Et tu, Bruce?

Some first names really aren't coming back.

Published April 1, 2009 3:57PM (EDT)

The other day in the playground, I met a toddler named David. I was like, "David? Who names their kid David?" Indeed: How long has it been since you met a tiny little Mike, or Kevin, or Steve? (OK, I did meet one young Steve, but he was a terrier.)

But no, this isn't a fish-in-barrel post about goofy yuppie/celebrity/Palin baby names that are in; rather it's about those names that are out, possibly forever. And's Robin Elise Weiss (via Strollerderby), in my humble O, gets it all wrong. Her list includes some of the primo jolie-laide (or, as I call them, Yahrzeit wall) classics -- Mildred, Herman, Norma, Norman -- which, I guarantee you, are totally back. I know two teeny Seymours. Case closed. (In fairness, Weiss also includes Dick, which ... yeah. Done.) 

Now, which names are, in fact, really out, beyond even the realm of so out they're in? I say it's the names from my childhood, not my zayde's. Like: Susan. Nancy. Judy. Jennifer! Alan. Bruce. And if they do come back in my lifetime, as "classics," then here's what you can call me: old.  

By Lynn Harris

Award-winning journalist Lynn Harris is author of the comic novel "Death by Chick Lit" and co-creator of She also writes for the New York Times, Glamour, and many others.

MORE FROM Lynn Harris

Related Topics ------------------------------------------

Broadsheet Love And Sex