The Wolf ad Blitzer, uh, blitz

By David Talbot
Published October 23, 2004 3:43PM (EDT)

The new Bush-Cheney TV spot, featuring big bad wolves in the forest, has sent shivers through some voters. Others are, well, howling with laughter. But some Democrats think the Kerry campaign must respond quickly with its own fear ad. Here's something that might work.

Opening shot of deep, dark forest. We hear soul-chilling sounds from the woods, the ravenous wail of hungry beasts.

Cut to: a village in a clearing, like the one in the M. Night Shyamalan movie, the one whose trailer was much creepier than the actual movie. We see young men and women -- draft-age men and women -- looking with fear-stricken faces toward the woods. We see their panicked mothers and fathers begin to rush their children indoors.

Cut to: the edge of the forest. We see a pack of wolves emerge menacingly from the trees, their fangs gleaming brightly. The camera closes in on them and we suddenly see that each furry carnivore has a face that looks exactly like the Deputy Secretary of Defense!

Voice-over: "Lock up your children, the Wolfowitzes are coming."

Fade to: A man in a dapper white suit and matching hat, who says, "I'm Tom Wolfe, and I approve this ad."

OK, maybe the last part wouldn't work. But you get the idea. Have a better one? Send us a letter at

David Talbot

David Talbot, the founder of Salon, is the author of New York Times bestsellers like "Brothers," "The Devil's Chessboard," and "Season of the Witch." His most recent book is "Between Heaven and Hell: The Story of My Stroke."

MORE FROM David TalbotFOLLOW davidtalbot

Related Topics ------------------------------------------

War Room