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Tuesday, Jan 23, 2001 8:13 PM UTC2001-01-23T20:13:00Zl, M j, Y g:i A T

The myth of monogamy

According to studies of the animal world, most of us are naturally inclined to "cheat" or at least have more than one mate in a lifetime.

The myth of monogamy

For most biologists, the fact that the Rev. Jesse Jackson had an illegitimate child by one of his staffers is neither surprising nor a revelation. We’ve known for a long time that males from many species tend to be interested in sexual variety, particularly in having more than one partner.

Consider, for instance, this story: A missionary visited a Maori village in 19th century New Zealand and there was a feast in his honor. After the feast, the Maori chief called out, “A woman for the bishop.” Noting the scowl on the prelate’s face, the obliging chief roared again, even louder: “Two women for the bishop!”

Given the choice, most men would rather have two women than one (although not necessarily at the same time). And they’d rather have three than two. As Margaret Mead once pointed out, monogamy is the most difficult of all marital arrangements. For some time, biologists have had a good idea why. Men are sperm makers. Sperm are cheap and easily replaced. Unlike eggs, they do not require that the guy doing the fertilizing become pregnant, give birth and then nurse his young.

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David P. Barash is professor of psychology at the University of Washington in Seattle. His most recent book, "The Myth of Monogamy," coauthored with his wife, Judith Eve Lipton, M.D., is to be published this spring.  More David Barash

Sunday, Feb 12, 2012 1:00 AM UTC2012-02-12T01:00:00Zl, M j, Y g:i A T

Porn’s taboo transsexual stars

"T-girls" are fighting for respect in the adult biz. What does it mean for the general acceptance of trans women?

Transsexuals in porn

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Brittany St. Jordan, a 28-year-old leggy redhead in a plunging gold number, was all dressed up with somewhere to go: the Adult Video News Awards, the so-called “Oscars for the porn industry.” But she ended up standing in line for three hours waiting to walk the red carpet, as other female performers were sent ahead. When she finally got her turn, event organizers directed her away from interviews with the press.

St. Jordan had an idea of why: Unlike the ladies who were sent right in, she’s a transsexual woman.

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Tracy Clark-Flory

Tracy Clark-Flory is a staff writer at Salon. Follow @tracyclarkflory on Twitter.  More Tracy Clark-Flory

Tuesday, Jan 31, 2012 8:35 PM UTC2012-01-31T20:35:00Zl, M j, Y g:i A T

“House” gets asexuality wrong

In a TV first, the Fox drama introduces asexual characters -- only to blame their identity on a medical condition

house4

 (Credit: Fox)

Last week’s episode of “House” marked the first time a major TV network featured self-identified asexual characters. But the asexuality community isn’t exactly celebrating this breakthrough; in fact, many are petitioning Fox executives in outrage.

That’s because the episode ends — spoiler alert! — with the revelation that the characters aren’t asexual after all.

When the show’s cantankerous lead, Dr. Gregory House, learns that his colleague has a female patient who identifies as asexual, and is married to an “asexual” man, he bets him $100 that he can find “a medical reason why she doesn’t want to have sex.” Through his signature unethical approach, House manages to run some tests on the husband under the guise of administering a flu shot. He finds that the man has a pituitary tumor that’s killing his sex drive. Then comes the ultimate reveal: The wife — or “giant pool of algae,” as House calls her — is just pretending to be asexual to make her husband happy.

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Tracy Clark-Flory

Tracy Clark-Flory is a staff writer at Salon. Follow @tracyclarkflory on Twitter.  More Tracy Clark-Flory

Friday, Jan 27, 2012 1:00 AM UTC2012-01-27T01:00:00Zl, M j, Y g:i A T

I’m fixated on my wife’s past

After 25 years of marriage, a man finds himself suddenly obsessing about his partner's sexual history

jealous

 (Credit: brushingup via Shutterstock)

Help! I’ve been married for nearly 25 years, and I can’t stop obsessing over my wife’s past sexual history.

When we first started seeing each other, she was married, I was married and we were both having affairs with other people. She told me in very exquisite detail about many — if not all — of her sexual adventures (many of them extramarital with married men). She went into great detail about how affairs started, when, where, the type of sex performed (oral/anal) with each man. Her sexual experience was far greater than mine.

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Tracy Clark-Flory

Tracy Clark-Flory is a staff writer at Salon. Follow @tracyclarkflory on Twitter.  More Tracy Clark-Flory

Sunday, Jan 22, 2012 7:00 PM UTC2012-01-22T19:00:00Zl, M j, Y g:i A T

The invention of the heterosexual

The history of straightness is much shorter than you'd think. An expert explains its origins

A detail from the cover of "Straight"

A detail from the cover of "Straight"

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If you met Hanne Blank and her partner on the street, you might have a lot of trouble classifying them. While Blank looks like a feminine woman, her partner is extremely androgynous, with little to no facial hair and a fine smooth complexion. Hanne’s partner is neither fully male, nor fully female; he was born with an unconventional set of chromosomes, XXY, that provide him with both male genitalia and feminine characteristics. As a result, Blank’s partner has been mistaken for a gay woman, a straight man, a transman — and their relationship has been classified as gay, straight and everything in between.

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Thomas Rogers is Salon's deputy arts editor.   More Thomas Rogers

Saturday, Jan 21, 2012 8:00 PM UTC2012-01-21T20:00:00Zl, M j, Y g:i A T

Our successful open marriage

My husband and I may seem strange for wanting multiple partners. To my kids, this is what normal looks like

Our open marriage works

 (Credit: Dmitri Mikitenko via Shutterstock)

I spent a recent weekend up in Maine with my girlfriend and our three kids. We went on long canoe trips, made mountains of buttery waffles, and read Rainbow Fairy books aloud till the words blurred together on the page. When the kids had gone to bed and the house was quiet, we crawled into bed and had sex so hot I thought the sheets might catch fire.

When I got home, I told my husband all about it.

My marriage is open. It’s also happy and stable. After I shared our mountain adventures, he filled me in on the highlights of his weekend: a small triumph at work, some quality time with his girlfriend, a successful home repair. We curled up at the end of the night, watched some old “Dr. Who” episodes and went to sleep in each other’s arms.

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Sierra Black lives in the Boston area with her family. She is a frequent contributor to Babble, and blogs about her family life at Childwild. She and her husband will celebrate their 10th anniversary together this year.   More Sierra Black

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