Bye-bye, baby

What was the final straw in your relationship? Table Talkers share the lines that spelled the end of the affair, this week.

Published February 24, 2006 11:48AM (EST)

Private Life

The Comment That Made Him/Her an Ex.

Tessie - 07:22 am Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006

"We're too old to worry about being sexy anymore."

"This brain tumor of yours is happening at a really bad time for me; I've got a lot going on at work right now."

"How can you be unhappy? I have everything I want."

Yes, these are actual comments made to me by my actual ex. What are yours?

Blue Bunny - 07:40 am Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006 - #1 of 192

"I want to watch you have sex with someone else."

"Can you give me those earrings so I can give them to my next girlfriend?"

"No one will ever love you but me."

Tinsel - 07:44 am Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006 - #3 of 192

"I'd take you home to meet my parents, but they'd wonder what the attraction was."

jenbynight - 08:05 am Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006 - #10 of 192

"I put you on the spreadsheet, but you'll be in a parenthetical until we have sex." -- from the guy that keeps a spreadsheet of the women he's dated/flirted with/etc., so he can keep them straight in his head.

I'm still in a parenthetical, thank you very much.

JoMN - 08:37 am Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006 - #18 of 192

"You know, you dress like someone a lot fatter than you really are."

Aspidistra - 08:43 am Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006 - #20 of 192

If we got married, I could move out of my parents' house and I'd save a lot on car insurance.

cjgriffin - 10:20 am Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006 - #41 of 192

"At your weight, there aren't that many guys who would want you."

c-beth - 10:53 am Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006 - #47 of 192

"I have feelings ... deep feelings ... for you. But, now, I have to TRANSFER those feelings to someone else. Thanks for understanding."

greenjay - 11:10 am Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006 - #52 of 192

"Will you finish my taxes before we file for divorce?"

Tessie - 11:37 am Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006 - #68 of 192

"Did you notice I didn't get you anything for Valentine's Day?"

"You've never gotten me anything for Valentine's Day."

"Yes, but this time, I deliberately didn't get you anything."

EllaL - 12:19 pm Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006 - #87 of 192

From my one and only experience dating a Catholic boy in high school:

"My relationship with you is interfering with my relationship with God."

So sorry to get in the way...

Bonita - 01:26 pm Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006 - #107 of 192

Me: "I'm going to my parent's house -- my mom's only got a few more hours to live and I want to be with her."

Him: "Uh, I've got tickets to the drag races. Mind if I go there while you're at your mom's?"

Maneki Neko - 02:25 pm Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006 - #120 of 192

Oh, I totally forgot senior prom (my date wasn't my boyfriend, but I wanted him to be):

Him: "I like you and I think you're attractive. But I can't hang out with you because, well, there's this social hierarchy at our school, which is unfortunate, but basically, I can't be seen in public with you."

Calif Transplant - 03:22 pm Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006 - #134 of 192

Me, observing him gazing at me in an odd manner: "What are you thinking about? Why are you staring at me?"

Him: "I'm just thinking about how flawed you are."

Calamity Jeanne - 05:36 pm Pacific Time - Feb 22, 2006 - #151 of 192

Him, on our third date (we've been out for drinks and are now sitting in his apartment, having just smoked some extremely good weed): Oh, by the way, I meant to tell you: Don't get too attached to me. I have other girlfriends.

Me, getting up and putting on my jacket: Is that right? OK, I won't. See ya. Bye.

(slam)

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