Stephen Colbert f**king loses it on CNN: Enough with the Joe Biden fan fiction!

"They've got an extra podium just in case Biden drops by! It's basically an open mic night."

Published October 13, 2015 4:01PM (EDT)

It's a lovely time of year, Stephen Colbert reminded us on The Late Show Monday night. The leaves are changing, Chicago Fire is back and CNN is having the first Democratic Debate of the 2016 Presidential Election. There's just one thing they're waiting on: Joe Biden.

Colbert showed a clip of CNN's Jim Acosta who is ready with an extra podium in case Vice President Joe Biden happens to show up in Las Vegas for the CNN Debate at the last minute. "There it is! They've got an extra podium just in case Biden drops by! Like you do. You know. This year's Presidential Debates are basically an open mic night. Could be Joe Biden. It could be Carrot Top."

Imagine how exciting it would be if Biden joined at the last second. It's almost as exciting as Lincoln Chafee is about the metric system. But thanks to the awesome that is CNN, Jim Acosta turned on his patented "if only" machine to rev up the anticipation and excitement of an imaginary Joe Biden entrance. This get's pretty intense, y'all.

Jim Acosta: "Vice President Joe Biden: will he or won't he? Will the Airforce Two suddenly start flying this way, start flying westward toward Las Vegas on Tuesday night in a dramatic landing at McCarran International Airport with a speeding motorcade over to the hotel. Biden with the aviator glasses put on... I can see a situation where he pulls in in that yellow Corvette with the aviators on and says: 'Let's do this thing.' Uhh, it'll be fun to watch. Would be fascinating political television if the Vice President decides to join him."

Wow. OK. That would be fascinating, Jim Acosta. But perhaps the dramatic reading of an imagined event is even better. Plus, CNN has that fancy hologram machine, couldn't they just beam in Joe Biden from other debates? Colbert says this is a great strategy for cable news: "describing things more compelling than what you're watching now. CNN: It could get interesting!"

Colbert then imagines another fantasy where Biden flies in and walks right to a certain CNN reporter he takes out for beers after the debate. "Realizing they have a ton in common before they know it the sun is coming up and they've talked all night."

Check out the hilarious video below:

Too Little, Too Late For Biden?


By Sarah Burris

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2016 Democratic Primary Aol_on Cnn Cnn Debate Elections 2016 Joe Biden Stephen Colbert