Gwyneth's hunks get stripped

A recent Cosmopolitan survey revealed serious new information about its readers' libidinal tastes.

Published October 20, 1999 4:00PM (EDT)

Oct. 20, 1999

What has Gwyneth Paltrow seen that women want a glimpse of? Hmm ... an Oscar, with her name on the envelope? No. A petite, pert proboscis in the mirror? Oodles of dough in the bank? Guess again. If a recent survey on Cosmopolitan gives any indication, it's Gwyneth's private life that has women most curious. After all, she's burrowed into the briefs of our era's most hungered-after hunks.

Cosmo's current "Undress Your Date" interactive game invites carnally-curious women to "unclothe" helpless virtual men. Hand-shaped icons -- steered lasciviously by your mouse -- allow you to passionately paw the garments off a gallery of glamorous cyber guys.

Yesterday, the lusty-lady mag tallied up the 13,000 disrobings the irresistible males received. Who's got the bod women really want to see in the buff? Ben Affleck, Gwyneth's recent beau, came in first. Brad Pitt, her former fiance, was a close runner up. (Although Cosmopolitan doesn't list the losers, Business Wire Inc. reported this detail.)

The pair of ex-Paltrow paramours were culled from a pool of Hollywood studs she's presumably never slept with: George Clooney, Tom Cruise, Brendan Fraser, Will Smith, Leonardo di Caprio, Taye Diggs, Ricky Martin and Joseph Fiennes. (At least Fiennes gently mauled her in "Shakespeare In Love.")

Gwyneth's virtual ex-bedmates aren't available online anymore. Instead, Cosmo has replaced them with "occupational" dates: a businessman, a cowboy, an artist, a frat boy and a red-hot fireman who is getting his "rubbers" rapidly removed by inflamed women who need hosing off.

By Hank Hyena

Hank Hyena is a former columnist for SF Gate, and a frequent contributor to Salon.

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