Broadsheet has received, oh, approximately 1,000 press releases today from the organizers of the "Jugs Across America Tour," promoting their "Jingle Jugs" exhibit, which they're billing as "the world's only traveling breast museum ... bouncing to a city near you."
The tour, which stops at college football games around the country, will consist of "a convoy of vehicles, including a 53-[foot] semi-truck trailer" that will be "retrofitted inside as a combination bar/grille/art gallery" open to the public and displaying over 100 sets of plastic breasts (the aforementioned "Jingle Jugs") that have been decorated by artists. "Jingle Jugs" -- described by the press release as "a light-hearted homage to most men's 'best friends'" -- "move in rhythmic motion to a very popular song by Capitol Recording Artist and comedian Rodney Carrington." Some pairs of the breasts also come with recordable chips so that you can play your own tasteful message as the boobs gyrate.
I read the press release three times, and still didn't really understand what this thing is about except that it involves a bunch of mounted rubber ta-tas that sing and dance like the Big Mouth Bass. Also, that the whole shebang is cosponsored by Sigma Alpha Epsilon (the former fraternity of at least one Salon staff writer) and that the brotherhood is "using this product to raise funds for their national fraternity as well as for breast cancer research." So the writhing mams are all in the name of breast cancer research. And keeping SAE in Natty Light.
Anyway, these boys were damned eager for Broadsheet to write about the "Jingle Jugs." I called the spokesman to clarify a few points:
How are the Jingle Jugs decorated?"I believe they had some art students sort of be creative. Some [Jingle Jugs] are in different fashions -- like a wardrobe-malfunction one, a superhero-type one."
What is the "very popular song" by Capitol recording artist and comedian Rodney Carrington that is played while the Jingle Jugs move rhythmically? "It's, um, 'Titties and Beer.'"
So this bar/grill/art gallery in a semi that stops at football games -- it's pretty much tailgating, right? "Pretty much. At certain venues they're giving away pretzels and beers and wine for people to enjoy the museum."
How much does it cost to go into the breast museum or buy the Jingle Jugs? "I believe going into the museum should be free. If you just want the standard Jingle Jugs set you can get them online for $39.99. If you want the ones with the recordable chip in them, then they're $49.99. And I think certain artistic ones might eventually be auctioned off to raise more money for breast cancer."
What percentage of the money is going to breast cancer research and what percentage is going to the fine brothers of SAE? "If you buy then through Jingle Jugs, 10 percent of the sale goes through the philanthropy. If you buy them through the fraternity, then the fraternity and the philanthropy split that 10 percent 50-50."