The Great First-Baby-of-the-Millennium Race

Fri, 24 Dec 1999 17:00:00 +0000

My baby is due Jan. 1, 2000, which puts him in the running for coronation as First Baby of the Millennium. There are people who think that would be a good thing. So many -- rumored, at least -- that my hospital has been anxiously surveying obstetricians' offices, counting up the potential customers.

So far, there aren't a lot more charts on the schedule than the average Jan. 1. But that doesn't account for the overeager attention-seekers who will show up before their first contractions and demand Pitosin. Nor does it take into consideration the truly determined, who will no doubt gather outside the surgery suite, and just as the rest of the world is counting down the final seconds of the year, demand C-sections.

Not that it wouldn't be sweet to pass along a birthday of 01/01/00. Very digital. It certainly beats the also-ran indignity of a lifetime filling out forms with DOB: 12/29/99.

But there's no winning this game. Think about the technical difficulties alone. Will every wristwatch in every delivery room be precisely calibrated? Will nurses who diligently fill out birth certificates be encouraged, with the aid of a fat envelope and a wink, to subtract a minute or two?

Salon.com > Leah Eskin

The Great First-Baby-of-the-Millennium Race