Jon Bowen
Sex, lies and sunglasses
British study shows shades are good for the ego.
Jeepers, creepers, where’d you get those awesome feelings of self-confidence and sex appeal? From your sunglasses, says new research.
Dr. Glenn Wilson, a psychologist at the University of London who has studied the psychological effects of wearing shades, says that wearing sunglasses makes people feel more confident and attractive to the opposite sex.
“They make you feel mysterious, cool,” Wilson says. “There’s an association with the good life that adds to the aura. Hollywood, sports cars, all that.” And the connection to the high life launches your ego into a higher realm of sexual confidence. “People report having additional courage to ogle when their gaze can’t be detected. Sunglasses give us a degree of anonymity, because you can see but not be seen.”
Wilson says people in sunglasses also do things they wouldn’t normally do if their eyes were exposed — sunbathe topless, for example. His research is based on a recent series of focus-group studies in which single-sex groups convened to discuss their attitudes about sunglasses.
According to Wilson’s studies, men and women have different reasons for liking the look of sunglasses on the opposite sex. “In the case of men, there’s a sinister appearance — that lethal power that comes out of the unpredictability of what they’re about to do. The sort of thing you see in Tarantino films. Some women like that.” But when men see women in sunglasses, “They look more pornographic. Their eyes are gone and the body is emphasized, so you can project your own fantasies.”
If the eyes are the windows to the soul, sunglasses are the curtains on the windows. “They carry a body language that’s comparable to a lady’s fan in Victorian times,” Wilson says. “You can use them to create degrees of intimacy, you can do coquettish things.” For example, dropping your glasses down to the tip of your nose to reveal your eyes works as a flirtatious, seductive gesture. Taking off your shades shows a desire to connect. Putting them on again, you shut yourself off. Casually twirling your sunglasses implies a footloose spirit.
As long as the sun shines, people will spend money on sunglasses. You can pick up a pair of dime-store cheapos, drop a couple hundred bucks on a pair of Revo wraparounds or plunk down $1,250 for a pair of Cartier 24-karat gold shades. According to Jobson Optical Group, an industry research firm, the worldwide sunglasses market in 1996 was worth $2.7 billion.
With all those sunglasses circulating, they’re bound to get misused now and then. Picture, for example, the smug, self-deluded dude who insists on wearing his Ray-Bans indoors in a dimly lit bar as he scans the crowd for a viable femme to astound with his ultra-coolness. “There are times when it’s inappropriate, even rude, to leave your sunglasses on,” Wilson says. “If a man wants to chat up a woman and he’s a real man, he would take the sunglasses off — as if to say, ‘Here I am, in the raw.’”
“Sunglasses have become an essential modern fashion accessory,” Wilson adds. “People wear them because they feel they look good in them. You feel in control.”
Wilson’s study was funded by Dollond & Aitchison, a British optical company.
Scrambled porn
Why should I pay for the channel when the teaser is free and I enjoy it more?
Every night, at the stroke of 10, something magical happens to one of the channels on my cable service. The all-day stream of ho-hum cooking-and-gardening schlock vanishes with a flicker, and the screen explodes into a kaleidoscopic swirl of scrambled sex flicks. These rowdy hump-a-thons feature your standard hardcore fare: the most insatiable nymphos on earth receiving all manner of orificial service from well-hung hunks with jackhammer hips.
Hardcore porn makes for pretty compelling TV when viewed in its unscrambled form, but once the action is fed through a scrambler into my 27-inch Sony, something much different emerges — something finer and more rewarding. Those highly choreographed shag sessions materialize on the screen as the distorted, sliced-up sequences of porno-cubism that jargon-makers call “Picasso porn.”
Continue Reading CloseTrust funds
Will my daughter spend her nest egg on Harvard or new breasts?
It started the day we brought our daughter home from the maternity ward. Or maybe it started earlier, the morning I saw that fateful blue mark on my wife’s pregnancy test strip. No, it began before that. I started worrying about the cost of college tuition the night my wife and I first waded contraceptive-free into the sea of love, letting our reproductive juices mingle for a higher purpose.
Since then the question has dogged me — relentlessly — from every quarter. It’s couched in TV ads, splashed on the sides of city buses and printed on brochures that arrive mysteriously in our mail.
Continue Reading CloseA spoonful of Dickens
British doctors prescribe "bibliotherapy" for the stressed-out and depressed.
Most doctors don’t prescribe fiction for patients who are ill, but that’s exactly what will happen in Britain beginning in September, when doctors and librarians team up to launch a new program that will deliver a therapeutic course of novels to patients suffering from a range of ailments.
As an alternative to traditional medication, family doctors in Kirklees, West Yorkshire, will refer patients who are struggling through bouts of depression, stress and anxiety to a “bibliotherapist” at a local library. The bibliotherapist will then scan the library’s database to create a customized course of books designed to assuage each patient’s particular malady. The goal is to pair patients with books that will serve as an inspiration for them to get better — or at least cheer them up. The pilot program is funded by the government, local health authorities and a libraries’ charity.
Continue Reading CloseKissing therapy
Smooching with a loved one may be good for your health.
“Sweet Helen, make me immortal with a kiss!”
– Doctor Faustus
Consider the case of Melissa, a 32-year-old news writer in Washington, who, after 10 mind-numbing years on the job, had a serious bout of malaise, felt that life had passed her by, decided to quit the damn job and cash out her savings, and went solo vagabonding in the wilds of South America.
One balmy night on the deck of a boat cruising off the coast of Ecuador, she found herself enveloped in the arms of the boat’s swashbuckling captain. They kissed — deeply, passionately. She experienced a sense of absolute liberation, a thrill of letting go. She felt flooded with life-giving energy. Her world, to put it simply, was rocked.
Continue Reading CloseBlue Gene
An IBM supercomputer will try to solve one of the most perplexing mysteries in science: Protein folding.
Big Blue is gearing up to tackle one of science’s most puzzling mysteries. And if the company’s new supercomputer can handle the challenge, its success will mark a giant leap forward in the march against disease.
On Monday, IBM unveiled a $100 million initiative to build a computer that will be 1,000 times more powerful than Deep Blue, the machine that humbled chess champion Garry Kasparov in 1997, and 2 million times more powerful than your average desktop PC. Researchers say the computer, nicknamed Blue Gene, could be operational within five years.
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