupper

Emmy winner: William Shatner as Denny Crane.

Our pick: This is truly the year’s biggest Emmy outrage. Michael C. Hall’s David Fisher is simply one of the most vivid, emotionally searing performances ever to appear on prime time television. Shame on you, Emmy. Shame.

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series
1. Arrested Development * Fox * Jessica Walter as Lucille Bluth
2. Scrubs * NBC * Sarah Chalke as Elliot Reid
3. Arrested Development * Fox * Portia de Rossi as Lindsay Funke
4. Will & Grace * NBC * Megan Mullally as Karen
5. Everybody Loves Raymond * CBS * Doris Roberts as Marie Barone
6. Joey * NBC * Jennifer Coolidge as Bobbie
7. Two and a Half Men * CBS * Conchata Ferrell as Berta
8. Two and a Half Men * CBS * Holland Taylor as Evelyn Harper

Emmy winner: Doris Roberts as Marie Barone

Our pick: Jessica Walter

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series
1. Six Feet Under * HBO * Rachel Griffiths as Brenda Fisher
2 Battlestar Galactica * SciFi * Katee Sackhoff as Lt. Kara Thrace (“Starbuck”)
3. Grey’s Anatomy * ABC * Sandra Oh as Cristina Yang
4. Deadwood * HBO * Paula Malcomson as Trixie
5. The West Wing * NBC * Stockard Channing as Dr. Abigail Bartlet
6. The Shield * FX * CCH Pounder as Det. Claudette Wyms
7. Judging Amy * CBS * Tyne Daly as Maxine Gray
8. Huff * Showtime * Blythe Danner as Izzy Huffstodt

Emmy winner: Blythe Danner as Izzy Huffstodt

Our pick: We’re getting boring here, we know, but the “Six Feet” cast is a legendary one. Rachel Griffiths as Brenda Fisher.

Outstanding Miniseries
1. The 4400 * USA
2. Empire Falls * HBO
3. The Lost Prince (Masterpiece Theatre) * PBS
4. Elvis * CBS
5. Revelations * NBC

Emmy winner: “The Lost Prince”

Our pick: “The 4400″

Outstanding Variety, Music or Comedy Series
1. The Daily Show With Jon Stewart * Comedy Central
2. Real Time With Bill Maher * HBO
3. Da Ali G Show * HBO
4. Late Show With David Letterman * CBS
5. Late Night With Conan O’Brien * NBC
6. The Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson * NBC
7. The Tonight Show With Jay Leno * NBC

Emmy winner: “The Daily Show With Jon Stewart”

Our pick: “The Daily Show With Jon Stewart”

Outstanding Animated Program (For Programming Less Than One Hour)
1. The Simpsons * Fox
2. South Park * Comedy Central
3. Futurama * The Sting * Fox
4. Aqua Teen Hunger Force * Cartoon Network
5. SpongeBob SquarePants * Nickelodeon
6. Samurai Jack * Cartoon Network
7. Drawn Together * Comedy Central

Emmy winner: “South Park”

Our pick: “South Park”

Outstanding Reality Program
1. Penn & Teller: Bullshit! * Showtime
2. Antiques Roadshow * PBS
3. Queer Eye for the Straight Guy * Bravo
4. Project Greenlight * HBO
5. Extreme Makeover: Home Edition * ABC
6. Super Sweet Sixteen * MTV
7. Newlyweds * MTV
8. Real World: Philadelphia * MTV

Emmy winner: “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition”

Our pick: We genuinely admire the class warfare MTV has launched with shows, such as “Super Sweet Sixteen,” which are meant solely to move us closer to wholesale, violent rebellion against the filthy rich. Bravo, comrades at MTV! If only the shows were any good! So “Penn & Teller: Bullshit,” wins.

Outstanding Reality-Competition Program
1. The Amazing Race * CBS
2. Project Runway * Bravo
3. America’s Next Top Model * UPN
4. Dancing With the Stars * ABC
5. Survivor * CBS
6. American Idol * Fox
7. The Apprentice * NBC
8. The Swan * Fox

Emmy winner: “The Amazing Race”

Our pick: We’re increasingly irritated by the cheap casting stunts on “The Amazing Race.” Please, no more couples that your screeners suggest have “anger-management issues,” no more pro wrestlers, and please go easy on the models (except the Christian models — we honestly couldn’t get enough of them). Still, “The Amazing Race” is one serious class act — nothing else in this field (“The Apprentice”? You jest.) comes remotely close.

Worst show on television
1. Britney and Kevin: Chaotic * UPN
2. The Swan * Fox
3. 7th Heaven * WB
4. The Simple Life 3: Interns * Fox
5. Yes, Dear * CBS
6. Laguna Beach * MTV
7. Two and a Half Men * CBS
8. 24 * Fox
9. Carnivale * HBO

Our pick: We’re tempted to pick “Laguna Beach,” because the idea of sending camera crews to follow the shallowest, stupidest high school teenagers around so as to encourage them to behave even more shallow and stupid — and cruel — all for our enjoyment is genuinely pretty sick. But, as with “Super Sweet Sixteen,” we applaud MTV’s subversive class warfare here; if “Laguna Beach” doesn’t inspire apathetic teens and 20somethings to storm the gated communities of America with a little social justice on their minds, we don’t know what will. And “The Swan,” which Fox admits was created by Satan himself, is so evil that loyal viewers can pretty much count on first-class trips straight to hell. No, not a close call here at all.

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Monday, Sep 12, 2005 7:23 PM UTC

Your Emmy ballot

Vote for TV's best -- and worst -- on our modified ballot, where the nominees vie against those who deserved to win, and those who really don't.

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This year’s Emmy choices weren’t all that terrible. After all, they finally nominated “Deadwood” and “Six Feet Under” (which wasn’t eligible last year) for best drama, and Ian McShane of “Deadwood” finally got recognized for his scene-stealing brilliance. In other words, they took a lot of our suggestions from last year.

But then there are those desperate housewives, three of them. Felicity Huffman is certainly worthy, but … Teri Hatcher? Oh, how we dearly wish “The Comeback” was eligible this year (it began after the Emmy deadline) so that Valerie Cherish (er, Lisa Kudrow) could be taking this award home to display in her brand-new yoga room.

We all have our own opinions on these things, and we’d like to know yours. So consider carefully, and cast your choices on the Emmy ballot below by Thursday, 5 p.m. EDT. The choices in red are the ones that the Academy left off — some of whom deserved to win, and others who earned only our scorn. But we’ll leave that decision up to you.

Then on Friday, we’ll announce your picks (at 5 p.m., PDT) — and ours!

Outstanding Comedy Series
Arrested Development * Fox
Desperate Housewives * ABC
Everybody Loves Raymond * CBS
Scrubs * NBC
Will & Grace * NBC
South Park * Comedy Central
Reno 911 * Comedy Central
Curb Your Enthusiasm * HBO
Two and a Half Men * CBS

Outstanding Drama Series
Deadwood * HBO
Lost * ABC
Six Feet Under * HBO
24 * Fox
The West Wing * NBC
Veronica Mars * UPN
The Wire * HBO
The Shield * FX
Battlestar Galactica * SciFi

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series
Arrested Development * Fox * Jason Bateman as Michael Bluth
Everybody Loves Raymond * CBS * Ray Romano as Ray Barone
Scrubs * NBC * Zach Braff as J.D. Dorian
Will & Grace * NBC * Eric McCormack as Will Truman
Monk * USA * Tony Shalhoub as Adrian Monk
Da Ali G Show * HBO * Sacha Baron Cohen as Bruno, Borat and Ali
That ’70s Show * Fox * Topher Grace as Eric Foreman
Curb Your Enthusiasm * HBO * Larry David as himself
Two and a Half Men * CBS * Charlie Sheen as Charlie Harper

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
Boston Legal * ABC * James Spader as Alan Shore
Deadwood * HBO * Ian McShane as Al Swearengen
House * Fox * Hugh Laurie as Dr. Gregory House
Huff * NBC * Hank Azaria as Craig Huffstodt
24 * Fox * Kiefer Sutherland as Jack Bauer
Six Feet Under * HBO * Peter Krause as Nate Fisher
The Shield * HBO * Michael Chiklis as Detective Vic Mackey
Law & Order: Criminal Intent * NBC * Vincent D’Onofrio as Detective Robert Goren
The Wire * HBO * Dominic West as Jimmy McNulty

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series
Everybody Loves Raymond * CBS * Patricia Heaton as Debra Barone
Malcolm in the Middle * Fox * Jane Kaczmarek as Lois
Desperate Housewives * ABC * Felicity Huffman as Lynette Scavo
Desperate Housewives * ABC * Marcia Cross as Bree Van De Camp
Desperate Housewives * ABC * Teri Hatcher as Susan Mayer
Desperate Housewives * ABC * Eva Longoria as Gabrielle Solis
Will & Grace * NBC * Debra Messing as Grace Adler
Curb Your Enthusiasm * HBO * Cheryl Hines as Cheryl David
Fat Actress * Showtime * Kirstie Alley as Kirstie Alley

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series
Alias * ABC * Jennifer Garner as Sydney Bristow
Law & Order: Special Victims Unit * NBC * Mariska Hargitay as Detective Olivia Benson
Six Feet Under * HBO * Frances Conroy as Ruth Fisher
The Shield * FX * Glenn Close as Capt. Monica Rawling
Medium * NBC * Patricia Arquette as Allison Dubois
Deadwood * HBO * Molly Parker as Alma Garret
Battlestar Galactica * SciFi * Mary McDonnell as President Laura Roslin
Six Feet Under * HBO * Lauren Ambrose as Claire Fisher
Veronica Mars * UPN * Kristen Bell as Veronica Mars

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series
Arrested Development * Fox * Jeffrey Tambor as George Bluth Sr.
Everybody Loves Raymond * CBS * Brad Garrett as Robert Barone
Everybody Loves Raymond * CBS * Peter Boyle as Frank Barone
Entourage * HBO * Jeremy Piven as Ari
Will & Grace * NBC * Sean Hayes as Jack
Arrested Development * Fox * David Cross as Tobias Funke
Arrested Development * Fox * Will Arnett as Gob Bluth
Malcolm in the Middle * Fox * Bryan Cranston as Hal

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series
Boston Legal * ABC * William Shatner as Denny Crane
Huff * Showtime * Oliver Platt as Russell Tupper
Lost * ABC * Naveen Andrews as Sayid Jarrah
Lost * ABC * Terry O’Quinn as John Locke
The West Wing * NBC * Alan Alda as Sen. Arnold Vinick
Six Feet Under * HBO * Michael C. Hall as David Fisher
Veronica Mars * UPN * Enrico Colantoni as Keith Mars
The Wire * HBO * Idris Elba as Russell “Stringer” Bell

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series
Everybody Loves Raymond * CBS * Doris Roberts as Marie Barone
Arrested Development * Fox * Jessica Walter as Lucille Bluth
Two and a Half Men * CBS * Holland Taylor as Evelyn Harper
Two and a Half Men * CBS * Conchata Ferrell as Berta
Will & Grace * NBC * Megan Mullally as Karen
Arrested Development * Fox * Portia de Rossi as Lindsay Funke
Joey * NBC * Jennifer Coolidge as Bobbie
Scrubs * NBC * Sarah Chalke as Elliot Reid

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series
Grey’s Anatomy * ABC * Sandra Oh as Cristina Yang
Huff * Showtime * Blythe Danner as Izzy Huffstodt
Judging Amy * CBS * Tyne Daly as Maxine Gray
The Shield * FX * CCH Pounder as Detective Claudette Wyms
The West Wing * NBC * Stockard Channing as Dr. Abigail Bartlet
Six Feet Under * HBO * Rachel Griffiths as Brenda Fisher
Deadwood * HBO * Paula Malcomson as Trixie
Battlestar Galactica * SciFi * Katee Sackhoff as Lt. Kara Thrace (“Starbuck”)

Outstanding Miniseries
Elvis * CBS
Empire Falls * HBO
The 4400 * USA
The Lost Prince (Masterpiece Theatre) * PBS
Revelations * NBC

Outstanding Variety, Music or Comedy Series
Da Ali G Show * HBO
The Daily Show With Jon Stewart * Comedy Central
Late Night With Conan O’Brien * NBC
Late Show With David Letterman * CBS
Real Time With Bill Maher * HBO
The Tonight Show With Jay Leno * NBC
The Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson * NBC

Outstanding Animated Program (For Programming Less than One Hour)
Futurama * The Sting * Fox
Samurai Jack * Cartoon Network
The Simpsons * Fox
South Park * Comedy Central
SpongeBob SquarePants * Nickelodeon
“Drawn Together” * Comedy Central
Aqua Teen Hunger Force * Cartoon Network

Outstanding Reality Program
Antiques Roadshow * PBS
Extreme Makeover: Home Edition * ABC
Penn & Teller: Bullshit! * Showtime
Project Greenlight * HBO
Queer Eye for the Straight Guy * Bravo
Real World: Philadelphia * MTV
Newlyweds * MTV
Super Sweet Sixteen * MTV

Outstanding Reality-Competition Program
The Amazing Race * CBS
American Idol * Fox
The Apprentice * NBC
Project Runway * Bravo
Survivor * CBS
America’s Next Top Model * UPN
Dancing With the Stars * ABC
The Swan * Fox

Worst show on television
The Swan * Fox
24 * Fox
Britney and Kevin: Chaotic * UPN
The Simple Life 3: Interns * Fox
Laguna Beach * MTV
Two and a Half Men * CBS
Carnivale * HBO
Yes, Dear * CBS
7th Heaven * WB

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Friday, Jun 1, 2001 5:08 PM UTC

The sizzling sleepers of summer

Forget "The Mummy Returns" and "Pearl Harbor": Here are the season's most scorching movies.

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The sizzling sleepers of summer

As the mainstream press promotes “The Mummy Returns,” “Pearl Harbor” and the other vacuous, shrieking offspring from its news-tainment corporate parents, a more skeptical part of the audience has quietly been taking in more adventurous sorts of films. Below, Salon’s critics take a look (in some cases a second look) at the season’s most compelling, if less hyped, films: “The Circle,” “With a Friend Like Harry,” “Under the Sand,” “Memento” and “Amores Perros.”

“Amores Perros”
Directed by Alejandro González Iñárritu
Starring Emilio Echevarría, Gael García Bernal, Goya Toledo, Alvaro Guerrero, Vanessa Bauche

The films of Quentin Tarantino are a blast and a goof — they’re caustic and mischievous, filled with in jokes, self-referentiality, a mordant wit and tour de force imaginations in scene setting. But as time goes on, his movies grow thin. His most memorable contentions — gangsters are stupid, crime is absurd, even that Pam Grier has enormous dignity — in the end are mere reminders of things we know already.

The Mexican film “Amores Perros,” described on a page, sounds like a Tarantino movie. Three or four stories are intertwined by quirks of fate and coincidence but not temporal reality. A gang of thugs sets mastiffs on one another in underground dog fights. A young man tries to run off with his brother’s provocative but noncommittal wife. A cop hires a hit man to kill his brother-in-law. A beautiful model, maimed in a car crash, is forced to look out a window at a giant wall poster of herself in her pre-accident glory.

But “Amores Perros,” which was nominated for best foreign film at this year’s Academy Awards (it lost to “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon”), is really a meditation on some very un-Tarantino-like concepts. Alejandro González Iñárritu, directing Guillermo Arriaga’s script, has other things in mind: His mélange of brotherhood, marriage, murder and dogs is designed to put into relief the experience of a certain perverse segment of humanity as it roils and churns under the pressure of civilization. He sees the breakdown of love and the allure of violence as dehumanizing, rather than the stuff of irony or cheap humor. It separates men and women from their true selves, reduces them to the level of animals.

Such moralizing — though ultimately “Amores Perros” has no moral — would seem trite were it not for the filmic ferocity with which González Iñárritu spits out his tale. The film has been routinely compared to “Traffic,” but that is because the Mexico City milieu here is on the surface similar to the Tijuana the Benicio Del Toro character inhabits in that film. But those “Traffic” scenes were filmed in a washed-out, sere yellow: The world of “Amores Perros” is a supersaturated candy show of lights and hues, designed to contrast all the more starkly with the dark fruits of consequence: blood bubbling blackly out of bullet holes, bruises swelling and sex filling the screen with brown flesh.

The kinetic shocks of the story belie González Iñárritu’s intents here. What turns out to be the second part of a glancing trilogy seems tonally at odds with the first. Halfway through you start feeling disappointed that the director has lost his way. But then you discover that his narrative arcs — and his theme — are much more grand, much more challenging, and the questions he’s asking are bleak ones. Are we men, or animals? Angels, or torturers? Do we marry, or merely mate? Is a dog redeemable? Are humans? And the darkest scene Quentin Tarantino has yet filmed can’t compare to González Iñárritu’s frank admission that he can’t answer any of those questions.

– Bill Wyman

“Under the Sand”
Directed by François Ozon
Starring Charlotte Rampling, Bruno Cremer, Jacques Nolot, Alexandra Stewart

For any fan of ’70s fringe cinema, the presence of the legendary Charlotte Rampling, once the star of the kinky softcore art film “The Night Porter” (not to mention Luchino Visconti’s “The Damned” and the killer-whale classic “Orca”), will be more than enough reason to see “Under the Sand.” But writer-director François Ozon has more to offer than Rampling, still smashing at 56, in an array of conservative but impeccably tailored Parisian fashions (and, yes, out of them too). This is an existential or perhaps mystical tale about a woman whose husband simply vanishes off the beach one summer day, told in muted, matter-of-fact terms that make it, in its gradual buildup of brooding power, seem more haunted rather than less.

As a meditation on loss, “Under the Sand” might well remind you of Krzysztof Kieslowski’s “Blue,” and as an exploration of a devastating disappearance it sometimes suggests George Sluizer’s “The Vanishing.” As a tale of strange events at a French summer house, it even has faint echoes of another 2001 art-house hit, “With a Friend Like Harry.” But its unsettling realism, coupled with Rampling’s performance as Marie, an English teacher in Paris who seems precariously balanced on the edge of sanity, gives it a humane bitterness that’s all its own.

Ozon is a connoisseur of the silences and empty, apparently meaningless moments that make up most of our lives. With its absence of chatter and stylistic game playing, its contemplative focus on the human face and the unglamorous details of bourgeois existence, “Under the Sand” clearly belongs to what’s been called the “New New Wave” of French cinema. But Ozon also reminds us how much this new tradition owes to older ones: He can make a scene in which a woman wants to remove a slipcover from a sofa, or a man discovers a nest of ants under a rotting log, seem redolent with meaning in the manner of Robert Bresson or Ingmar Bergman.

– Andrew O’Hehir

“The Circle”
Directed by Jafar Panahi
Starring Maryam Parvin Almani, Nargess Mamizadeh, Fereshteh Sadr Orafai

In “The Circle,” Iranian director Jafar Panahi shows a level of empathy (if not of artfulness) for characters in the lowest rung of his society that has won him comparisons to the great neorealist films of Vittorio De Sica. That’s the tradition many critics have cited not just for Panahi but for much contemporary Iranian cinema. In the case of “The Circle,” I’d like to suggest a less obvious, and less reputable, comparison: the muckracking melodramas that Warner Bros. turned out in the 1930s.

The names of those movies told the story: “I Am a Fugitive From a Chain Gang,” “20,000 Years in Sing Sing,” “Each Dawn I Die.” “The Circle” isn’t that blunt. It’s an elliptical movie, blending naturalism and stylization as it proceeds from one female character to the next. But in its quieter way, it’s fueled by a similar sense of outrage — in this case, outrage at the treatment of women in a fundamentalist theocracy.

The characters have all committed various transgressions: A woman is afraid to tell her pregnant daughter’s in-laws that she has given birth to a girl instead of the expected male; a group of women recently released from prison act as if they are still prisoners as they dodge police roundups on the street; a mother tries to abandon the daughter she can’t provide for; a prostitute is picked up by the police while johns are allowed to go free. Panahi’s implicit message is that their greatest transgression is being female.

It’s no surprise that “The Circle” attracted the ire of Iranian officials. And Panahi has been criticized for catering to a “Western” view of the country. When my colleague Stephanie Zacharek praised the movie a few weeks back she received e-mail from irate Iranians saying she had fallen for Panahi’s lies. I’d love to know how they square that position with the story the news wires recently reported about an Iranian court ordering a woman stoned to death because she had appeared in porn films.

There’s no violence at all in “The Circle” but something much more unsettling: the constant threat of it. Panahi never resolves the tension that hangs over the movie. That’s the state, both literal and figurative, his women live in, and for the 90 minutes of “The Circle,” so do we.

– Charles Taylor

“With a Friend Like Harry”
Directed by Dominik Moll
Starring Laurent Lucas, Sergi Lopez, Mathilde Seigner, Sophie Guillemin

If David Lynch had a French half-brother he might have made “With a Friend Like Harry.” It’s a strangely colored macabre thriller, directed by Dominik Moll and written by Gilles Marchand and Moll. The story is about a well-to-do guy, Harry (Sergi Lopez), who insinuates himself and his girlfriend, Plum (Sophie Guillemin), into the lives of a middle-class family — Michel, his wife, Claire, and their three little daughters — after the two men meet in a roadside men’s room. Harry’s apparent motive is to help his old pal Michel, with whom he claims to have gone to high school. (Michel never really remembers Harry.)

Harry begins trying to solve Michel’s problems. The family’s car breaks down, so Harry buys them a new SUV. He offers to drive Claire home from grocery shopping in his Mercedes. He urges Michel to write again, as he did in high school.

And then things get weird. The plot twists that follow are Hitchcockian, but these are less intrinsic to the movie’s intents than the bizarre moments and intermittent disturbing humor. Harry tells Michel that he must eat an egg yolk after each orgasm; he himself does so in the summer house’s kitchen at odd hours of the night. There is another bathroom, this one shocking pink, that becomes central to the story. A surreal poem about monkeys makes one suspect that the French really are different from everyone else.

I think they are, and this film is like a minivacation to France — one in which you can hang with strange people for a couple of hours, laugh at and with them and be glad that you don’t have a friend like Harry. Morals of the movie: SUVs can make your life easier, especially if they have air conditioning. And: If you meet someone in a rest stop men’s room, don’t let him come to your house.

– Karen Croft

“Memento”
Directed by Christopher Nolan
Starring Guy Pearce, Carrie-Anne Moss, Joe Pantoliano

In the end, “Memento” is all about structure — you can essentially determine if you’re going to like the cold, blue detective tale in the first 15 minutes. If you’re going to be impressed by a plot that unfolds backward — the movie starts with a climactic murder and works toward the circumstances that led to the killing — you’re going to like it.

Christopher Nolan’s movie swings on a gimmick, sure, but it’s a good one. If you don’t like gimmicks, there’s not a lot left, other than some confusing, po-mo theory about the nature of memory and its relationship to reality.

Guy Pearce, who played second fiddle to Russell Crowe in “L.A. Confidential,” plays Leonard, a former insurance investigator who lost his short-term memory in an assault that happened at the same time his wife was raped and murdered. He wants to avenge his wife, but having to essentially start over every 15 minutes is a difficult handicap.

In order to navigate his world of seedy bars, chain motels and bland commercial roads, to build a case against the killer, he annotates Polaroids and uses extensive note taking and, in extreme circumstances, tattoos to remind him of the most important truths. Along the way, he’s either helped or hindered by Carrie-Anne Moss, playing femme fatale Natalie, and Joe Pantoliano as the chummy Teddy.

The critics were mixed about the film, but audiences have been a little more responsive, intrigued by the word of mouth — it’s one of those movies that you have to talk about as soon as the credits roll. After 11 weeks, it has grossed nearly $15 million, and is just now hitting the Top 10 in box-office receipts.

You can be charitable and note that “Memento” never takes its audience’s intelligence for granted. It expects you to figure it out and fill in its holes. The less charitable view is that its backward storytelling is just confusing and the device masks at least one big hole and a fall-from-the-sky revelation that comes toward the end of the picture.

At least, that’s the way I remember it.

– Jeff Stark

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