2014's fast food atrocities
Burger King's black cheeseburger: Made with squid ink and bamboo charcoal, arguably a symbol of meat's destructive effect on the planet. Only available in Japan.
Texas governor Rick Perry, who was indicted last week for allegedly abusing the powers of his office, is turning his legal woes into a fundraising opportunity — as any quick-thinking politician would. Perry’s political action committee, RickPAC, is now officially selling limited edition “Rick Perry mugshot” T-shirts. Get one today (or don’t) in exchange for a $25 contribution to aid Republican congressional candidates around the country.
The shirts, which feature a black-and-white reproduction of Perry’s now-infamous mugshot on the front, claim the governor is “Wanted (For securing the border and defeating Democrats).” On the back, the tees feature a second mugshot — that of Travis County Democratic District Attorney Rosemary Lehmberg, who was found guilty of drunk driving last year. When Lehmberg refused Perry’s calls to resign, the governor threatened to veto funding for state prosecutors to investigate corruption charges. He then carried out the veto, which is exactly why he is currently under indictment.
Shirts come in multiple sizes, but Perry’s mugshot probably will never look as good splayed across anyone’s chest as it does Ryan Gosling’s.
Domino's Specialty Chicken: It's like regular pizza, except instead of a crust, there's fried chicken. The company's marketing officer calls it "one of the most creative, innovative menu items we have ever had” -- brain power put to good use.
KFC'S ZINGER DOUBLE DOWN KING: A sandwich made by adding a burger patty to the infamous chicken-instead-of-buns creation can only be described using all caps. NO BUN ALL MEAT. Only available in South Korea.
Taco Bell's Waffle Taco: It took two years for Taco Bell to develop this waffle folded in the shape of a taco, the stand-out star of its new breakfast menu.
Krispy Kreme Triple Cheeseburger: Only attendees at the San Diego County Fair were given the opportunity to taste the official version of this donut-hamburger-heart attack combo. The rest of America has reasonable odds of not dropping dead tomorrow.
Taco Bell's Quesarito: A burrito wrapped in a quesadilla inside an enigma. Quarantined to one store in Oklahoma City.