I was interested that the president said he discussed the subject of same-sex marriage with his daughters. Their acceptance of the same-sex parents of some of their classmates was so automatic and total that their very ease convinced him that same-sex marriage was inevitable — and a good thing. Which shows something that anthropologists have known a long time: That innovative behavior comes from children, is passed to their mothers and recognized by their fathers last of all. This rule of innovation holds true throughout the primate world.

In our polarized country I fear that the president’s endorsement of gay marriage will be seized on by the religious right as yet another sign of his Godlessness. But religion, most Americans feel, must evolve too; the Bible must be open to contemporary interpretations, just as the Constitution is. Although Dan Savage stirred up some hostility with his recent contention that the Bible has to be reinterpreted for each generation, he made a strong case that we should no more honor Old Testament taboos of homosexuality than in its explicit endorsement of slavery.

As a man in his 70s, I grew up in an era when homosexuality was still an offense in some states punishable by death. The stigma of being gay drove my age-mates and me toward drink, suicide and years on the psychoanalytic couch in an effort to go straight. We were wracked with self-hatred, which blighted so many lives of our friends.

Same-sex marriage is a balm to the soul whether it’s an option that an individual embraces or not. The idea that our relationships could be normalized is such a happy sign for those of us who grew up feeling alienated from society and like second-class citizens. The battle is not yet won, but the president’s stand points the way toward success.

Edmund White was born in Cincinnati in 1940 and has lived in France, Rome, and New York City, where he resides today. He is an officer of the Ordre des Arts et des Lettres and teaches at Princeton University.

His extensive writing career includes an autobiographical trilogy of novels, a collection of short stories, and a critically acclaimed biography of Jean Genet, and a travel book about gay America, “States of Desire.” He is a cultural critic and co-author of “The Joy of Gay Sex: An Intimate Guide for Gay Men to the Pleasures of a Gay Life” with Dr. Charles Silverstein.

In “The Married Man,” (Knopf) Austin and Julien dash between bohemian suppers and sophisticated salons but when Julien develops AIDS their quest to save health and happiness pushes their love to its ultimate crisis. Hear Edmund White read from this poetic and moving work.

“Edmund White’s ‘The Married Man’ is one of the most powerful, candid, devastating and moving novels I’ve read in recent years. It is both beautifully written and unsparing in its honesty.” –Joyce Carol Oates