Another day, another awesome press release.
Today's, headlined "My Cup Overfloweth," is about the Evolution bra, a creation of brastraps.com, a company that first arrived on the scene selling fashion accessory bra straps. Now, it's raking in the big bucks with its Evolution by Margarita garment, the "world's first bra designed to mimic the appearance of cosmetic breast implants."
The press release claims that six weeks after Evolution's debut in 2005, all 2,000 of the brassieres were sold out and a waiting list was formed for A and D cups.
Now the company's offering a double-D bra. For all those double-Ds out there who are just dying to get a bigger rack!
Whoops, no, I've misunderstood. "Our larger bras will offer an excellent lift and improved shape, without necessarily increasing size," says marketing director Jeff Reis in the press release.
The release also quotes a plastic surgeon, the aptly named Dr. Daniel Man, as saying, "Plastic surgery and the desire to appear cosmetically enhanced is still a burgeoning trend. We perform hundreds of breast augmentations yearly on women who aren't satisfied with what they have. Women with smaller chests want to look larger. Women with larger chests want to appear more lifted. Many women have larger breasts but with an undesirable shape. Their breasts may be bottom heavy, which contributes to 'saggy breasts.'"
Thank God for the Evolution bra, which "features a graduated cup specifically designed to maximize the existing breast tissue by lifting and separating each breast, providing the coveted 'separated lift' associated with a good pair of cosmetic breast implants."
Evolution bras are 44 bucks a pop. And the craziest thing? I have one sitting on my desk. I ordered it after I first heard about them back in 2005, thinking I might write a story about it, but haven't yet. It comes in its own bag, and is padded with disturbingly firm but liquid graduated inserts.
I have to confess that mostly, all this just blows my mind. Isn't the point of a good boob job to look "real"? At what point did we agree to mimic the synthetic? Does it have anything to do with Melanie Griffith's lips?