To breed or not to breed

10 reasons not to have kids and 10 reasons to reproduce, this week in Table Talk.

Published April 21, 2006 8:00AM (EDT)

Private Life

Parent or Child-Free: The Road Not Taken

Zak - 11:46 am Pacific Time - Apr 18, 2006 - #691 of 729

10 reasons you would like/not like to have a kid. Go.

Verbal Remedy - 01:00 pm Pacific Time - Apr 18, 2006 - #692 of 731

10. Nobody under the age of 10 will ever throw up on me.

Zak - 01:08 pm Pacific Time - Apr 18, 2006 - #693 of 729

9. When I have bags under my eyes they are the result of staying out too late at a pub with friends.

MissyBoo - 01:16 pm Pacific Time - Apr 18, 2006 - #694 of 729

8. I don't have to worry about finding "the best" schools.

Karenem - 01:19 pm Pacific Time - Apr 18, 2006 - #695 of 729

7. Taking sick time/vacation when I want to instead of when the daycare provider does.

Zak - 01:31 pm Pacific Time - Apr 18, 2006 - #696 of 729

6. Avoiding the obligation to find a kid-friendly event, location, dvd etc. for my leisure time.

5. A sense that I'm fulfilling my obligations to the next generation by leaving a smaller eco-footprint (i.e. fewer consumers).

4. Fewer financial worries about my current and future life.

clemencedane - 01:52 pm Pacific Time - Apr 18, 2006 - #699 of 729

3. No risk of ruining someone's psyche.

Zak - 02:21 pm Pacific Time - Apr 18, 2006 - #700 of 729

2. Not having to build a tolerance for screaming babies or children, or equally exasperating loud activities. I think some of my earliest child-free thoughts were due to my intolerance for noise.

1. Not having to spend my time thinking and worrying about what will be good for the kid (child-rearing techniques, health, neighborhood, etc.).

I'm sure there are many more reasons, what are yours? And those on the "childed" side, what are the benefits you think I should consider?

(I'm not trying to stir up a flame war, I'm seriously contemplating this issue.)

Jen - 02:40 pm Pacific Time - Apr 18, 2006 - #701 of 729

OK, here's the first 10 that come to mind, mundane and profound all jumbled together:

1. Endless entertainment. I laugh far more often than I did before I had kids. They are damned funny people.

2. Get to learn about one of my favorite subjects, how humans learn, firsthand.

3. Get to explore another favorite interest, language acquisition, firsthand.

4. Have a reason to go to all the fun places you might not go without a child like kiddie amusement parks and museums.

5. The social aspects of parenting in this community -- lots of interaction with similar families and lots of stuff to do, and I feel connected with the place and schools and institutions more than I probably would have forced myself to do without the kids.

6. What the hell, I'll say it -- looking at them. I think my kids are beautiful (see link in prefs) and I sometimes can't believe I had anything to do with creating them.

7. Endorphins -- having a young child is kind of like the endorphin equivalent of falling in love, constantly. I'm constantly being reminded with a sort of emotional whoomph in my chest how much I adore them.

8. Giving birth. I'm very glad that I got to experience the amazing rush of pregnancy and childbirth. (I can also give you a list of 10 things I don't like about pregnancy and childbirth, but still, you have to admit, that a body can do that is pretty damned amazing.)

9. The satisfaction of working at something that is difficult but worth doing well.

10. Making my husband a father. It's amazing to see him with them and wonderful to partner with him in this. We were a great couple, and I feared losing that, but I love us as parents too. It does take a lot more work sometimes, but difficult does not necessarily = bad.

11. Laughing toddler crawling into bed in the morning. It just does not get better than that.


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