The news in nonsense verse
Salon readers dissect Manti Te’O's troubles, the recipes at Burger King and the political scene:
I feel sorry for poor Manti Te’O.
Turns out his sweetie pie wasn’t reo.
It was just his best friend,
Playing those tricks again,
“I’m not gay,” Manti says – oh, pleo.
Key West, Fla.
I grew up with William F. Buckley
Well known for his sesquipedality
Was oft a charade
But it beat out today’s right-wing sophistry.
Barack relies more on Joe,
Whose popularity continues to grow,
He’s doing just fine,
With approval fifty nine,
Joe’s catching up, but does Hillary know?
There once was a “man” named Rand Paul.
Who thought himself Ruler of All.
His mental artillery,
Was pilloried by Hillary.
His sword was revealed to be small.
Deborah Newell Tornello
St. Petersburg, Fla.
As Burger King searches discreet.
For equine in each patty treat,
Consumers can now,
Cry out, “Holy cow!
Fast food might have actual meat!”
Send entries to firstname.lastname@example.org along with your name and hometown. The deadline is Friday at noon eastern and we’ll publish our favorites on Sunday. Poems may be edited for clarity or scansion. Good luck!
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