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Sunday, Jan 20, 2013 2:59 PM UTC

Salon limerick contest

Salon readers write the news in doggerel

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Topics: Salon Limerick, Lance Armstrong, Oprah, NRA, Gun Control, NFL, Writers and Writing, Poetry, ,

Salon limerick contest

In this week’s contest, the NRA, quantum physics, and Lance Armstrong.

 

The NRA is claiming huge membership increases as well as spike in the sale of assault rifles.

Did we have an assault weapons binge?

Just the thought should make all of us cringe.

Can we trust NRA,

to be honest when they,

Are the voice of a lunatic fringe?

Stephen Whitred
Barriere, B.C., Canada

 

Teachers with guns? – No thank you.

It’s an idea we need to eschew.

For let’s not forget,

There’d be a new threat;

Teachers can go psycho too.

Mark Tendas
Los Angeles
Quarterbacks come and quarterbacks go.

It ain’t rocket science- it’s just a big show.

So why shed a tear,

For the life and career,

Of the prayerful Timothy Tebow?

David Lloyd Maron
New York City

Experiencing quantum reality
Nick’s achieved the impossible feat –
Weaned himself from the classical teat.
Now he knows where it’s at,
With Schrödinger’s Cat,
But needs help in crossing the street.
Nick Herbert
Boulder Creek, Calif.

 

In a tale of pro cycling woe,

Doping brought down a mighty hero.
But one detail I find,
Really frazzles my mind,
Who knew Oprah still had her own show?

Tom Foltz
Fort Wayne, Ind.

Send entries to limericks@salon.com along with your name and hometown. The deadline is Friday at noon eastern and we’ll publish our favorites on Sunday.  Good luck!

Alex Halperin is news editor at Salon. You can follow him on Twitter @alexhalperin. More Alex Halperin.

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  • Lisa Montgomery embraces her nephew Thursday after a tornado tore apart her home in Cleburne, Texas. The twister killed six people and destroyed entire swaths of the North Texas town.
    Credit: AP/LM Otero

  • Jack McMahon, the defense attorney for abortion doctor Kermit Gosnell, speaks outside the Criminal Justice Center Philadelphia Tuesday. His client was convicted of killing three babies in his clinic, and will serve multiple life sentences.
    Credit: AP/Matt Rourke

  • A photo taken Monday captures Vice President Joe Biden's response to a Milwaukee second-grader's innovative proposal to end America's epidemic of gun violence. This guy!
    Credit: AP/Jenny Aicher

  • Sen. Rand Paul, R-Ky., flanked by a grouper-eyed Michele Bachmann, addresses the IRS' admission that it targeted Tea Party groups in advance of the 2012 election. In an op-ed for CNN Thursday, the Kentucky senator slammed the president for his faux outrage.
    Credit: AP/Molly Riley

  • Ousted IRS chief Steven Miller is sworn in on Capitol Hill Friday. Miller testified before the House Ways and Means Committee on the extra scrutiny the agency gave conservative groups applying for tax-exempt status.
    Credit: AP/J. Scott Applewhite

  • Attorney General Eric Holder pauses as he testifies on Capitol Hill before the House Judiciary Committee Wednesday. Holder is under fire, among other things, for the Justice Department's gathering of phone records at the Associated Press.
    Credit: AP/Carolyn Kaster

  • O.J. Simpson sits during an evidentiary hearing at Clark County District Court in Las Vegas, Nev., Thursday. Simpson, who is currently serving a nine-to-33-year sentence in state prison for armed robbery and kidnapping, is using a writ of habeas corpus to seek a new trial.
    Credit: AP/Las Vegas Review-Journal/Jeff Scheid

  • Major Tom to ground control: On Sunday astronaut Chris Hadfield recorded the first music video from space, a cover of David Bowie's "Space Oddity."
    Credit: AP/NASA/Chris Hadfield

  • When it rains it pours. President Barack Obama speaks during a news conference Thursday with Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan, inexplicably inspiring an #umbrellagate Twitter meme.
    Credit: AP/Jacquelyn Martin

  • A smoke plume rises high above a road block at the intersection of County A and Ross Road east of Solon Springs, Wis., Tuesday. No injuries were reported, but the the wildfire caused evacuations across northwestern Wisconsin.
    Credit: AP/The Duluth News-Tribune/Clint Austin

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