Someday, bras will be writing this blog

"Intelligent bras" have sensors that adjust to the shape of your breasts. This is good news for women. And for the future!

By Sarah Hepola

Published December 11, 2007 7:35PM (EST)

Bras have been on my mind lately. (Also, on my back. Bah-DUM-dum.) I recently wrote a story about getting fitted for a bra. And today, what crosses my glittery pink desktop but a story about the "intelligent bra," a futuristic brassiere that has sensors in the fabric and adjusts for maximum comfort and support. Whoa, welcome to the future: No jet-pack, but supersonic lingerie! Women of all cup sizes can get behind this. The intelligent bra sounds like one of those Sharper Image chairs, but for your boobs. Ladies and gentlemen, I am so in. Now, whether you consider a healthy 33-year-old woman complaining about her giant rack to be interesting or totally annoying, you cannot argue with me that it makes exercise more difficult. As for running, I think I speak for large-breasted women everywhere when I say: "Ouch."

This exciting news about jet-pack bras follows a story from October about doctors in the U.K. working on a bra that actually detects cancer. This means that, in the future, my bras might actually be smarter and more supportive than 80 percent of the men I have dated. Huzzah!

In the meantime, one benefit of writing about having big boobs is that people e-mail you thoughts on where to shop. Tips for my big-busted sisters (and brothers!): The Le Mystere Dream Tisha Bra and the selection at And with that -- ta-ta for now.

Sarah Hepola

Sarah Hepola is the author of the New York Times bestselling memoir, "Blackout: Remembering the Things I Drank to Forget."

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