Books
“The Partly Cloudy Patriot” by Sarah Vowell
A "This American Life" commentator celebrates nerds and explains how to love your country without turning into a boorish, jingoistic, kitsch-crazed lout.
Wouldn’t it be nice if you could be a patriot without having to fly the flag from your porch and the antenna of your car every day, if you could skip applauding crappy, gung-ho songs about how great America is, cheering saccharine, saber-rattling speeches about how great America is, and otherwise wallowing in all the lamebrained, jingoistic posturing that now seems required behavior for U.S citizens who wish to demonstrate a commitment to their country? Yes, it would be very nice.
Good news: At least one of us has managed to pull it off. In her third book, “The Partly Cloudy Patriot,” Sarah Vowell does a bang-up job of being a good American without being a terrible bore. A solid thinker with a warm heart and a smart mouth, she loves the U.S. in much the same way that one loves one’s family (or perhaps a favorite flea-bitten old dog) — acutely aware of its many shortcomings, but true-blue to the end. “My ideal picture of citizenship,” Vowell writes, “will always be an argument, not a sing-along.”
Vowell is a patriot for the rest of us; she believes that devotion to one’s country and an unquestioning support of its government are very different notions. She’s not a breath of fresh air; she’s a deep, satisfying toke of pure intellectual oxygen. This collection of essays, two of which were first published in Salon, arrives just in time to remind us that America is at its best when it’s not blustering, preening and patting itself on the back. When a citizen with a sharp tongue and a wicked sense of humor exercises her mind without kowtowing to that “my country right or wrong” baloney, the U.S. can really shine, as well as laugh.
“Immediately after the attack” of Sept. 11, Vowell recalls in the book’s title piece, “seeing the flag all over the place was moving, endearing. So when the newspaper I subscribe to published a full-page, full color flag to clip out and hang in the window, how come I couldn’t? It took me a while to figure out why I guiltily slid the flag into the recycling bin instead of taping it up. The meaning had changed; or let’s say it changed back. In the first day or two the flags were plastered everywhere, seeing them was heartening because they indicated that we’re all in this sorrow together. The flags were purely emotional. Once we went to war, once the president announced that we were going to retaliate against the ‘evildoers,’ then the flag started making me nervous. The true American patriot is by definition skeptical of the government. Skepticism of the government was actually one of the platforms the current figurehead of the government ran on. How many times in the campaign did President Bush proclaim of his opponent, the then vice president, ‘He trusts the federal government and I trust the people.’? This deep suspicion of Washington is one of the most American emotions an American can have. So by the beginning of October, the ubiquity of the flag came to feel like peer pressure to always stand behind policies one might not necessarily agree with. And, like any normal citizen, I prefer to make up my mind about the issues of the day on a case-by-case basis at 3 a.m. when I wake up from my ‘Nightline’-inspired nightmares.”
In the 19 essays collected in “The Partly Cloudy Patriot,” Vowell writes about her love of Abraham Lincoln’s writing (she calls him “the American Jesus”); “growing up pretentious” in Bozeman, Mont., as a teen cinéaste who doted on the films of Wim Wenders, Werner Fassbinder and Schlöndorff; Teddy Roosevelt; her family; the Salem witch trials and a tour of Salem; the weird lunchroom 750 feet underground at Carlsbad Caverns, and numerous other disparate topics, all of which have to do with the odd character and affectations of this peculiar country and how they resonate in Vowell’s life.
Her grim funniness makes reading her prose addictive, especially if you’ve never quite been able to cram yourself into the American dream. Recalling her own second-grade self in a piece about selling antique maps in San Francisco, she writes, “I think the reason I wasn’t cut out to be a good map seller or a good Californian had something to do with the fact that I dressed up as Wednesday Addams for Halloween that year. ‘The Addams Family’ and ‘The Munsters’ shows, where roses were grown for their thorns and pretty blondes were pitied as monsters, were on TV every afternoon after school when I was a little kid. Throw in three Pentacostal church services a week where they preached that the Antichrist would be a sunny, smooth, all-American charmer, and you have the makings of an insular worldview. Namely, a sneaking suspicion that there’s always a dark side of nice.”
Americans relish contradiction, she says, and she trots out her own quirky interests as an example. We’ve also got an inherent tabloid sensibility, and even on a trip to Paris Vowell’s Yankee attraction for sensational trivia bubbles to the surface in a way that makes you want to take her along on your next trip, or at least buy her a beer. “The French Revolution walking tour I took was mostly a drag,” she writes, “except for a gripping if questionable anecdote about Danton, whose lip was split when he was suckling milk from the teat of a cow and the bull came up and knocked him down and while he was lying there a bunch of pigs trampled his face. Nevertheless, according to the guide, an Englishwoman in a hat, the ladies adored Danton because he was ‘so vital.’”
Vowell’s book is liberally sprayed with armor-piercing quips, such as this fatal shot from an essay in which she takes exception to people, like Ted Nugent, likening themselves to civil rights icon Rosa Parks. “In his autobiography, ‘God, Guns and Rock ‘n’ Roll,’ [Nugent] refers to himself as ‘Rosa Parks with a loud guitar,’” Vowell writes. “That’s so inaccurate. Everyone knows he’s more like Mary Matalin with a fancy deer rifle.” Whoa, Ted, we better get you to a doctor — that’s no flesh wound!
But there’s more to Vowell than precisely targeted sarcasm. She has a feel for this country and its history that’s as authentic as it is unsentimental. She understands that we’re a bunch of damn goofs and that our system, while it’s a mess, may also be the best there is right now. Vowell also grasps that some of our number have achieved greatness, yet the most visionary of leaders — Lincoln, for example — would never have strutted about declaring themselves visionaries, which became something of a habit for our captains of industry in recent years. That Lincoln wrote his own material and wrote it beautifully moves her to call him “one of my favorite writers.” “My grandest hope for my own hastily written sentences,” Vowell says, “is that they would keep a stranger company on an airplane. Abraham Lincoln could turn a pretty phrase such as ‘I invoke the considerate judgment of mankind’ and put it in the proclamation that freed the slaves. Even Mailer wouldn’t claim to top that.”
Of course Norman Mailer is the perfect reference, as he embodies America with all its flaws, biliousness, poetry and brilliance; our best qualities are often inextricably linked to our worst. Vowell gets this, embraces it even — loves the contradiction. We do best when we keep our self-deprecation quotient high, but when we get puffed up and earnest we’re tedious twits. However, Vowell’s even got good things to say for tedious twits, namely, Al Gore.
In one of the book’s strongest pieces, “The Nerd Voice,” in which she identifies herself as “a civics nerd first and last,” Vowell tells of attending George W. Bush’s inauguration, where the only person on the dais she’s happy to look at is Bob Dole, for whom she’s got a soft spot because “he symbolizes a simpler more innocent time in America when you could lose the presidential election and, like, not actually become president.”
Later in the essay she extols Gore’s nerdiness and goes on to effectively diagram why it worked against him so well in the presidential race — a contest she sees as jock vs. nerd. Vowell quotes a friend who explains, “[Gore] was widely perceived as arrogant. If you know something, you’re not smart. You’re a smarty-pants. It’s annoying. People get annoyed with your knowledge. It goes back to high school, to not doing your homework … ‘There’s something I should know, I don’t know why I should know it but someone knows it and I don’t. So I’m going to have to make fun of him now.’”
Yet Vowell makes a distinction between what she terms jocks, athletes and sports fans. “Great athletes are no different from great artists,” she says, and she respects a “certain kind of statistically minded sports fan that’s an actual subspecies of nerd.” Jocks, on the other hand, are what “writer and hockey fan Dave Bidini once described as ‘dull-witted, chick-baiting dickheads.’” (Specific enough for ya?) She then invokes the behavior of Willow on TV’s “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” as an object lesson in how Gore might reconstruct himself as likable without deserting his genuine wonky self. “Willow is not a self-hating nerd,” Vowell writes. “She is a self-deprecating nerd. While Gore, like Giles [another "Buffy" character], is the butt of other people’s jokes, Willow, a postmodern nerd, peppers her cerebral monologues with one-liners that make light of her own book learning.”
Vowell calls that combo the nerd voice and insists it’s a winner. “It’s the self-deprecating impulse Gore lacks,” she writes. (Note to Al Gore: Next time you run, hire Vowell as your image consultant, not Naomi Wolff.)
Vowell ends the essay with a long, eloquent paragraph that ought to be carved in stone somewhere on a public thoroughfare in the nation’s capital, or perhaps posted outside every polling place come Election Day. It comprises a litany of the things a presidential candidate should know, ranging from the names of “all the stars” and “kings and queens of Spain …” and the ability to “explain photosynthesis to a six-year-old” to “the words to Hoagy Carmichael’s ‘Two Sleepy People’ and ‘You Got the Silver’ by the Rolling Stones.”
It’s a great piece of writing, a sharp example of American goofing, funny and true and fraught with deep contradiction, just like the country. From Mark Twain to Richard Pryor, Americans have often stumbled on the truest truths while snorting with laughter. “The Partly Cloudy Patriot” continues a fine tradition.
Douglas Cruickshank is a senior writer for Salon. For more articles by Cruickshank, visit his archive. More Douglas Cruickshank.
“People Who Eat Darkness”: The disappearing blonde
A true crime story set in Tokyo illuminates the complicated truths behind media cliches
Joji Obara and Lucie Blackman (Credit: Estate of Lucie Jane Blackman) Lucie Blackman, 21, went out for the afternoon in 2000, phoning her roommate and best friend Louise to arrange a meeting later that night. Lucie never showed up, and within a few days she’d become one of those vanished blondes whose fates fuel headlines and hours of speculative media coverage. She was British, a former flight attendant, and she and Louise were living in Tokyo. They were also bar hostesses, a profession with a very specific meaning in Japan, difficult to explain to foreigners and not entirely clear to the Japanese themselves. Lucie both did and didn’t match the classic Missing Blonde profile, and for a while the mystery of what happened to her threatened to lapse into permanent obscurity.
Continue Reading Close
Laura Miller is a senior writer for Salon. She is the author of "The Magician's Book: A Skeptic's Adventures in Narnia" and has a Web site, magiciansbook.com. More Laura Miller.
Corporate criminals gone wild
The maker of the documentary film "Inside Job" has a new book excoriating Wall Street -- and President Obama
A detail from the cover of "Predator Nation" “Inside Job,” Charles Ferguson’s Oscar-winning documentary film on how government, Wall Street and academia colluded to deliver us the worst financial crisis since the Great Depression, made a powerful case that something was very very rotten at the heart of the American political/economic nexus. His follow-up book, “Predator Nation: Corporate Criminals, Political Corruption, and the Hijacking of America,” can be considered the legal brief that dots every “i” and crosses every “t” in his argument. A tightly argued, profusely footnoted and deeply enraged castigation of everyone involved, “Predator Nation” isn’t just a factually unchallengeable account of how Wall Street blew up the global economy. It’s a denunciation, a call for justice and a warning: After getting away with the crime of the century, Wall Street still isn’t satisfied.
Continue Reading Close
Andrew Leonard is a staff writer at Salon. On Twitter, @koxinga21. More Andrew Leonard.
Can you identify?
Science shows that the only way around some readers' prejudices is to trick them
(Credit: Shutterstock/Salon) The news of recent research documenting how readers identify with the main characters in stories has mostly been taken as confirmation of the value of literary role models. Lisa Libby, an assistant professor at Ohio State University and co-author of a study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, explained that subjects who read a short story in which the protagonist overcomes obstacles in order to vote were more likely to vote themselves several days later.
The suggestibility of readers isn’t news. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe’s novel of a sensitive young man destroyed by unrequited love, “The Sorrows of Young Werther,” inspired a rash of suicides by would-be Werthers in the late 1700s. Jack Kerouac has launched a thousand road trips. Still, this is part of science’s job: Running empirical tests on common knowledge — if for no other reason than because common knowledge (and common sense) is often wrong.
Continue Reading Close
Laura Miller is a senior writer for Salon. She is the author of "The Magician's Book: A Skeptic's Adventures in Narnia" and has a Web site, magiciansbook.com. More Laura Miller.
“The Aleppo Codex”: The bizarre history of a precious book
A reporter traces the shadowy fate of the definitive version of the Hebrew Bible
Matti Friedman An ancient and priceless book, a murky history of evasions and coverups, an underground of sinister and possibly violent dealers, a former spy who drops tantalizing hints and a wily 84-year-old millionaire who says stuff like, “The problem with this story is that it could damage your health”: Are these the ingredients for a cheesy, improbable historical thriller? Yet “The Aleppo Codex,” Matti Friedman’s account of his attempts to learn the history of one of the world’s most precious books, sports all of these assets, and it’s nonfiction. If reporting this story damaged Friedman’s health, it probably happened when he realized what he’d stumbled into and his reporter’s heart started beating in doubletime.
Continue Reading Close
Laura Miller is a senior writer for Salon. She is the author of "The Magician's Book: A Skeptic's Adventures in Narnia" and has a Web site, magiciansbook.com. More Laura Miller.
Augusten Burroughs: Conquer trauma by letting it go
Salon exclusive: The best-selling memoirist says past horrors haunt us because we think about them too much. Stop
Augusten Burroughs Many people continue to feel influenced and even controlled by the things that happened to them a long time ago. Sometimes, people harbor dark, traumatic memories from childhood. Or fragments of memories — incomplete scenes, uncomfortable feelings, perhaps even a sense of certainty that something specific and terrible happened to them, but little more than this.
Others experienced something traumatic in adulthood that continues to affect them day to day many years later. Maybe an assault has left a person afraid to leave their home or enter a particular neighborhood.
Continue Reading CloseAugusten Burroughs' many books include "Runnning With Scissors," "Dry," "Sellevision," "Magical Thinking" and "Possible Side Effects." His latest book is "This Is How." More Augusten Burroughs.
Page 1 of 984 in Books