The IAU’s vote has rendered astronomy textbooks obsolete; seven decades’ worth of science projects are suddenly off the mark. But the consequences of this new classification don’t merely affect labs and classrooms, but stargazing astrologers the world over. Now that Pluto’s just a marginalized ball of ice, will our luck change for the better — or worse? Will the IAU’s decision redirect our love lives? To find out, Salon phoned Cheryl Lee Terry, who writes the “Planet Terry” horoscope column for Time Out New York.

How will Pluto’s demotion affect astrology?

It really doesn’t matter, because there are a lot of heavenly bodies floating around that we count in our equations. Astronomers give names to planets — we just consider them heavenly bodies that we interact with. If the astronomers want to say it’s not a planet, that’s great, but it’s not going to change Pluto’s influence. So we believe in Pluto. It’s really been active. This has been a pretty bad month, and Pluto has been one of the instigators.

So Pluto helped bring about its own demise?

There’s a bad aspect to Aug. 31 that comes around once every 48 years — let me look at my calendar. Oh, that’s Saturn. We’ve had some very bad asteroid hits in the past month. On the 17th, when the peace talks were happening, Pluto had a good meeting with the sun. But the war isn’t over. [Laughs] It doesn’t take an astrologer to figure that out.

It’s a new moon for me today. You’re the third phone call I’ve gotten that’s good for my career. Right now for you, there are a lot of financial concerns.

Actually, that’s true. My apartment was robbed on Tuesday.

Everything’s all about money now. In September, you’ll be feeling better about things. Security’s a big issue right now for all Cancers. If I were to tell you something — because you’re young — you want to let go of relationships small and big. Just relax your grip. How old are you?

I’m 25.

You’re going into your Saturn return. You’re coming into this huge change in your life. I don’t know if you’re leaving your job —

It’s my last day interning at Salon.

You’ve got a really hard year ahead of you, but in a good way. It will be big challenge. It’s really kind of exciting.

Wow, thanks. Getting back to Pluto, does the planet have a personality that you could describe?

He — we call Pluto a he — is manipulation. His personality is Machiavellian. Obsessions, compulsions, influence peddling. And the big one is transformation. When you get into a heavy Pluto stage, you’re transforming your life. Pluto when he’s bad is compulsive and obsessive. When he’s good, he’s there to transform you and push you along. He takes no prisoners. When he comes in contact with your sign, you either transform your life or learn a hard lesson.

Basically, they’re changing the label, and that doesn’t matter to me. Just like if you change your name, you’re still the same person. We love him too much — they can’t take Pluto away from us.

Evan: April 4, 1973, 4 p.m. Aries Water Ox, hour of Monkey.
Lily: Jan. 4, 1973, Capricorn Water Rat, hour unknown.
Ruby: July 2, 1995, 11 a.m., Cancer Wood Pig, hour of Horse (Snake cusp).
Saskia: Feb. 21, 1998, 1 a.m. Pisces (Aq cusp) Earth Tiger, hour of Ox (Rat cusp).

According to Chinese lore, the Ox, which you might think of as an unflashy kind of creature, managed to win second place in the Chinese year ranking, because he had such a good nature; he knew how important it was to be helpful to others. As the story goes, all the animals were summoned to Buddha to say goodbye as he prepared to lift off from Earth. The 12 animals that showed up to pay their respects earned a place on the astrological calendar according to the order in which they turned up. The Rat, who had been cleverest about rounding everyone up, made sure to be first by catching a ride in on the back of the dutiful, compliant Ox. The powerful, beautiful Tiger knew from respect; he was right behind them. Headstrong Horse only placed seventh, despite his speed, because he resented being told where to go. And the naughty Pig came in last, but did at least show up, which was worth something!

The Ox and the Rat have had a complex relationship ever since then; better as lovers though than as co-workers, because every now and then, an Ox in an office begins to wonder if his Rat colleague might be taking advantage of him in some way. But in a romantic relationship, they get along famously. The Ox is enchanted by the Rat’s sparkle, while the socially astute, family-building Rat enormously respects the Ox’s trustworthiness and perseverance. The Ox and Rat combination is a wonderful way to head a household. Evan has a really lucky combination; Ox grounds him, while his Monkey birth hour gives him poise, humor and shrewd business sense, and makes him more adaptable than some Oxen. (His Water year sign gives him another boost in adaptability.) Meanwhile, his Aries birth month gives him creativity, ambition and strong family sense. Aries natives thrive when they feel indispensable to a close network of relatives. I think that, in Evan’s case, Aries moodiness will be lightened by the Monkey wit and the Ox’s innate “let’s just get on with it” mentality.

Lily also has a well-balanced meld; her subtle, social, adept, quick-thinking, acquisitive Rat character is wedded to the pragmatic, thoughtful, Capricorn month; which means she is a woman who makes decisions for long-term, and never makes them lightly. She will not be flighty, she knows how to ride out difficulties, and Water Rat is especially gifted at sensing other people’s emotions, so she’ll be a great smoother-over of any difficulties.

Now, the girls! Evan gave their birth times as on the hour — 11 a.m. and 1 a.m. But he should check their birth certificates, and make sure that isn’t over-general, because those are both cusp times; 10:59 a.m. is the hour of the Snake, 11:01 a.m. is the hour of the Horse; whereas 12:59 a.m. is the hour of the Rat, and 1:01 a.m. is the hour of the Ox.

Assuming Ruby is in fact a Cancer Wood Pig, born in the hour of the Horse, she will be loyal to her family and eager to please. Pig is strongly compatible in the parent-child relation with both Rat and Ox. Ruby’s Cancer month makes her potentially quite sensitive and emotional, and the Cancer-Pig meld can produce greediness for pleasure and possessions, and problems with self-discipline. Still, I believe the fortunate Wood year birth reins in the Pig propensity to excess here, — besides granting her the gift of good judgment and unusual tact — so I think Ruby will be just fine. You might try to gently guide her to establish sensible limits for herself early on, just in case. Pigs are usually very popular and make friends easily, and Wood Pigs are especially generous and lovable. Ruby’s Cancer sun sign means she will be good at very many things, but will have a hard time figuring out what she cares most about, or wants to do with her life, in school and later work. On the whole, she’ll be a sunny child, quietly sociable, well-meaning and hardworking. Any bursts of excitability will probably come from her restless Horse-hour birth.

It’s funny that, as you sense, Saskia really is more of a wild card, at least as far as her moon sign is concerned. Tigers get along a wee bit better with Rats than with Oxen, but the relationship still takes work and communication. The most important thing for you and Lily to keep in mind is that Tiger does not respond well to criticism. They are so noble and charming that if they sense they are failing to please, they can’t believe it — it feels to them like a great injustice. So try to hold your tongues unless something really matters. However, if Saskia was born in the hour of the Ox, you lucked out; she will approve of you and respect you on a basic, unshakable level. Also, being an Ox-hour Tiger, she’ll probably feel free to tell you if she’s mad (Pisces may mute this effect; try to be observant), so any grievances are likely to get aired, rather than fester.

As a Tiger, Saskia might be more flamboyant and attention-seeking than the three of you; if so, try not to think that different is wrong. Still, as an Earth Tiger, the calmest and most realistic of the Tiger years, she should be fairly well-attuned to the rest of the family, and her Pisces sun sign will also help make her get along well with you and Lily — Ox and Rat. Pisces girls are the most inscrutable sign in the calendar; calm, feminine, perfectionist and socially astute, they try to blend in to their surroundings. While projecting feminine gentleness, and seeming to defer to their superiors and elders, they manage to subtly lay down rules for behavior that people in their families and peer groups can’t resist following.

More good news: Saskia and Ruby should get along very well; Pigs and Tigers quarrel a lot, but they have strong bonds and great affinity for each other, and will make each other laugh.

So relax — it looks like there won’t be strife in the Ark, or rather, none sent by the stars!

And yet, she wavers, “We never quite jumped in with both feet, and though we’re compatible in many, many respects, I’m still a little bit of a wild child with self-destructive tendencies, and Jasmine plays grown-up too much and sinks into bouts of passive-aggressiveness.” They both want to date others, but don’t want the affair to end — a proposition known as having your cake and eating it, too. “Should we gently put our relationship in the over-and-done-with stack,” Amanda asks, or “should we get into a counselor’s office now so as not to risk losing a lifelong love to the cauterizing barriers we will build without each other?”

Amanda: Dec. 29, 1969, noon hour. Capricorn Earth Rooster, hour of the Horse.

Jasmine: May 15, 1974, 9:02 a.m. Taurus Air Tiger, hour of the Snake.

If Jasmine, a well-rounded Taurus Tiger, knew how analytically and soberly Amanda, a conscientious Cap Rooster, regards their breakup, she would be mystified. The Rooster and the Tiger are not exactly compatible, not exactly incompatible; they both see the world through different windows. The Tiger looks out, takes in the whole terrain, assumes its hers for the taking, and wonders how she can best enjoy and use it; the Rooster looks out, notices the potholes, the fallen trees, the things that need fixing, and the troubling intruders and worries about how best to bring everything and everyone on the property into line. If the Tiger jumps into the landscape, the Rooster will think the Tiger also needs to be brought into line, but the Tiger will resist curtailments of its freedom. In short, the Rooster has control issues, the Tiger has “being controlled” issues.

As an Earth Rooster, Amanda does not shy away from difficult truths. She wants to get to the bottom of everything, and she never does a job halfway. If she is Rooster-like, she will tell people what she thinks needs fixing; if she is Hen-like, she will be much more tactful and quiet, but will know how to make her approval or disapproval felt. Her Capricorn Western sign reinforces her tendency toward duty, order and the success and public esteem that come from consistent hard work. Luckily, Amanda has been splashed with Horse by her birth hour, which puts some Technicolor in Kansas. Her strong, pragmatic character will be punctuated by bursts of intuition, caprice and emotionality. Nonetheless, the Earth Rooster-Cap blend produces a little more reality than the average pleasure-loving, praise-seeking Air Tiger can really bear; and the vivacious Horse hour, in addition to rounding out Amanda’s character, also gives her the wit to make really astute, painful criticisms. Here, it’s worth adding, Air Tiger’s self-serving nature can wound the Rooster; and if Amanda has lashed out at Jasmine verbally, she has probably had reason. Since Amanda says the couple has not fought much, it may be that Amanda has bottled up her anger, not wishing to estrange her captivating Tiger. Tigers can be sadistic, and Roosters need to make sure that in humoring their Tigers, they’re not mistaking masochism for patience — and letting themselves get plucked.

It is probably Jasmine’s Taurus sun sign that fuels this couple’s attraction. The reliable Taurus is an earth sign (like Capricorn) and helps ground Jasmine’s volatile Air Tiger moon sign. The Tiger year gives great charm, humor, popularity, intellect, strength and ability, but it does not give a firm work ethic, or a very solid notion of honor and commitment. Air Tigers can work hard, as other Tigers do, but they prefer to be more opportunistic — to get results from working not so very hard — and their moral choices tend to be based on expedience and personal benefit. Calling them on this will make them angry; to remain friends with a Tiger, you must continue admiring the Tiger. Tigers will not stay long with a nonfan. Also, Tigers ultimately like to be the boss in their relationship, which is hard for Roosters, who are equally prideful, to swallow. However, the blending of the conservative, traditional, fair-minded, dutiful Taurus with Tiger creates a nicely balanced personality. The Tiger charm will be wedded to the Bull’s greater sense of honor and mission. The Taurus deliberateness and rigidity will be lightened and broadened by the Tiger joie de vivre and creativity. In a couple of years, Jasmine’s Snake hour birth will assert itself more, calming her Tiger agitation and putting her more in tune with Amanda’s outlook. But can they ride out the wait?

Amanda and Jasmine’s Taurus and Capricorn earth signs attract them to each other, but their Moon signs bedevil them with Big Picture conflicts. Taurus Tiger likes to live in the moment and not over-analyze that moment; Capricorn Rooster likes to think long-term and evaluate the moment ad infinitum. Oxen (1973) and Snakes (1965 or 1977) warm to the Rooster approach, Tigers don’t, quite. Tigers tend to prefer the more impetuous signs, such as Dogs (1970) and Horses (1978).

Because both Amanda and Jasmine have very self-sufficient melds, they are each so complete in themselves that it may be hard for them to hook up with others; they are like two marbles, not like two puzzle pieces, they are non-interlocking players. If they choose to draw others into the game, they might try seeking partners who also have well-rounded melds but who have a birth year that is more compatible with theirs (as described above). Still, there’s no reason for Amanda and Jasmine to shoot each other out of the circle while they wait for the other marbles to turn up — as long as they can play nice.

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How to write to Love Collision

What coy stars are toying with this couple, pushing them into perpetual orbit without letting them collide?

Clive: Sept. 10, 1959, 2:37 p.m. Virgo Earth Boar, hour of the Sheep

Ida: Aug. 21, 1963, Leo-Virgo cusp Water Rabbit

Clive’s and Ida’s birth years — Boar and Rabbit — are ideally matched; Boar, Rabbit and Sheep have a built-in strong affinity for each other, and Clive’s Sheep birth hour means that on the Lunar Calendar, Clive and Ida have all the bases covered. However, the criss-crossing of their Lunar and Solar calendars creates motivational conflicts, which will explain why this couple hasn’t got to first base.

Ida is a “shy Leo” according to Clive, but since such a combination is essentially unimaginable, I’m going to go out on a limb and call Ida a Virgo-Leo cusp, leaning to Virgo, since she demonstrates few Leonine tendencies, was born on the verge of Virgo, Aug. 21 (most calendars start Virgo on the 22nd), and has never married. If we knew her birth hour, that could help pin her down further, but she has the makings of a classic Virgo Rabbit, so let’s stop there. A Virgo Rabbit will be highly intelligent, hardworking, observant, friendly, verbal, gentle, loving, idealistic, ultra-sensitive to others’ emotions, graceful, gracious and (often) quite beautiful. She is also self-critical, indecisive, idealistic, sentimental, set in her ways and easily upset.

Virgo Rabbits remember past grievances a long time. They often don’t get along with their parents, but they enjoy being spouses and parents themselves. They can be squeamish and highly spookable, and generally avoid unsubtle people and messy situations. For some Rabbits, “messy” includes sex. Rabbits tend to fall to one extreme or another sexually; they are usually either highly sexed (in which case they settle down early, build families and channel their sensuality into safe outlets, so they can work well and support their families), or they are unusually aphysical.

Reticent Rabbits still seek intimacy, emotional connectedness and love with another person, but they frequently lack much libido and would secretly rather not mess with the embarrassing affair of sex at all. They will give sex to get love and children, though; and if you reassure them of their specialness to you, and make the whole business as affectionate and secure as possible, you can coax them to play. It is tricky to woo a reticent Rabbit, but their love is deep and lasting once won; they are loyal as can be, and sunny when humored. But a Rabbit doesn’t like to be dislodged from its security; to win one, you must convince her that she’ll feel more secure with you than on her own.

Clive is lucky that, as an Earth Boar, he is predisposed to strive valiantly, good-humoredly, and unstintingly toward his goal. Like all Boars, he will care about his creature comforts, so at the age of 42, he probably has achieved a comfortable lifestyle by now — which has removed some of the urgency of finding a mate. Boars are usually quite sensual, and physically expressive, but as a Virgo, Clive may well display reticent Rabbit qualities, making him less randy than some Boars, more thoughtful, more critical of himself and others, fussier and more averse to change. This gentle part of his disposition draws him to Ida, whose quietness and subtlety heighten her allure for him, and reassure his masculinity. Both Boar and Rabbit have strong instincts for privacy (they both can be selfish or exclusive toward those outside their inner circle) and a strong nesting ability; they are good together; but the problem is, both signs are also very good at creating a home whether or not they have a partner. Because Ida seems to be governed by an over-cautious constellation, whether this flirtation remains an end or evolves into a means — that is, a real relationship — will probably depend on Clive.

Clive’s Boar Moon sign gives him the extra burst of physicality needed to push matters forward; to woo his cautious Virgo Rabbit, he will need to make his interest plain, in non-aggressive terms; show Ida that with him, she would live more happily than she lives alone, and convince her both that he admires her romantically, and that mere physicality is not all that matters to him. A full-on pounce is not advised; but a courtshippy outing leading to a kiss would be a good start. After such a date, a present would impress her. But this again depends on Clive; what are his intentions?

His Sheep hour birth makes him especially kindhearted and tolerant of others’ calling the shots, but is Ida really calling the shots here? Or is Clive actually dawdling, because he’s not sure he wants to give up his comfortable Boar bachelor life? In his letter, Clive stressed his and Ida’s unmarriedness; so it sounds as if he’s thinking of Ida as his potential future wife, which is probably why he’s dawdling; it’s a big change, and he’s a happy Earth Boar whose life is already OK. Once he’s made up his mind, he’ll have no problem drawing his lovely coy rabbit out of her hole. It’s his neurotic Virgo impulse (and hers) holding them up.

Both of them need to quit dwelling on their separate pasts, and fretting about their possibly combined future, and succumb to the present. Let the Rabbit-Boar attraction pull them into the moment, and see what it brings.

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How to write to Love Collision