King Kaufman's Sports Daily

The ice is jammed with broken heroes: Springsteen to host a curling reality show? That's rockstar.

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Feb. 13, 2008 | The problem with "Rockstar Curling," the reality show that the Toronto Star reports NBC is planning to air, is that it's redundant.

Curling is rockstar, baby. It's rocketship. It's monkeylove, darling.

The Star reports that the Peacock has an exclusive option to air the 10-week series, the aim of which will be to form and train a team that will compete for the U.S. championship and a spot in the 2010 Olympics in Vancouver. The hook, the "Rockstar" part, is that the show's producers are trying to get Bruce Springsteen or Jon Bon Jovi involved, possibly as hosts.

"According to sources," Star columnist Chris Zelkovich writes, "the two rock stars are among a group of entertainment types who rent arena time on occasion to pick up brooms instead of guitars."

We will now pause, right here on the brink of like half a dozen zingers about curling, which I love but which according to typists union rules must be zinged in American publications, and another couple about how Bon Jovi trading in his guitar for a broom would constitute the Olympic Movement's greatest contribution to civilization, for a brief meditation on celebrity.

From time to time this column has noted that we, the public, really can't know public figures through their portrayal in the media, though it often feels like we do. This isn't exactly an earth-shattering or original observation, but it's accompanied by insouciant hand gestures you can't see that give it a little oomph.

One of my favorite stories to illustrate this point was my own occasional mid-'80s observations of ballplayer George Hendrick, who had a reputation as a surly guy, largely because he refused to speak to the media. He didn't speak to me, but I couldn't help noticing whenever I was around him that he seemed to get along famously with his teammates. It was an early object lesson for me that the media can distort as well as illuminate.

Another favorite story of mine involves Springsteen himself acknowledging the phenomenon. I have a bootleg recording of a concert at which a woman yells out "I love you, Bruce!" After a little cheer dies down in the crowd, Springsteen says, "But you don't really know me."

Next page: Alternate hosting choices: Toby Keith, Picabo Street and one idea better than both