The man on the other line emits a dry, high-pitched exhalation, somewhere between a sob and a squeal. Akara throws her head back and laughs, revealing pearly pink gums.

“Harder,” she demands. “Do it again or I’m gonna call your wife.”

He cries harder, his breathing more ragged. “No,” he pleads. “No.”

“Are you crying?” Akara asks. She titters, covering her mouth with one hand like a cartoon schoolgirl.

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Created by Scott Garner, a master's degree candidate in the interactive telecommunications department at NYU, Hell Is Other People relies on the same technology as Foursquare, an app that allows people to "check in" at various establishments to display their location to other users. Unlike Foursquare, which aims to maximize the possibility of face-to-face interaction, Hell Is Other People displays the locations of others, as well as the best routes you can take for how to avoid them.

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In the midst of all the accolades, one wondered what Bill McKibben, one of the nation’s leading environmentalists (and Obama critics on the environment), would have to say about it. The head of the advocacy organization, 350.org, McKibben has sharply criticized what he has referred to as President Obama’s “waffling and contradictory” climate policy, particularly his refusal to take a stand on the Keystone pipeline, which would carry oil from the tar sands of Alberta 1,200 miles to the Gulf of Mexico. Yet for McKibben, the speech on Tuesday seems to have represented a turning point in the President’s stance on climate change. “I thought he was straightforward, forthright, and clear,” McKibben told Salon.

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Some people used Gandolfini's passing as an opportunity to try out fledgling stand-up material, cracking wise about the infamous "Sopranos" finale, in which Tony Soprano orders a side of onion rings before the screen fades to black:

RIP James Gandolfini cause of heart attack maybe onion rings for the table wasn't best choice

— Jim Stevenson (@jimanardo) June 20, 2013

Who knew the biggest threat to James Gandolfini in the Sopranos finale was the onion rings? http://t.co/XGtaopxbPD #rip #jamesgandolfini — Proper Bitch (@aproperbitch) June 20, 2013

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This happened in December 1968, when angry Philadelphia Eagles fans, possibly having had a beer or two, took aim at Santa during halftime. But the New York Times won't let the city -- or any of us -- forget it.

Whether it stems from resentment over New York not having invented the cheesesteak or just good old-fashioned hackery, the Grey Lady has consistently referred to Philly as "the city that booed Santa Claus" -- and we're talking twice in the last week. Occasionally, the reference will come up completely out of context, even when the Times isn't writing about Philadelphia at all. And sometimes, the writer even admits being unable to resist the cliche.

What really scares us about this list? It means they'll probably still be comparing things to "Portlandia" in 2052.

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SFGate reports that an increasing number of local hooligans are kicking open the back doors of Muni buses and jumping out while they're in motion. A bus operator says that kids refer to the activity as "riding the surf," which supposedly derives from the participant hanging onto the side of the bus while it's moving.

At first, Municipal Transportation Agency officials theorized that passengers were jumping off the back of the bus because they were too impatient to wait for the next stop. As it turned out, that explanation was only slightly less stupid than what was actually going on: Between May 30 and June 9, there have been 15 recorded incidents of bus riders leaping through the back doors at speeds of up to 25 miles per hour, indicating a disturbing new trend.

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Reportedly inspired by a joke George Clooney made during an interview -- "I got [my balls] unwrinkled. It's the newest thing in Hollywood, ball ironing," he cracked to an Esquire reporter last January -- a Santa Monica spa has started offering a service known as "tackle-tightening." The 45-minute procedure uses lasers to correct discoloration and remove hair and wrinkles on the scrotum, making your balls look as shiny and new as a pair of Christmas ornaments.

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Although the Treasury Department attempted to pass a law requiring alcohol companies to include nutritional labels in 2007, for the time being the labeling regulation is optional. Yet a surprising number of hard liquor companies are embracing the decision, viewing it as an opportunity to target calorie-conscious consumers.

Hard liquor companies, for instance, have been lobbying the bureau for more than a decade, urging them to adopt the regulation so they can advertise their products' low calorie and carbohydrate content. 

Via ABC News:

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Via the Daily News:

“Lifestyle clauses are on the rise,” said New York City-based matrimonial attorney Robert Wallack, who represented Christie Brinkley and Damon Dash, among others, in recent high-profile divorces.

“It used to be for better or worse, and you went with it. Now people want to dictate how the couple will live within the marriage.”

The agreements, also known as "love contracts," have reportedly been embraced by celebrity couples such as Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas, who reportedly signed a pre-nuptial agreement where she would earn $5 million if he cheated on her; Mark Zuckerberg's wife Priscilla Chan, who purportedly made the Facebook mogul sign a lifestyle clause stipulating that he would spend at least one night and "100 minutes of quality time" with her a week.

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The International Group for Historic Aircraft Recovery took the sonar images last summer during an expedition to Nikumaroro, a former British colony in the Pacific Ocean. Although the images are grainy, TIGHAR says they indicate an "anomaly" 600 feet below the ocean's surface.

"It looks unlike anything else in the sonar data," a TIGHAR bulletin on the organization's website reads. "It’s the right size, it’s the right shape, and it’s in the right place."

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Since I was 3 years old, my family has visited Walt Disney World almost every year. We’re one of those families that refuses to vacation anywhere else. We consider getting a beer at each of EPCOT’s national pavilions a horizon broadening experience. When I was little, we waited in line to do meet-and-greets with the Disney princesses. I’d approach Belle in her iridescent gown, or Ariel in her brassiere made of bivalve remains, and present them with my autograph book, marveling at how cheerful, and dainty and ladylike they were. As a neurotic, tomboyish 7-year-old, I found them nothing less than magical.

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The process works like this: for a fee ($200 for a work on paper, $500 for an oil on canvas), the exhibitionistically inclined can arrange brief private sittings with Finley. They'll be given the artist's private phone number and can snap away. Once Finley has received the photos, she'll translate them into a series of paintings to be publicly displayed in the New Museum lobby. After the exhibition closes on May 26, the subjects can take home their work to be stored as a memento of free-spirited youth, or hung in the living room to the chagrin of friends and family.

Finley, a professor at New York University's Tisch School of the Arts, has never shied away from controversy. In 1990, she was one of four artists whose NEA grants were revoked on the grounds that their work was obscene. "Sext Me If You Can" is presented by NE 4 In Residence, which revisits the four grant recipients' work.

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Like the fairy-tale forest that turns out to be something more akin to a Hieronymous Bosch painting, Amy Schumer is far less virtuous than she appears. The comedian, whose series "Inside Amy Schumer" premieres on Comedy Central April 30, boasts one of the most subversive voices in comedy, imbuing riffs on porn, abortion and below-the-belt grooming (she refers to bikini waxing as “getting my vagina ready for its first quinceañera”) with a sly, oddly poignant sensibility. A bit from "Mostly Sex Stuff," on hooking up with a man without testicles, is particularly illustrative: “Girls don’t care about balls, but when they’re not there we miss them. You know, they’re like grandparents.”

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The sinkhole, located at 9600 South Houston Ave., started expanding at approximately 5 a.m. Thursday morning, quickly growing from 20 to 40 feet. Two cars fell into the hole before the fire department arrived at the scene at 5:30 a.m., and a third car fell in after responders had left.

According to witnesses, the injured man had attempted to swerve around the sinkhole as it was expanding, which led to his car falling into the hole. He was taken to Northwestern Memorial Hospital after sustaining minor head injuries, and is said to be in good condition.

A spokesman for the Water Department said the sinkhole was created by a water main break, due to heavy flooding in the area.

Via KTLA:

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From the missed connections to the casual encounters, here's a SFW (more or less) sampling of the those citizens who know that it's only when they lose their carnal desires that the terrorists have really won.

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I realize it might sound callous to argue that the death of one celebrity merits more attention than another, particularly when one was a leader of the free world while the other was chiefly famous for showing her navel in a series of films that the New York Times called “the answers to a moron’s prayer.” While it’s mostly meant in jest, I will say that at one point in my life, Annette Funicello meant a great deal to me, and certainly more than the Iron Lady ever has or will. And if she meant a lot to me, a child of the aughts who was born decades after her original audience hit puberty, I can’t even imagine how her fans from previous generations must be feeling right now.

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My parents and all the other gay and lesbian people here want to be happy, just like you. All they want is to be treated fairly. But unlike most of you, they have to come again here year after year and explain over and over why their love is equal to yours. This year, you have the opportunity to change that. I say, choose love. 

Lannon's mother Maryellen Butke says the 12 year old wrote his speech the night before the 12-hour hearing, which lasted until 5 a.m. Friday:

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The news could not come at a more opportune time for Lauer, who has spent the week fending off rumors that he's about to be ousted from the "Today" show. According to the Post, the "Today" show, which has suffered from a ratings decline in recent months, is not expected to renew Lauer's $25-million-a-year contract with NBC when it expires in 2015 -- which coincides with the end of Trebek's three-decade tenure as "Jeopardy!" host.

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Yet if reports from the Local, an English-language French newspaper, are to be trusted, that's exactly where scores of enterprising smut peddlars are headed. Recently, the historic Catacombs of Paris has become a popular destination for adult filmmakers, models, and photographers, who are heading sixty feet underground to shoot against the backdrop of millions of human skulls and skeletons.

A spokesman for the Musee Carnavelet, the company that manages the catacombs, says that they receive at least one request for permission to film or take photos there every week. Perhaps unsurprisingly, they are not at all pleased with this trend.

“Obviously, we say no. This is a sacred place, which houses the remains of six million Parisians. We only allow serious or scientific documentaries,” the spokesman said. 

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