2014's fast food atrocities
Burger King's black cheeseburger: Made with squid ink and bamboo charcoal, arguably a symbol of meat's destructive effect on the planet. Only available in Japan.
Some people just plain dislike former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani. Others, like Ed Koch — who was himself mayor of NYC — hate Giuliani with a fiery passion. Koch is the author of “Giuliani: Nasty Man,” and he writes frequent commentaries and movie reviews that he e-mails out to various friends and acquaintances. Here’s how he begins his latest commentary:
As I watched Rudy Giuliani deliver his keynote speech at the Republican National convention last week, I noticed a verbal tic intruding into the former mayor’s hatcheting performance. It was a kind of maniacal laugh appearing before or simultaneously surfacing as he delivered his slashing attack on Senator Obama.
As I watched, I knew I had seen that laugh before. Suddenly I knew, as my brain finished its card sorting of the stored recollections within my skull and came up with the memory I sought. There was the picture of actor Richard Widmark, now deceased, carrying out his role in the movie “Kiss of Death.” I saw once again the scene in which Widmark, playing Tommy Udo, a killer, pushed a wheelchair in which an old woman was sitting and, laughing maniacally, shoved it off the top of the stairs with its occupant still in it.
Someone — a friend of Rudy’s — should draw his attention to this mannerism so that he can seek to eliminate it before he runs for public office again, maybe mayor, maybe governor.
Though it was originally released in 1947, because of the wonder that is YouTube, you can watch the scene that Koch describes below. The key part starts about two minutes in.
Alex Koppelman is a staff writer for Salon.More Alex Koppelman.
Domino's Specialty Chicken: It's like regular pizza, except instead of a crust, there's fried chicken. The company's marketing officer calls it "one of the most creative, innovative menu items we have ever had” -- brain power put to good use.
KFC'S ZINGER DOUBLE DOWN KING: A sandwich made by adding a burger patty to the infamous chicken-instead-of-buns creation can only be described using all caps. NO BUN ALL MEAT. Only available in South Korea.
Taco Bell's Waffle Taco: It took two years for Taco Bell to develop this waffle folded in the shape of a taco, the stand-out star of its new breakfast menu.
Krispy Kreme Triple Cheeseburger: Only attendees at the San Diego County Fair were given the opportunity to taste the official version of this donut-hamburger-heart attack combo. The rest of America has reasonable odds of not dropping dead tomorrow.
Taco Bell's Quesarito: A burrito wrapped in a quesadilla inside an enigma. Quarantined to one store in Oklahoma City.