2014's fast food atrocities
Burger King's black cheeseburger: Made with squid ink and bamboo charcoal, arguably a symbol of meat's destructive effect on the planet. Only available in Japan.
Like Bitch Ph.D., I’ve been waiting for this story.
Amanda Jones, 109 — whose father was born into slavery — has cast her mail-in vote for Barack Obama, the nation’s first black presidential nominee.
As the Austin American-Statesman reports, the Jones family has lived in right-leaning Bastrop County, Texas, for five generations. Jones’ father herded sheep as a slave until he was 12. As a free man, he raised cows, hogs and turkeys on his own land. Jones’ mother — with whom he went on to have 13 children — was born right after the signing of the Emancipation Proclamation.
But there was freedom, and there was freedom: the Jones’ descendants “had to eat at segregated barbecue dives and walk through the back door while white customers walked through the front.”
Still, Jones’ father “urged her to exercise her right to vote, despite discriminatory practices at the polls and poll taxes meant to keep black and poor people from voting,” the article states, adding that those practices were outlawed for federal elections in 1964, but not for state and local races in Texas until 1966. (Thank goodness we no longer have to worry about that kind of thing.) Jones cast her first presidential vote for Franklin D. Roosevelt. (For which of his terms, she can’t recall.) Her daughters confirm that she paid her poll tax before pulling the lever.
Because Amanda Jones is too weak to get herself to the polls, two of her 10 children helped her fill out and send a mail-in ballot for Obama. “I feel good about voting for him,” she said.
So do we, Ms. Jones. So do we.
Domino's Specialty Chicken: It's like regular pizza, except instead of a crust, there's fried chicken. The company's marketing officer calls it "one of the most creative, innovative menu items we have ever had” -- brain power put to good use.
KFC'S ZINGER DOUBLE DOWN KING: A sandwich made by adding a burger patty to the infamous chicken-instead-of-buns creation can only be described using all caps. NO BUN ALL MEAT. Only available in South Korea.
Taco Bell's Waffle Taco: It took two years for Taco Bell to develop this waffle folded in the shape of a taco, the stand-out star of its new breakfast menu.
Krispy Kreme Triple Cheeseburger: Only attendees at the San Diego County Fair were given the opportunity to taste the official version of this donut-hamburger-heart attack combo. The rest of America has reasonable odds of not dropping dead tomorrow.
Taco Bell's Quesarito: A burrito wrapped in a quesadilla inside an enigma. Quarantined to one store in Oklahoma City.