Cardigans? A must. Pearls? But of course. Rompers? Ayn Rand would not approve
This week, a large group of people will converge at a single location and make small talk about things like undermining a woman’s right to an abortion and why there should be prayer in public schools. No, it’s not the papal conclave; it’s the 2013 Conservative Political Action Conference!
And, like most other professional gatherings, there is a dress code. As a helpful reminder, there is a Pinterest board to advise you on what will — and won’t — fly while you’re taking in panels like “Are You Sick and Tired of Being Called a Racist and You Know You’re Not One?”
Go ahead and channel your inner Tracy Flick: Cardigans, tweed skirts — the whole nine yards. And feel free to add a little flair to your attire. Nothing says “I might think the United Nations is an anti-American conspiracy, but I still know how to have fun“ like a little ruffle around your collar.
Business suits. Business suits. Business suits. You may think this is just a staple of nonpartisan professional attire, but you would be wrong. They are best suited, so to speak, for CPAC.
Golf shirts. Caveat: For guys only. Sorry, ladies, no sports attire for you.
Pearls. Stylish, classic and good for clutching at the prospect of gays getting married.
“Would you wear it to Walmart?” the guide asks. If the answer is yes, ditch it. T-shirts are particularly verboten, even if it’s one that you bought at the conference because you are very into the desecration of detainee corpses.
Rompers. You lose points at CPAC if you even know what a romper is. And if you hydrate as urgently as Marco Rubio, you will find yourself taking the whole blasted thing off every time you need to use the facilities. Just don’t do it.
Uggs. This style tip could actually bring our deeply fractured political system together, as everyone seems to equally hate the marshmallow-shaped Australian footwear.
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Lisa Montgomery embraces her nephew Thursday after a tornado tore apart her home in Cleburne, Texas. The twister killed six people and destroyed entire swaths of the North Texas town.
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Jack McMahon, the defense attorney for abortion doctor Kermit Gosnell, speaks outside the Criminal Justice Center in Philadelphia Tuesday. His client was convicted of killing three babies in his clinic, and will serve multiple life sentences.
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A photo taken Monday captures Vice President Joe Biden's response to a Milwaukee second-grader's innovative proposal to end America's epidemic of gun violence. This guy!
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Sen. Rand Paul, R-Ky., flanked by a grouper-eyed Michele Bachmann, addresses the IRS' admission that it targeted Tea Party groups in advance of the 2012 election. In an op-ed for CNN Thursday, the Kentucky senator slammed the president for his faux outrage.
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Ousted IRS chief Steven Miller is sworn in on Capitol Hill Friday. Miller testified before the House Ways and Means Committee on the extra scrutiny the agency gave conservative groups applying for tax-exempt status.
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Attorney General Eric Holder pauses as he testifies on Capitol Hill before the House Judiciary Committee Wednesday. Holder is under fire, among other things, for the Justice Department's gathering of phone records at the Associated Press.
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O.J. Simpson sits during an evidentiary hearing at Clark County District Court in Las Vegas, Nev., Thursday. Simpson, who is currently serving a nine-to-33-year sentence in state prison for armed robbery and kidnapping, is using a writ of habeas corpus to seek a new trial.
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Major Tom to ground control: On Sunday astronaut Chris Hadfield recorded the first music video from space, a cover of David Bowie's "Space Oddity."
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When it rains it pours. President Barack Obama speaks during a news conference Thursday with Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan, inexplicably inspiring an #umbrellagate Twitter meme.
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A smoke plume rises high above a road block at the intersection of County A and Ross Road east of Solon Springs, Wis., Tuesday. No injuries were reported, but the the wildfire caused evacuations across northwestern Wisconsin.
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