2014's fast food atrocities
Burger King's black cheeseburger: Made with squid ink and bamboo charcoal, arguably a symbol of meat's destructive effect on the planet. Only available in Japan.
Someone with a serious ax to grind against Elon Musk and his electric car company has been leaving fliers on Teslas parked in San Francisco, urging drivers to give the cars back — if, that is, they don’t want to be the kind of person who supports organized crime.
The allegations are as perplexing as they are wide-ranging: They accuse the company of “manipulating Congress” and expound on the risk of the cars’ lithium-ion batteries exploding whenever they get wet or “bumped” (to be fair, lithium ion batteries have been known to burst into flames, although past incidents involving Tesla occurred not with a bump, but when the battery pack was slammed by a large metallic object).
Tech journalist Ryan Block tweeted out a copy (a larger version can be read here):
“Anonymous fliers making outlandish claims aren’t exactly new in San Francisco,” SF Gate helpfully points out. But these specific claims are particularly outlandish: Not only did Tesla help instigate a war that began two years before the company was founded, according to the fliers, it’s also formed a silent partnership with Google. As for the people behind the wheel? “Psychographic, demographic and marketing studies have been published showing that Tesla drivers have a higher-than-average inclination toward drugs, strange sexual behavior and risk.” And they likely have a bad case of anal itch.
Lindsay Abrams is a staff writer at Salon, reporting on all things sustainable. Follow her on Twitter @readingirl, email firstname.lastname@example.org.More Lindsay Abrams.
Domino's Specialty Chicken: It's like regular pizza, except instead of a crust, there's fried chicken. The company's marketing officer calls it "one of the most creative, innovative menu items we have ever had” -- brain power put to good use.
KFC'S ZINGER DOUBLE DOWN KING: A sandwich made by adding a burger patty to the infamous chicken-instead-of-buns creation can only be described using all caps. NO BUN ALL MEAT. Only available in South Korea.
Taco Bell's Waffle Taco: It took two years for Taco Bell to develop this waffle folded in the shape of a taco, the stand-out star of its new breakfast menu.
Krispy Kreme Triple Cheeseburger: Only attendees at the San Diego County Fair were given the opportunity to taste the official version of this donut-hamburger-heart attack combo. The rest of America has reasonable odds of not dropping dead tomorrow.
Taco Bell's Quesarito: A burrito wrapped in a quesadilla inside an enigma. Quarantined to one store in Oklahoma City.