A teacher introduces a student to an anatomically correct doll in a kindergarten classroom in central China. The dollies are simply meant to teach kids about the age-appropriate subjects of anatomy and how babies are made — this is “sex ed” in its most basic form. The blog Shanghaiist describes a scene from this particular classroom: “[The teacher] asked the class how sperm swims to find the egg, with her students replying by clasping their hands together and moving them in a side-to-side tadpole-like swimming motion.” Say it with me now: Awww.

Your Beanie Babies collection has nothing on these plush toys, which come in a new sex ed kit that has been handed out to over 30 grade schools in Basel, Switzerland. None too surprisingly, conservatives have seized on one line in the accompanying teacher’s manual: “Touching can be enjoyed heartily.” But the city’s education minister explains that it’s only within the context of teaching kids about appropriate versus inappropriate touching. Admittedly, though, the program’s creators made acceptance a steeper uphill battle by calling it “The Sex Box” — especially seeing as the country has gated prostitution areas known as “sex boxes.” Yeah.

The anatomically correct dolls made by the Amamanta Family are meant to help parents with “the birds and the bees” talk. The mommy doll above demonstrates pregnancy and childbirth — and each breast is adorned with a button that snaps right into the baby doll’s creepy metal-socket mouth. (I fully expect to have “Child’s Play”-esque nightmares about that toy tonight.)

These educational dolls, known as Tak and Kar Kar, were developed by the Family Planning Association of Hong Kong. Like the dolls mentioned earlier that are used in mainland China, these come with detailed genitalia but have one additional feature: a baby that pops out of the mom’s vagina, dangling by its umbilical cord like a wee bungee jumper.

All praise the Wondrous Vulva Puppet, sold by Vulva University. These potpourri-infused numbers are intended for curious children and adults alike. Each silk and velvet vag is named after a goddess and goes for $125 a pop each.

Teach A Bodies sells families of anatomically correct dolls that are used for everything from “the sex talk” to interviewing kids believed to have been sexually abused. They also offer life-size models that the company claims have been a “tremendous success” in teaching sex ed at schools for the blind.

This is Teach A Bodies’ life-size Birth-a-Baby, which, well, I’ll let the product description speak for itself: “The baby comes inside a cloth uterus with detachable umbilical cord and placenta.” Check out the attention to detail: “The baby can be removed from the uterus through the cervix or the Caesarean opening.”