"Secret Erection Ballot"

Anxious voters turn to Craigslist for a casual Election Night encounter.

By Tracy Clark-Flory

Published November 5, 2008 1:10AM (EST)

People are dealing with the anxiety of this historic Election Day in different ways: Obsessively switching between the talking heads of cable news, boozing it up at the local bar and, it turns out, looking for some politically inspired punani on the "Casual Encounters" section of Craigslist.

NBC New York reports that a search "for 'McCain,' 'Obama' and 'Election' turns up scores of posts by people looking to get laid," and was kind enough to compile the greatest hits from each category. There is a "hot" woman hoping to find someone to make out with every time Obama wins a state, a McCain supporter expecting to need some consoling tonight, a middle-aged couple looking to perform an erotic "massage" while watching the election results roll in and a man searching for a horn-dog similarly turned on by voting.

My hometown of San Francisco is similarly minded, only you don't find nearly as many McCain-fueled fantasies. The headline highlights: "Election Day: Need to Release," "Anybody Down to Watch the Election News Naked?" "Secret Erection Ballot," "Horizontal Presidential Prediction" and, my favorite, "Baby, Let's Make a Baby Before Bush Do Something Crazy." And while free vibrators aren't being offered to San Francisco voters, we do have dedicated volunteers promising "free facials for female voters." Anything to get the vote out, you know?

I am seriously disappointed by the lack of double-entendres about ballot stuffing, lever pulling and hanging chads, but this provided some needed levity nonetheless. How are Broadsheeters coping with election stress?

Tracy Clark-Flory

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