I've just made a horrible discovery, one I want to share with you all: Turns out I've been living a lie. I wasn't born in the U.S., as my parents had always sworn I was, but in Kenya. In fact, my parents aren't even my parents. (Also, I'm 63 years old. That one definitely came as a surprise.)
OK, obviously none of this is true -- though I do now have some suspicions. But I was able to make it look that way just now, with a new Web site, the Kenyan Birth Certificate Generator. You just spend a minute filling out a few details, and for your effort you'll be rewarded with a fake certified copy of a Kenyan birth certificate -- just like President Obama's, which was apparently based on an Australian document.