Afternoon Briefing:
OK, one last Golden Globes moment before we move on to the next awards show: Since no one else mentioned it, my favorite moment was when “The Office” won for best comedy television series and the co-creator and star, Ricky Gervais, got up to accept. Obviously an inherently witty man, he seemed genuinely surprised at the win. He ended by quipping, “I’m not from these parts … I’m from a little place called England. We used to run the world before you.” (BBC)
Fidel Castro and the Sundance Kid: Robert Redford was in Cuba over the weekend for a screening of “The Motorcycle Diaries” — a film he produced about Che Guevara — and got a surprise visit from Castro at the Hotel Nacional. Seems this is their second date; Redford went scuba diving with Fidel in 1988. (Reuters)
They get the rings: In a nice ending to the “Lord of the Rings” trilogy, both Elijah Wood and Andy Serkis were given the rings used in the film to take home with them. Director Peter Jackson divvied up the loot and everyone lived happily ever after. (UPI)
Presidential groupies? There’s a fight going on between Web sites — a cleavage-filled BabesAgainstBush and a self-described “cute” (no cleavage in sight) BabesForBush version. Whether you are a Bushie or not, let’s try to keep the word “sexy” and the name George W. Bush in separate sentences, OK? A sensitive electorate can only take so much. (U.S. News.com)
Two greats left us over the weekend: Photographer Helmut Newton, 83, died in a way that seems as if he planned it for effect. The king of kink crashed his Cadillac near the Chateau Marmont in Los Angeles. (British Vogue) And Billy May, arranger of swinging standards in the ’50s, died of a heart attack at 87. Frank Sinatra said, “Recording with Billy May is like having a bucket of cold water thrown in your face.” And he meant it in a good way. (Washington Post)
— Karen Croft
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As the criticism of Mel Gibson’s not-yet-released movie “The Passion of the Christ” mounts — Anti-Defamation League director Abraham H. Foxman asked in Friday’s New York Times, “Will it strengthen and legitimize anti-Semitic feelings?” before answering: “Yes, it will” — Gibson shouldn’t be surprised. Regardless of whether “The Passion” is offensive, history shows that biblical depictions on film have, historically, usually led to holy outrage. A few notable highlights from the past:
1916: “Intolerance” Director D.W. Griffith is forced to reshoot the scene in which Jesus is crucified in response to complaints from the Jewish organization B’nai B’rith that Jews were depicted poorly.
1923: “The Ten Commandments” Audiences are alarmed by the orgies and sex and danger in this biblical story, which includes a wildly debauched golden calf scene, though no actual nudity. Director Cecil B. DeMille takes pains to depict the punishment of the sinners, but only after they’ve had their fun.
1927: “The King of Kings” Another DeMille scorcher — Jacqueline Logan discomfited primmer audiences by dressing particularly provocatively (for the time, at least) as Mary Magdalene.
1932: “The Sign of the Cross” DeMille again. Includes a titillating scene in which Claudette Colbert bathes naked (well, OK, she’s not actually naked) in ass’s milk. The director insists that he’s depicting on-screen wantonness merely “to demonstrate the biblical triumph of virtue over temptation.” But a group called the new Legion of Decency that rates films for Catholic viewers and for the industry objects — and the Hays Code is born, leading to a dearth of Hollywood Bible flicks for the next 15 years, then to a string of uncontroversial, church-approved fare like “I Beheld His Glory” (1952), “Day of Triumph” (1954) and “The Power of Resurrection” (1958).
1959: “Ben-Hur” Although the film garnered a record 11 Academy Awards, controversy eventually caught up with the cast and crew when screenwriter Gore Vidal claimed he had written into the script a scene filled with homosexual innuendo — without star Charlton Heston knowing about it. The rumor, which has resurfaced repeatedly over the years, was blasted by Heston in a 1996 letter to the Los Angeles Times, in which he said that the suggestion of gay overtones in the film “irritates the hell out of me.”
1961: “King of Kings” This version, directed by Nicholas Ray, didn’t cause much of an uproar, but its Jesus, a dashing blond Jeffrey Hunter, inspired film wags to derisively dub it “I Was a Teenage Jesus.”
1977: “Jesus of Nazareth” This NBC two-parter, directed by Franco Zeffirelli, stirred up much controversy before it aired on Palm Sunday and Easter. General Motors pulled its sponsorship after the religious right, spooked by Zeffirelli’s comment that one of his goals was to portray Jesus as a normal guy, threatened a boycott. NBC gathered support by screening the film for other religious leaders and eventually aired it to impressive ratings and reviews.
1979: “Mary and Joseph: A Story of Faith” NBC proves itself either brave or a glutton for punishment with this Christmas season TV presentation, which raised the ire of two Catholic priests. Labeling it “anti-Christian,” they apparently objected to the fact that it portrayed Joseph as a murderous zealot and Mary as “ill-tempered” and “strong-willed.”
1979: “Life of Brian” Some people thought this Monty Python religious satire about a reluctant “savior” born in a manger down the street from Jesus was among the funniest films of all time — but others, including many religious leaders, were offended. The Roman Catholic Archdiocese of New York called it blasphemous, bigoted and “a crime.”
1985: “Hail Mary” Jean-Luc Godard didn’t make a lot of friends by depicting Mary as a hoop-shooting gas station attendant, Joseph as a taxi driver, and the angel Gabriel as kind of a shabby guy. Its release in Italy raised such ire — Pope John Paul II called it blasphemous — that Godard asked the Italian distributor to pull it from theaters. Later that year, “Hail Mary” won a prize from the International Catholic Cinema Office at the Berlin Film Festival, but that may have been more a result of the controversy surrounding the film than its quality, which critics have impugned.
1985: “King David” With Richard Gere in the starring role, this flick portrayed King David as a guy who grows old and bitter and eventually frees himself from the shackles of his religious beliefs, abandoning his faith in God. Audiences voted with their feet (and their wallets), and the film, which cost almost $30 million to make, drew only about $5 million at the box office.
1988: “The Last Temptation of Christ” The mother of all religious-movie protests. Martin Scorsese got death threats for this movie, based on the book by Nikos Kazantzakis, which includes a dream sequence in which Jesus is shown having sex with Mary Magdalene. Before the film was released, religious leaders angrily denounced it (many without having seen it) and 25,000 demonstrators protested outside Universal Pictures. One fundamentalist even staged a reenactment of Jesus’ crucifixion outside studio bigwig Lew Wasserman’s home, in which an actor portrayed Wasserman himself nailing Jesus to the cross.
1999: “Dogma” Alanis Morissette plays God. Chris Rock is one of the apostles. Director Kevin Smith said he got scads of hate mail and bomb threats for his satirical take on Christianity before the movie was released — along with a note from Scorsese saying, “Get ready to spend a lot of time indoors” — but that the protests all stopped as soon as the film came out. “It wasn’t at all what people had imagined,” Smith recently told a Canadian newspaper. “In fact, the dude who did the protests [Catholic League leader William Donahue] actually invited me out to have a beer after making my life hell for six months.”
– Reported by Christopher Farah
Morning Briefing:
Bye-bye, Babs: Barbara Walters has announced that she’ll leave her role as co-host and chief correspondent of ABC’s “20/20″ in September after 25 years on the job. (ABC News)
Move over, Paris: Has the world been waiting for a Dr. J sex tape? Probably not, but someone has just seen fit to make public a video of basketball legend Julius Erving sinking more than a three-pointer. (N.Y. Post)
Get ready for Dennis: Dennis Miller’s CNBC show kicks off tonight, and he’s giving us all a taste of what’s to come, vowing to be really, really nice to President Bush: “I like him. I’m going to give him a pass. I take care of my friends.” (Associated Press)
Money Quotes:
A few good ones from last night’s Golden Globes:
Mary-Louise Parker, picking up her best supporting actress award for her work on “Angels in America”: “Janel Maloney [Parker's former "West Wing" co-star] told me she’d pay me $1,000 if I thanked my newborn son for making my boobs look so good in this dress. Get out your checkbook!”
Meryl Streep, who won a best actress award for “Angels in America”: “I just want to say that I don’t think the two biggest problems in America are that too many people want to commit their lives to one another till death do us part, and steroids and sports. I don’t think those are our two biggest problems.”
Charlize Theron, who won a best actress award for her work in “Monster”: “I’m from a farm in South Africa. This is insane!”
“Lord of the Rings” director Peter Jackson, picking up his best director award: “I never realized that seven years on this movie would turn me into a hobbit.”
Michael Douglas, accepting his honorary Cecil B. DeMille award from his “Basic Instinct” costar Sharon Stone: “Sharon, thank you for those kind words and those nine days in bed in ’91.”
–Amy Reiter
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Afternoon Briefing:
Sorry, Silvio, but Marcello Mastroianni you’re not: Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi is rumored to have had plastic surgery to tighten things up around the eyes. (Reuters)
The tabloids will be sizzling: Looks like Prince Charles will be questioned this summer about conspiracy theories that have him plotting to kill Princess Diana. (Sky.com)
Lucy was turning over in her grave: NBC ran an ad for the last season of “Friends,” calling it “The best comedy ever,” but then thought better of the hyperbole and pulled the spot. Now, if they had said “Comedy with the best hair” that would have been more accurate. (CNN)
Fair trial for Martha? Maybe if they held it in Mongolia or some other place where people aren’t divided into two camps — those who want Ms. Stewart skewered and those who want to move in with her and make cookies together. Evidence that finding unbiased jurors is going to be harder than making puff pastry: This week when a juror was excused she said to Martha: “I am a huge fan of yours. Good luck.” (AP)
Harvey, babe, take a chill pill: Reports are that whenever Miramax mogul Harvey Weinstein gets wind of someone working on a story about him he tries to bribe them off the case by offering a book deal. Supposedly, this happened to Peter Biskind, Ken Auletta and Keith Kelly — who all declined the offers, thank you. What’s the big guy so afraid of? (Women’s Wear Daily)
–Karen Croft
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Morning Briefing
Bennifer no more: It’s official: Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck have broken up. The split is said to have been mutual and has been confirmed by Lopez’s spokesperson, who said: “Jennifer Lopez has ended her engagement to Ben Affleck. At this difficult time, we ask that you respect her privacy.” (Us magazine)
Bad news for Rush: Prosecutors in Florida have turned down a deal requested by Rush Limbaugh’s lawyers in which he would have gotten probation, drug treatment and testing without pleading guilty to a felony for “doctor shopping.” Limbaugh’s attorney wrote in his plea request: “I believe this proposal would be in keeping with the public interest. The public is better served by treating addicts as patients rather than criminals.” (Associated Press)
Top 10 reasons to go on Letterman: Howard Dean went on David Letterman’s “Late Show” last night to do the Top 10 “Ways I, Howard Dean, Can Turn Things Around.” Among them: “Switch to decaf,” “Start working out and speaking with an Austrian accent,” and “Oh, I don’t know — maybe fewer crazy, red-faced rants?” (Reuters)
–Amy Reiter
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Bonnie Fuller wants what Bonnie Fuller wants! The Wall Street Journal got an inside look at the new editor of Star and found that she’s a bit on the demanding side — asking for things that don’t exist (milk chocolate Mounds) and things that her former boss, Jann Wenner, deemed excessive (a car and driver, plus an expense account for hair styling). But thank god Jann gave her the job at Us magazine. If she hadn’t gotten that gig, word was that she was set to write her memoirs, tentatively titled “From Geek to Oh My Goddess.” (Wall St. Journal)
Bonnie Schmonnie: The late mob boss John Gotti’s daughter, Victoria Gotti, is going to be editor of American Media’s new pub, Red Carpet. Can’t wait to hear what her demands are going to be. Bet it’s not about chocolate. As for a car and driver — she probably has her own already. (USA Today)
Speaking of tabloid fodder, how about Sextrology? A book due out in February by the authors Starsky and Cox (who did the astrology column in Teen People for five years) will tell all about which signs make for chemistry. The New York Observer asked the stargazers about “Sex and the City” star Sarah Jessica Parker and her cute-as-a-button hubby, Matthew Broderick. The verdict: “They’re friends who fuck.” (N.Y. Observer)
Nothing wins like bad TV: Last night Fox won the ratings race big time with a one-two shlock punch of bad singing with “American Idol” and bad romance with “My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiancé.” ABC, which took the high road with the broadcast of “Meet the Parents,” came in last. (Reuters)
Young adults say the dumbest things: A 21-year-old joked to an airport security person that she was taking a bomb onboard a British Airways flight from Miami to London. To her rescue came Virgin Atlantic Airline’s founder, Richard Branson, who offered flights to get the gal out of her plight. Said a Virgin spokesperson, “Young people do say stupid things from time to time.” (Ananova)
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Afternoon Briefing:
Award season begins now: Amid the political races and the run-up to Oscar fever, the movie awards are starting to be announced. The early winner is “The Lord of the Rings” — named today as best picture by the 45-member Chicago Film Critics Association. The big-shouldered reviewers also loved Charlize Theron in “Monster” and Bill Murray in “Lost in Translation.” (Reuters)
Life imitates art: Sean Connery, in a real-life scenario right out of “Lost in Translation,” will shun his vodka martini and appear in ads for Dewar’s scotch. The campaign is based on the phrase “Some age, others mature.” Unfortunately, TV viewers in the U.S. and Britain won’t have the pleasure — they’ll have to go to Venezuela, Greece or Russia to see Bond imbibe. (BBC)
The bloviator comes to the City by the Bay: Director James Cameron (aka King of the World) is hinting strongly that he’s going to come to San Francisco to “play” with the digital genius gnomes who populate the area for his next film. He is being coy about details, except to say it’ll be science fiction. (SciFiWire)
Movies online: If slogging through the slush and then standing in a movie line in front of someone who is coughing down your neck isn’t your idea of a good date, check out this idea: As of today, AOL is offering subscribers the chance to download and watch a first-run movie once, for 99 cents. You have 30 days to get to the viewing, and movies available include “Finding Nemo,” “The Hulk,” The Matrix Reloaded” and “Pirates of the Caribbean.” Pretty soon your computer will make popcorn, and then life will be perfect. (IMDB)
Money Quote:
Why do actors speak more openly to German magazines? This time it’s Ben Affleck on the size of his noggin: “I’ve got a lot of physical flaws, for example a huge head. Have you ever seen the statues on Easter Island?” (Ananova)
–Karen Croft
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If things weren’t bad enough for Howard Dean after the fiasco in Iowa, now comes news that he doesn’t even enjoy the support of the other Howard Dean.
A few weeks back, Salon debunked a growing (wishful?) rumor among Deaniacs that the presidential hopeful had a small speaking part in 1984′s “Ninja III: The Domination,” starring ninja legend Sho Kosugi.
But the “Howard Dean” who plays a cop in the cheesy ninja click confirmed to Salon that he’s not that Howard Dean, and — in a recent telephone call — showed a shocking lack of loyalty to his political namesake:
You were in “Ninja III: The Domination”?
Yeah, that was my stellar acting performance.
And you’re the policeman in the chopper?
No, I’m actually another policeman. A lot of it ended up on the cutting room floor. I had some close-ups, some lines: “You take this squad over there,” that kind of thing. What ended up in the movie was: “Hold your fire. Don’t hit that chopper.”
How’d you get the part?
I’m a stand-up [comedian]. I was in a club in Phoenix near where the movie was shot, and a big part of my act was ninja movies. I’d act out an entire movie in 60 seconds, the scenes where all the ninjas would attack Sho [Kosugi] from every direction. I get off the stage, and there he is: Sho Kosugi, with the director [Sam Firstenberg of "Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo" fame]. They said, “You’re very funny. We really like you. Would you like to be in the movie?”
And you’re not former Vermont Gov. Howard Dean?
I’ve been getting calls from newspaper reporters since he announced he was going to run for president. I tell people I’m the good Howard Dean.
Hmmm. So who are you supporting this year?
G.W. [Bush.]
– John Gorenfeld
Morning Briefing:
Next time you toke up in your limo, Art, tell your driver not to speed: Art Garfunkel was arrested for drug possession in upstate New York on Saturday after police pulled his driver over for speeding, smelled pot in the car and found some in the right pocket of the musician’s jacket. Garfunkel was said to have “identified himself as a celebrity,” but his arresting officer was apparently unimpressed. (Kingston Daily Freeman)
Sad sack First twin Barbara Bush has failed to be “tapped” to join notorious Yale secret society Skull & Bones, despite the fact that her father, grandfather and great-grandfather were members. “Sadly, her contribution to campus life has been lacking,” reported the London Telegraph, adding that Bush will join the Yale Potato Sack Relay Team instead. (N.Y. Post)
Drinks were spilled: Paris Hilton’s honor defended by ex-boybander Lance Bass, who deliberately jostled the heiress’s amateur porn partner Rick Solomon at Sundance party. (N.Y. Post)
And speaking of surprise attacks and spilled drinks: Von Bondies singer Jason Stollsteimer says he was totally blindsided by attack by White Stripes frontman Jack White in that bar fight they got into in December in Detroit, also says he may have permanent eye damage as a result of the scuffle. (Launch Radio Networks)
Queer eye for the straight general: Wesley Clark gives interview to the Advocate, says “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” is a faulty system. Adds: “The armed forces are the last institution in America that discriminates against people. It ought to be the first that doesn’t. They [gay people in the military] ought to have the right to be who they are. They shouldn’t have to conceal their identities.” (The Advocate)
Money Quote:
Peggy Noonan writing on the Vatican’s recent denial that, after seeing Mel Gibson’s “The Passion,” the pope said, “It is as it was,” as she reported back in December: “Believe me, it is painful to be accused however implicitly of being the accessory to a lie. And it would grieve me more than I can say to have been part of wrongly attributing an important statement to a great pope who is for me a personal hero.” (WSJ’s Opinion Journal)
–Amy Reiter
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Afternoon Briefing:
Clark fires first: While everyone is still deconstructing the Howard Dean post-caucus speech, the duel of the military records has begun between Clark and Kerry, with the general saying, “It’s one thing to be a hero as a junior officer. He’s done that, I respect that, but I’ve got the military experience at the top as well as at the bottom.” (Yahoo)
Martha’s stylish perp walk: Looking chic in brown and gray, The Martha made her way through the slush to the courtroom today to plead “not guilty” while a fan stood outside dressed in a chef’s hat and matching apron. (AP)
Paris Hilton Boulevard? Yep. And it intersects with Nicole Richie Avenue in Altus, Ark. (pop. 800).
The end of the punk world as we know it: It’s bad enough that Paris Hilton has a street named after her, but what about John Lydon (aka Johnny Rotten) starring in a reality show called “I’m a Celebritiy … Get Me Out of Here!” on British TV. A journalist who knows the punk star said, “I’m gobsmacked.” Aren’t we all? (BBC)
Counter programming at its best: NBC will air three episodes of “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” on Feb. 1 opposite CBS’s broadcast of the Super Bowl. (UPI)
Money Quote:
CBS CEO Les Moonves was talking about a planned reality show about Amish teens who are allowed to socialize without adult supervision before deciding whether to commit to the church. When asked about the rural lobbying effort to stop his 2001 reality show based on “The Beverly Hillbillies,” he said: “The Amish don’t have quite as good a lobbying effort.” (San Diego Union)
— Karen Croft
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That national car wreck none of us can look away from — Michael Jackson — continues to dominate much of the media. And so has his rather unfortunate sobriquet: Wacko Jacko. But who deserves credit for coming up with the nickname that finally stuck?
Through our exhaustive research efforts, we believe we traced the first reference to “Jacko” back to Australia. On Aug. 7, 1986, the (Brisbane, Australia) Courier-Mail ran 1,040 words by one Tim Ward about the so-called King of Pop’s world-conquering plans post-”Thriller” under the headline “IS JACKO WACKO?”: “The Howard Hughes of pop … the rock recluse … wacko Jacko …” Ward mused. “But how much of it, if any, is part of his image?”
The phrase soon spread to the mother country, and on Sept. 12, 1987, shortly after the release of Jackson’s album “Bad,” Robert Hilburn wrote — from London — in the Los Angeles Times that Jackson’s “much-publicized eccentricities have caused writers here to dub him ‘Wacko Jacko.’”
Wherever its origins, the “Wacko Jacko” label — and its rarer offshoots such as “Whacko Jacko,” “Jacko-in-the-Box” and “Cracko Jacko” — was in such wide use by October 1987 that Jackson, according to Australia’s Herald newspaper, issued an “impassioned plea to critics” asking them to “lay off the ‘Wacko Jacko’” stuff. “Jackson says he cries ‘very, very often’ because of the attacks,” reported the Herald.
Alas, Jackson’s pleas have gone unheard, his tears undried. Here are just a few of the headlines about Jackson that have run in the New York Post — owned since 1993 by Aussie tabloidman Rupert Murdoch, of course — in the last few years:
LAWYERS WANT JACKO WRAPO
WE DIDN’T SMACKO JACKO, SAY CALIF. COPS
CANCELED JACKO BACK ON TRACKO
JACKO NO-GO
LISA MARIE: JACKO A SACKO WACKO
TURNING JACKO-NESE
JACKO BACKO FROM HOSPITAL
AFRO JACKO GOES RETRO
SMACKO FOR JACKO: MUST PAY $5M TO PROMOTER
ALARMING TALE OF JACKO IN THE SACKO
SICKO JACKO EXPOS — ’93 PAPERS BARE KID’S ‘SEX TRYST’ NIGHTMARE
I’VE BEEN HI-JACKO-ED: MICHAEL: ‘UNFAIR’ SHOW BETRAYED ME
WACKO JACKO’S MOJO RISING
JACKO KOS NOSE WOES: FACE IN PLACE AFTER BIZARRE COURT SCENE
PROMOTER: JACKO IS A JERK-O
JACKO GOT OFF-TRACKO, REV. AL SAYS
REV. AL TAKES A WHACKO AT JACKO
JACKO ON ATTACKO — GLOVED ONE GETS ANGRY ON BIZARRE BUS TOUR
KING OF FLOP: JACKO FALLS AND BREAKS ANKLE AT HOME
PROF. JACKO LECTURES ON KIDS TOMORROW AT OXFORD
BRO, NO! TOUR MIGHT BE THE JACKO-LESS 5
JACKO WANTS STOLEN HOME VIDEOS BACKO
SPLITSO FOR JACKO
BONDS COULD RAISE $100M T0 BACKO JACKO
Morning Briefing:
Not as it was? Pope John Paul II backs away from Gibson film “The Passion,” denies expressing approval. (Catholic News Service via N.Y. Times)
Assault with a deadly clicker Aaron and Nick Carter’s mother arrested for allegedly beating her husband’s girlfriend with a remote control. (UPI)
What does Graydon Carter want for Christmas? Someone has compiled a list — with links — of celebrities’ Amazon “wish lists.” True? Who knows? But they make for good clicking. (Gawker)
— Amy Reiter
With reporting by Christopher Farah
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Afternoon Briefing:
Will Alec Baldwin play Halston? Rumors are that Alec is preparing to play the late, gay fashion designer to the stars, who died of AIDS. Baldwin is already losing weight and preparing himself for “a full-blown love scene with a guy.” The mind boggles at who will play Liza, Andy and Bianca … (IMDB)
Where were you when the Beatles arrived? The fab four appeared on “The Ed Sullivan Show” Feb. 9, 1964, and if you were older than about 2 you probably remember the frenzy that one show caused. A group called the Fab 40 Committee has tracked down some unlikely characters from that time, including the Pan Am greeter who met the plane and the woman who played hooky from school that day and showed up at the Plaza Hotel with a sign saying: “Elvis is dead. Long live the Beatles.” (Newsday)
What a surprise! Is anyone shocked that the Republicans have more than three times the amount of money to spend on the upcoming elections than the Democrats? At last count the RNC reported having $33.1 million, the DNC $10 million. Same as it ever was … (AP)
Tom Cruise plays cupid: The megastar Mr. Cruise was in Spain to promote “The Last Samurai,” and a cameraman covering the event shared his story of unrequited love with the actor, who then went on TV and said, “Sonia, you have to marry Joao. He is crying behind the camera.” Reports are that Sonia said yes. (Yahoo)
Money Quote:
After Michael Jackson’s court appearance this morning, during which he pleaded not guilty to charges of child molestation, his handlers passed out invitations to the crowd of fans who had gathered to support Jackson. The invites said: “In the spirit of love and togetherness Michael Jackson would like to invite his fans and supporters to his Neverland ranch. Please join us Jan. 16, 2004, from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. Refreshments will be served. We’ll see you there!” Isn’t how all this started in the first place? (CNN)
–Karen Croft
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He probably won’t chuck a racket at his guests or anything, but fiery former tennis pro John McEnroe has been tapped to host his own TV talk show on CNBC specifically because of his unpredictable displays of emotion.
“He’s a rebel in many ways,” CNBC president Pamela Thomas-Graham told the press this week. “I think that’s fun for our viewers. A lot of our viewers are entrepreneurs and they like that rebellious attitude in him.”
The Fix — ever fair and impartial — has decided to take a wait-and-see attitude. But if McEnroe’s failed attempt at hosting a game show (remember “The Chair” back in 2002? Thought not) isn’t enough to give him pause as he jumps back into prime time, a quick review of some of the celebrities who have (briefly) sallied forth into the world of TV talk before him might:
Magic Johnson, of whose 1998 show, “The Magic Hour,” New York Newsday wrote the following: “I predict that Magic Johnson will have 17 minutes. ‘The Magic Hour’ is nice. He’s nice. The bandleader, Sheila E. is nice. She even employs her brother. You want it to succeed because it is all so nice … [But] Magic is not a comedian. He is not even an entertainer. That would seem to be a couple of strikes against him.”
And Newsday’s review of Magic’s show was, well, nice, compared to the one that ran in the Chicago Tribune: “Even before seeing it, you knew that ‘The Magic Hour’ was an optimistic name for Magic Johnson’s new talk show. About the best producers could ask for, given his past track record as less-than-adept basketball announcer, was ‘The Not Embarrassing Hour, or, ‘At Least Twenty-Five Minutes of Tolerable Competence, Hopefully.’ Two weeks into the run of the show, even those titles seem too much.”
Robert Urich, who in 1997 set the standard for his talk show by singing to Fran “The Nanny” Drescher on the pilot and discussing his motives for hosting the show. He said he’d been “moving and evolving toward” TV chatter for a long time and was motivated by the cancer that took his life in 2002: “When this cancer thing came up I had the opportunity of talking to Diane Sawyer, and after that interview I got 50,000 pieces of mail. These were not postcards, they were 10-page letters from people pouring their hearts out to me like I was a brother. And so I thought maybe I can communicate something in a different way. That’s what I’m hoping for.”
Marilu Henner, whose talk show, “Marilu,” didn’t last long either. But it lasted long enough for her husband, Robert Lieberman, to give this heartbreaking quote to the press: “Marilu has wanted to do a talk show since she was a little girl.”
Chevy Chase, who was so jittery on the “The Chevy Chase Show” back in 1993 that his own guests were commenting on it. “God, he is so nervous, I feel sorry for him,” Dennis Hopper told the Hollywood Reporter after an appearance on the shows. “He picks up a glass and he is shaking … He has to relax.”
Meshach Taylor. The former “Designing Women” costar’s 1998 syndicated talk show got canceled before it even hit the air. Alas, the same cannot be said of the talk show efforts of Roseanne, Howie Mandel, Carnie Wilson, Suzanne Somers, Danny Bonaduce, George Hamilton, Tempestt Bledsoe, Alan Thicke, Kato Kaelin and so, so, so many others.
In fact, in 1987, years after his “Thicke of the Night” crashed and burned so horribly, when he had seemingly recovered and was starring on the successful sitcom “Growing Pains,” Thicke told the press that he was still smarting from the devastating reviews. (“Thicke is worse than boring. He is aggressively boring,” wrote People magazine before the disastrous late-night show was canceled.) The failure was painful, Thicke commented. “It probably always will be.”
Morning Briefing:
Queer chicks for the straight guy? “The L Word,” Showtime’s series about lusty lesbians in love, stars Jennifer Beals and Laurel Holloman and premieres tonight amid lackluster reviews. (USA Today)
Still skinny, but not so young anymore: Kate Moss turns 30, is hailed as an icon. (Vogue U.K.)
Horrible way to go: Olivia Goldsmith, who wrote “The First Wives Club,” has died from a reaction to anesthetic she was given during plastic surgery. (London Evening Standard)
More sad news: Actress and teacher Uta Hagen, who originated the role of Martha in the Broadway production of “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf,” has died at age 84. (Reuters)
Money Quote:
Ahmad Sabki Yusof, a leader of the fundamentalist Pan-Malaysian Islamic Party’s youth wing, which wants Mariah Carey’s show banned from Malaysia for promoting un-Islamic values: “Everyone knows Mariah Carey presents herself in a sexy, unacceptable and almost vulgar manner. She is not an appropriate role model for young Malaysians.” (Associated Press)
–Amy Reiter
With additional reporting by Christopher Farah
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