Stephen Colbert mocks wearable fitness tech, and takes it to a terrifying new level

"I believe the pain and shame of surrendering your will to an electronic device can go much further"

Published September 9, 2014 1:38PM (EDT)

Stephen Colbert   (Screenshot/The Colbert Report)
Stephen Colbert (Screenshot/The Colbert Report)

On Monday night Stephen Colbert examined the latest trend in wearable fitness tech: the Pavlok. This device shocks you with an electrical jolt if you do not meet your exercise goals.

"If I forget to hit the gym, my Fitbit, here, syncs to my Pebble, which sends a reminder to my iPhone. A reminder I delete with my Google Glass," Colbert explained.

"Repeated nagging messages do not motivate me. If they did, I'd have a LinkedIn account."

But with the Pavlok, you are not just receiving messages. You are shocked in the arm, money is automatically taken from your bank account, and you are publicly shamed on Facebook.

Colbert, however, believes we are not taking the wearable tech trend far enough. "I believe the pain and shame of surrendering your will to an electronic device can go much further," he explained.

Which is why he introduced the Spine Spider. Now this'll get you moving. Watch below:


By Sarah Gray

Sarah Gray is an assistant editor at Salon, focusing on innovation. Follow @sarahhhgray or email sgray@salon.com.

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Related Topics ------------------------------------------

Fitbit Fitness Pavlok Stephen Colbert Technology The Colbert Report Video Wearable Tech