Space porn: These images are (quite literally) out of this world
The best limericks submitted by Salon readers since the election:
So we’ve come to this point, as a nation,
Where a white man with money and station,
Is no longer a shoe-in,
So the Right Wing’s now stewin’:
“’Tis the End of Civilization!”
Bruce F. Cole
From Delaware hails our VP,
A fiscal cliff jumper is he.
He’ll work on your pecs,
Offer old ladies sex,
Won’t someone please put this guy on TV?
Where’s Obama’s diversity minder–
His “qualified female” staff finder?
He’s named white guys galore,
To positions top-drawer,
Perhaps he should borrow Mitt’s binder.
Did we have an assault weapons binge?
Just the thought should make all of us cringe.
Can we trust NRA,
To be honest when they,
Are the voice of a lunatic fringe?
Barriere, B.C., Canada
In a tale of pro cycling woe,
Doping brought down a mighty hero.
But one detail I find,
Really frazzles my mind,
Who knew Oprah still had her own show?
Fort Wayne, Ind.
Although your new limerick contest is thrillin’,
My brain appears not to be willin’
When every new verse
Than the last one is worse.
Perhaps you should just call Calvin Trillin.
Some red states want rules remade
the next time elections are played
I say, where’s the need?
Just go and secede
then call to request foreign aid.
I feel sorry for poor Manti Te’O.
Turns out his sweetie pie wasn’t reo.
It was just his best friend,
Playing those tricks again,
“I’m not gay,” Manti says – oh, pleo.
Key West, Fla.
The NRA’s Wayne LaPierre,
Waves his AR-15 in the air.
Claiming “guns don’t kill people!
But some drug dealing creep will,
Unless we arm kids in daycare!”
Dix Hills, N.Y.
Aghast we all heard from the Pope,
To continue His role, He’d said nope.
A change of His heart,
(Surgery was a part),
Six hundred years broken (we’ll cope.)
The role of the teacher gets bigger,
In ways that I simply can’t figger.
Teach reading and writing,
And make math exciting,
But also be quick on the trigger?
In a Salon piece I read by Sirota,
Ryan’s budget exceeds every quota,
Of upper class’ perks,
As the rich get the works.
It kicks the middle-class right in the scrota.
Will abandoning the weapons ban help gun safety?
The size of the pistol one packs,
Relates, if you must know the facts,
To being devoid,
To quote my friend Freud,
Of that which belongs in one’s slacks.
Thanks for sending in your limericks. We’ll be starting another new feature soon. Watch this space.
Alex Halperin is news editor at Salon. You can follow him on Twitter @alexhalperin.More Alex Halperin.
NASA astronaut Mike Hopkins
On December 28, 2013, Expedition 38 crew member Mike Hopkins participating in the second of two space walks to replace a degraded pump module on the International Space Station. (NASA astronaut Rick Mastracchio is reflected in his helmet!)
The Soyuz TMA-10M
The Soyuz TMA-10M headed towards the International Space Station with crew members from Expedition 37 onboard.
40 years ago the Apollo 8 mission flew up to the moon, orbited it ten times and then returned to Earth. This picture was taken from that flight and shows the Earth as it seemingly rises in similar fashion to a sunrise.
Sunrise from Expedition 36
NASA Flight Engineer Karen L. Nyberg of Expedition 36 took this photo of the sun rising -- a sight they saw nearly 16 times per day due to the speed of the International Space Station's orbit around the earth.
A pair of NanoRacks CubeSats -- nanosattelite spacecrafts carrying experiments -- were launched by Expedition 38.