2014's fast food atrocities
Burger King's black cheeseburger: Made with squid ink and bamboo charcoal, arguably a symbol of meat's destructive effect on the planet. Only available in Japan.
Why does every hipster musician sound like a wandering minstrel armed with a battery-operated Casio these days? On “Ambivalence Avenue,” Bibio’s very eclectic sound drifts all over the map, from Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young to Stereolab, resting most often in an unholy threeway between Fleet Foxes, Beck and Funkadelic.
Half of the album sounds like it was recorded on a big old tape recorder, but the borderline-irritating distortion and the scratchiness are redeemed by unexpectedly soulful bass lines and catchy melodies. The lyrics are as groovy as the beats, but delivered with a lighthearted wink. Like a tongue-in-cheek Eckhart Tolle, Stephen Wilkinson sings on “All the Flowers,” “Don’t fret about what doesn’t suit ya/ Try to forget about the future.”
The best tracks on the album, “Haikuesque (When She Laughs)” and the instrumental “Cry! Baby!” demonstrate Wilkinson’s knack for memorably wistful tunes. But the bizarre little electronic ditties and folksy earnestness stuffed in between will erase your memories, so that by the end of the album you’ll find yourself wondering, “What the hell was that?”
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Heather Havrilesky is a regular contributor to the New York Times Magazine, The Awl and Bookforum, and is the author of the memoir "Disaster Preparedness." You can also follow her on Twitter at @hhavrilesky.More Heather Havrilesky.
Domino's Specialty Chicken: It's like regular pizza, except instead of a crust, there's fried chicken. The company's marketing officer calls it "one of the most creative, innovative menu items we have ever had” -- brain power put to good use.
KFC'S ZINGER DOUBLE DOWN KING: A sandwich made by adding a burger patty to the infamous chicken-instead-of-buns creation can only be described using all caps. NO BUN ALL MEAT. Only available in South Korea.
Taco Bell's Waffle Taco: It took two years for Taco Bell to develop this waffle folded in the shape of a taco, the stand-out star of its new breakfast menu.
Krispy Kreme Triple Cheeseburger: Only attendees at the San Diego County Fair were given the opportunity to taste the official version of this donut-hamburger-heart attack combo. The rest of America has reasonable odds of not dropping dead tomorrow.
Taco Bell's Quesarito: A burrito wrapped in a quesadilla inside an enigma. Quarantined to one store in Oklahoma City.