2014's fast food atrocities
Burger King's black cheeseburger: Made with squid ink and bamboo charcoal, arguably a symbol of meat's destructive effect on the planet. Only available in Japan.
The Simpsons (8 p.m., Fox) reruns the one in which Bart uncovers the truth about boy bands; ‘N Sync shows up for humiliation, self-inflicted and otherwise. On a rerun of Dawson’s Creek (8 p.m., WB), Joey has too many responsibilities and too little time to study, and Jack and Jen attend a seminar for gay teens. Get ready for next Sunday’s season opener with last season’s finale of Sex and the City (9 p.m., HBO), in which Carrie is bedeviled by a cock — the kind that crows outside her window at 5 a.m. The school band spends spring break on a concert trip to China on American High (10:30 p.m., PBS, check local listings).
While “The Simpsons” rip their genre on another network, Howie, Nick, Kevin, Brian and A.J. perform in concert in Backstreet Boys: Larger Than Life (8 p.m., CBS). Unsolved cases, including the alleged UFO crash at Roswell, N.M., are (yawn) reopened in Million Dollar Mysteries (9 p.m., Fox).
Yankees at Red Sox (7 p.m., ESPN)
Diamondbacks at Giants (10 p.m., ESPN2)
Bucks at 76ers, Game 5 (9 p.m., NBC)
Rosie O’Donnell (syndicated) Best moments of the year
David Letterman (CBS) Tom Cavanagh, Stupid Pet Tricks (rerun)
Jay Leno (NBC) Billy Joel and Elton John (rerun)
Politically Incorrect (ABC) Colleen Haskell, Jimmy Kimmel
Craig Kilborn (CBS) Phil Jackson (rerun)
All times Eastern unless noted.
Joyce Millman is a writer living in the Bay Area.More Joyce Millman.
Domino's Specialty Chicken: It's like regular pizza, except instead of a crust, there's fried chicken. The company's marketing officer calls it "one of the most creative, innovative menu items we have ever had” -- brain power put to good use.
KFC'S ZINGER DOUBLE DOWN KING: A sandwich made by adding a burger patty to the infamous chicken-instead-of-buns creation can only be described using all caps. NO BUN ALL MEAT. Only available in South Korea.
Taco Bell's Waffle Taco: It took two years for Taco Bell to develop this waffle folded in the shape of a taco, the stand-out star of its new breakfast menu.
Krispy Kreme Triple Cheeseburger: Only attendees at the San Diego County Fair were given the opportunity to taste the official version of this donut-hamburger-heart attack combo. The rest of America has reasonable odds of not dropping dead tomorrow.
Taco Bell's Quesarito: A burrito wrapped in a quesadilla inside an enigma. Quarantined to one store in Oklahoma City.