Hank Hyena
Research says erect gay penises are bigger
Uncovered Kinsey Report data show homosexual members have hetero ones by a head.
Nov. 4, 1999
Six inches is the average length of a male erection, right? More or less? More (6.32 inches) if you’re gay, apparently. And less (5.99) if you’re straight. Stiff homosexual organs are one-third of an inch longer, claims an article titled “The Relation Between Sexual Orientation and Penile Size” in the June Archives of Sexual Behavior.
The phallus findings are based on archived data from 5,122 measurements of men’s schlongs obtained by the Kinsey Report from 1938-1963.
But isn’t it penile chubbiness that matters more in sexual pleasure? Heteros lose this contest, too. The straight circumference is 4.80 inches, while gays wield a stout 4.95. Dr. Anthony Bogaert of Brock University in Ontario, Canada and Dr. Scott Hershberger of California State University-Long Beach co-authored the recent study, which is part of a larger study on the origins of sexual orientation and behavior.
Reached by phone at his Ontario office, Bogaert generously answered my most probing questions about the penile research.
Why on Earth would gay guys be heavier hung?
“It might have something to do with prenatal hormones that affect the structure and size of genitalia and certain structures of the brain that ultimately affect sexual orientation,” Bogaert said. “If so, this would lend support to theories that believe there are biological factors affecting sexual orientation.”
Did Kinsey researchers actually measure the arched staffs of their subjects?
“No,” the Canadian admitted. “The subjects reported themselves, either by mailing their measurements in, or by reporting their size to an interviewer.”
Men lie about their dimensions, Bogaert acknowledged, but in his opinion, this doesn’t explain the data. “The size discrepancy might have to do with ‘reporting bias’ if gay men are more likely to exaggerate the size of their penis. But we don’t think that’s the explanation. There’s evidence that heterosexuals are as likely to exaggerate as homosexuals.”
As for plans to reenact the original study with excited, contemporary wieners, Bogaert was doubtful.
“I probably won’t do additional research in this area,” he said. “I have other projects, and besides, it’s too expensive.”
Oddly enough, this astounding and controversial discovery has been kept zippered up by the majority of media. Queer columnist Dan Savage commented on it in one of his September columns and the Evening Standard, the London newspaper, noted it on Aug. 24, but generally, it looks like gay vs. straight cock size is a topic that the prudish press finds way too big to handle.
That’s why the story reared its head here, where the whole world is naked.
Carnal goo
New products now being tested promise to alleviate female sexual dysfunction.
Imagine a gel that women layer on their pudenda that magically swells the area with lustful desire. Blood engorges the labia, the clitoris stiffens excitedly and lubrication (the historic task of foreplay) is swiftly unleashed by the moistening cream. A tiny dollop rubbed in softly and — shazam! — the female tingles, itching with passion.
Such a thing exists. Many over-the-counter sex creams that speed up women’s “libida” are already available, and two biopharmaceutical companies are aching to get their new love lotions approved by the Food and Drug Administration. Their medical and financial ambition is to garner the products massive Viagra-esque popularity with women.
Continue Reading CloseSexy penises
The circumcision decision could affect a baby's future sex life.
“He’ll never get a blow job!” pregnant Abigail fretted, “if we don’t circumcise him.”
“Fellatio,” her husband Kent conceded, “is man’s best friend. But why won’t my son get sucked if he’s whole?”
The Berkeley, Calif., baby shower had disintegrated into yet another debate about circumcision. Every well-wisher on the festive patio knew that neo-natal Zachary already owned 15 stuffed animals, nine Dr. Seuss books and enough green overalls to costume an elf army, but the parents — like so many others — hadn’t determined yet if the tot would be sporting a foreskin.
Continue Reading CloseThe quest for sweet semen
I learned how to transform funky spunk into delicious joy juice -- but ultimately decided not to.
“You’ve got funky-tasting spunk,” Samantha tells her bitter paramour on the Aug. 6 “Sex and the City” episode, as she refuses to fellate his foully spurting member. “Giving head [to you] is like a trip to the rotten-egg buffet.”
I winced watching this, because I am consumed with greedy but guilty desire when it comes to the issue of squirting inside the mouth and swallowing. I adore oral acceptance of my penile offering, but I’m cravenly apologetic asking for it, because I’m sure the texture and flavor are repulsive on my lover’s palate. Fear of Samanthas also inhibits me: My crotch loves a tongue-lashing but my ego doesn’t.
Continue Reading ClosePenis gourds: The rebel uniform
Indonesia's government sees the garb worn by Dani tribesmen as backward and an act of defiance.
Indonesia is a polyglot nation of 13,000 islands, 300 ethnic groups and 365 languages that has always been ruled by the heavy-handed, populous Javanese. East Timor’s recent wrenching escape from the iron grip of
Jakarta is only the most visible boil in this archipelago that festers with religious, economic and cultural strife. The next bloodbath could break out in the province of Irian Jaya, the western half of New Guinea, where recent settlers have zero in common with the Stone Age indigenous inhabitants.
Is there a connection between AIDS and circumcision?
Researchers claim decade-old evidence has been ignored.
Male circumcision could help diminish the HIV/AIDS pandemic in developing countries, but health professionals are reluctant to publicize this fact, according to an editorial in the Lancet by Daniel Halperin and Robert Bailey. The authors cite a study, published a decade ago, of 422 Kenyan men who habitually visited prostitutes. The research showed that the uncircumcised men had an 8.2 times greater risk of infection. Of 38 additional investigations, 27 from eight different countries found a similar association between uncut men and infection.
Continue Reading ClosePage 1 of 15 in Hank Hyena