The Fix

Prank: Star Jones will work for food -- and $125,000. Angelina, Nicole scorned. Plus: Tonya Harding's latest woe.

Published October 26, 2005 1:10PM (EDT)

Morning Briefing:
Guns, who's got 'em: Page Six has a juicy item about how Hollywood liberals love to pack heat. "It's fascinating that Hollywood is so hypocritical," John Milius, the screenwriter behind "Apocalypse Now," tells the paper. "Many people own [guns], but consistently vote against them and never talk about them. I used to shoot with Spielberg and [Robert] Zemeckis and Robert Stack. But no one else would admit they had any." But the real story is the story's frightening breakdown of stars who carry guns (or at least have weapons permits). There are some nonsurprises on the list -- Steven Seagal, Sylvester Stallone, Robert De Niro and Harvey Keitel -- and some that are truly scary: Donald Trump, Howard Stern and Don Imus. Meanwhile newly crowned Bond actor Daniel Craig (in a move the spy series' P.R. flacks mustn't be too happy about) says he plain can't stand guns. "I hate handguns. Handguns are used to shoot people and as long as they are around, people will shoot each other." (Page Six, This Is London via Drudge)

Beware the wrath of Brangelina: Angelina Jolie is none too happy with her "Beowulf" costar, Ray Winstone. Winstone last week leaked something about Jolie getting married, and now she's refusing to go back to the set until he apologizes. A source, speaking to Hollywood.com, said, "It's left poor Robert Zemeckis (director) in an awful position  The film's on hold until Angelina and Ray settle their differences. They're both so stubborn no one knows who'll win." (I Don't Like You in That Way)

A Kidman scorned: It was only a matter of time until these sorts of stories started coming out, depicting a "distraught" Nicole Kidman reeling from the announcement of the forthcoming baby TomKat. A friend tells the U.K.'s Grazia magazine: "Nicole can't believe it's happening. It was so sudden she shut down. Obviously she must still have feelings for Tom, she's been crying and has been really upset." The implication is that there will be a mothering battle somewhere down the line between Katie and Nicole: "This baby means Katie Holmes will be in Tom's life forever. Nicole always cherished the special bond adopting gave her and Tom. Now he will share that bond with Katie." (FemaleFirst)

Putting a price tag on dignity: You might find it funny, you might find it cruel, but either way, Radar magazine's prank conversation with Star Jones' agent -- wherein they attempt to book her for an eating contest -- points to one lasting truth: Stars make an obscene amount of money from doing "appearances." The price for Jones' participation starts at $25,000 and moves quickly to $50,000 and then higher, with her agent at one point saying, "Make a hundred-grand offer and I'll get her to do everything on your list except strip." The final price tag is even higher:

Radar: That's it. The dining with guests, the eating contest, working as a dealer, dancing, singing a cappella at brunch, and arm wrestling. So what's the number? I want her to say yes.

Agent: I'd say $125,000 

Radar: But for $125,000 

Agent: She'll eat as much as she can 

(Radar Online)

Also:
Tonya Harding is back in the news, though this time as the victim. Her boyfriend/roommate Christopher Nolan (not to be confused with the film director) was arrested after a fight at her house in Vancouver. Harding initially called 911 to say two masked men had broken in and assaulted her. The Associated Press' airy description of Nolan's version: "Harding threw him down and bit his finger when he said she had too much to drink on Sunday. The 27-year-old Nolan was ordered to stay away from Harding and to avoid alcohol" ... Things got a little too real on the set of "Miami Vice" when a guy trying to get into the hotel where the movie is being filmed in the Dominican Republic pulled a gun and was shot by a soldier guarding the set. No one else was hurt ... For some reason, Amazon.com let Al Franken film a little video short promoting his new book, "The Truth (With Jokes)," and post it on the site. And for some reason, the skit ends with a conservative reader getting a bottle to the head ... It's not all peaches and cream being a celebrity gossip columnist -- just ask New York Daily News columnist Lloyd Grove. A source tells Page Six that Grove's boss, Daily News publisher Martin Dunn, accidentally forwarded the gossip scribe a nasty e-mail he'd written to People magazine managing editor Larry Hackett as an apology for an item Grove wrote last week (and that the Fix picked up) about People trying to stop the presses over their screw-up with a Jennifer Aniston look-alike on the cover. "Lloyd Grove is a [bleep]ing idiot," Dunn wrote. "His page is stupid" ... Rapper DMX may be facing prison time: Since smashing his SUV into a parking gate at JFK Airport in June 2004, he's been on conditional release, meaning any further car-related antics could land him in jail. In court on Tuesday, he admitted to two major violations since then, speeding at 104 mph and getting into an accident with an unmarked police car. His sentencing is set for mid-November  Marlon Brando's son Christian testified in Robert Blake's civil trial on Tuesday -- sort of. Brando, whom Blake's lawyers have hinted they think was actually behind Bonny Lee Bakley's murder, appeared on the stand but pleaded the Fifth for just about everything beyond giving his name. Bakley, before Blake agreed to marry her, had tried to convince Brando that the baby she was carrying belonged to him. In another weird twist in the trial, jurors got to take a fun-filled field trip to the restaurant in Los Angeles where Bakley's murder took place.

Money Quote:
Nicolas Cage, on the profound experience of seeing a cobra during filming for "Lord of War" in South Africa: "That night, I went home and I had a dream about the snake and I thought, 'Man, I'd like to have a snake waist. That animal has a 2-inch waist, I'd like to be snake-waisted.' I'm a 32, so I've been working out ever since." (ContactMusic)

Turn On:
It's the season-one finale of the war drama "Over There" (FX, 10 p.m. EDT). Rick Sebak, whose documentaries usually focus on happy subjects like hot dogs, ice cream and amusement parks, takes a tour of American graveyards in "A Cemetery Special" (PBS, check local listings).

-- Scott Lamb

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