King Kaufman's Sports Daily

Brett Favre (circle one) might/might not come back. And we (circle one) care/want to strangle him. Plus: Pool o' Experts winner.

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April 11, 2008 | I thought this was going to finally be the NFL offseason without the Brett Favre diva act, the will-he-won't-he melodrama of just how Citizen Brett will spend the following autumn. He made the announcement. Done deal. He was going to spend this fall and all the falls to come riding his tractor around in Mississippi. Great!

The peace and quiet lasted five weeks.

There he was Tuesday on the Web site of his hometown paper, the Biloxi Sun-Herald, speculating about a possible return.

"It would be hard to pass up, I guess," he told reporter Al Jones, who was working with Favre on the foreword for a book the paper is producing about the local star. Jones had asked him what he'd do should the Green Bay Packers call during the season and ask him to take over because of injuries. "But three months from now, say that presents itself, I may say, you know what, I'm so glad I made that decision."

Yes, you may say that, Brett, but until that moment: Shut up! Shut up shut up shut up! Shut! Up!

The paper referenced the speculation that's filled airwaves and column inches since Favre's March 4 retirement that he wouldn't stay retired, that he'd feel the old football urge over the summer and be there in training camp just like always.

"Favre has remained largely silent," the Sun-Herald wrote, "preferring to let others debate the issue of his retirement."

Yeah, for 35 whole days.

Look, I love me some Brett Favre, really I do. I have to. It's in the union contract for sportswriters. And I get that he was asked the question.

But after years of clogging up the spring and summer sports news with his annoying Hamlet routine, he owed it to us all to say, "I'm retired, and that's that."

I applaud the openness. I appreciate the honesty. But at long last, sir, please shut up and go ride your tractor. If you decide to come back at some point, trust me, we won't miss it. Your name will make the papers.

In the meantime, it shouldn't. You might want to start getting used to that.

Next page: NCAA Tournament Pool o' Experts shocker: Non-expert wins!