Donald Trump has big convention surprise planned apparently

America's most famous fake mogul promises to wow the Republican National Convention

Topics: Donald Trump, Republican National Convention,

Donald Trump has big convention surprise planned apparentlyDonald Trump (Credit: AP/Andrew Cowan)
Alex's story provoked the following tweet from Donald Trump: "Lightweight reporter Alex Pareene @pareene is known as a total joke in political circles. Hence, he writes for Loser Salon. @Salon"

Donald Trump, an oft-bankrupt make-believe mogul clown with a television show where he pretends to fire America’s saddest former celebrities, is one of the Republican Party’s most prominent national figures, because he is on TV and people have heard of him. So, after flirting with a pretend presidential run in late 2011, he became a very important Mitt Romney Supporter, helping with fundraising and robocalls and so on. Also Donald Trump believes, and frequently says, on television, that the president was secretly born in Kenya and that his birth certificate is a fraud and that he’s a secret Muslim who got into Harvard Law even though he’s an idiot thanks to affirmative action and that Bill Ayers secretly ghost-wrote the president’s first memoir. And he will have a special surprise at the Republican National Convention later this month!

Last week, Trump said, “I was asked to speak at the RNC but said no,” which is Trump Code for “I begged them to let me speak and someone thought that was probably a bad idea,” but to allow him to save face he claimed that he “will be doing something much bigger–just watch!”

And today, Trump again teased his special Republican National Convention surprise:

You Might Also Like

Everyone! Anyway like one week ago Trump also Tweeted this:

So maybe that’s the surprise? I mean it’s a surprise that the Republican Party is actively embracing Donald Trump, a widely hated fraud who subscribes to an entire host of insane and racist conspiracy theories about the president’s background, but not really a “big surprise.”

The real surprise is almost definitely just going to be some idiotic video where Trump “fires” an Obama impersonator.

Alex Pareene
Alex Pareene writes about politics for Salon and is the author of "The Rude Guide to Mitt." Email him at apareene@salon.com and follow him on Twitter @pareene

More Related Stories

Featured Slide Shows

  • Share on Twitter
  • Share on Facebook
  • 1 of 8
  • Close
  • Fullscreen
  • Thumbnails
    Sonic

    7 ways Americans have defiled the hot dog

    Sonic's Bacon Double Cheddar Croissant Dog

    Sonic calls this a "gourmet twist" on a classic. I am not so, so fancy, but I know that sprinkling bacon and cheddar cheese onto a tube of pork is not gourmet, even if you have made a bun out of something that is theoretically French.

    Krispy Kreme

    7 ways Americans have defiled the hot dog

    Krispy Kreme's Doughnut Dog

    This stupid thing is a hotdog in a glazed doughnut bun, topped with bacon and raspberry jelly. It is only available at Delaware's Frawley Stadium, thank god.

    KFC

    7 ways Americans have defiled the hot dog

    KFC's Double Down Dog

    This creation is notable for its fried chicken bun and ability to hastily kill your dreams.

    Pizza Hut

    7 ways Americans have defiled the hot dog

    Pizza Hut's Hot Dog Bites Pizza

    Pizza Hut basically just glued pigs-in-blankets to the crust of its normal pizza. This actually sounds good, and I blame America for brainwashing me into feeling that.

    Carl's Jr.

    7 ways Americans have defiled the hot dog

    Carl's Jr. Most American Thick Burger

    This is a burger stuffed with potato chips and hot dogs. Choose a meat, America! How hard is it to just choose a meat?!

    Tokyo Dog

    7 ways Americans have defiled the hot dog

    Tokyo Dog's Juuni Ban

    A food truck in Seattle called Tokyo Dog created this thing, which is notable for its distinction as the Guinness Book of World Records' most expensive hot dog at $169. It is a smoked cheese bratwurst, covered in butter Teriyaki grilled onions, Maitake mushrooms, Wagyu beef, foie gras, black truffles, caviar and Japanese mayo in a brioche bun. Just calm down, Tokyo Dog. Calm down.

    Interscope

    7 ways Americans have defiled the hot dog

    Limp Bizkit's "Chocolate Starfish and the Hot Dog Flavored Water"

    This album art should be illegal.

  • Recent Slide Shows

Comments

0 Comments

Comment Preview

Your name will appear as username ( settings | log out )

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href=""> <b> <em> <strong> <i> <blockquote>