Not at all true.

"You are a good wife and mother."

Even less true; I was there with my adult daughter, a darling blond 22-year-old who didn't need mothering, and I hadn't had a husband around for years. "For Samoans, age isn't important. Only the love is important," he said when I pointed out the blinding difference in our ages. He was a waiter at Aggie Grey's Hotel in Samoa. I was a guest on my last day in the country, and I just wanted to lie by the pool and try not to think about flying away from this paradise. He had been standing in the sun's heat for 45 minutes, holding his tray and trying to persuade me to meet him in my hotel room. I was amused, but not at all tempted. He was sweet, a tall Samoan with a really nice smile and cocoa-colored skin. He was also younger than any of my children -- and seemingly out of his mind. About 6 feet away a retired Australian couple lay silent, lapping it all up.

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