Salon limerick contest

The week in nonsense verse

By Alex Halperin

Published February 10, 2013 3:59PM (EST)

Salon readers dig up Richard III, pay tribute to Ed Koch and more:

The Boy Scouts say it’s not okay,
To be out and a Scout if you’re gay.
But all straight molesters,
The Toms, Dicks, and Chesters,
Are welcome as flowers in May.

Mark Childress
Key West, Fla.

Edward I Koch, three times was Hizzoner,
Best of pals with Cardinal O’Connor.
When New York was a ruin,
He chirped ”How my doin’?”
And refused to call her a goner.

David Maron
New York

An entrepreneurial shyster,
bought an old carpark in Leicester.
For it seems that he'd heard,
That Richard the Third,
Was there, buried beneath an old Chrysler.

Timothy Smith

The NRA's Wayne LaPierre,
Waves his AR-15 in the air.
Claiming "guns don't kill people!
But some drug dealing creep will,
Unless we arm kids in daycare!"

Jason Ganz
Dix Hills, N.Y.

Salem Jabar, Muslim cleric and dad,
Was an anti-al Qaeda sort of a lad.
An American drone,
Blew him up, skin and bone.
Chirped Prez Obama, "Oops! My bad!"

Bob Hall
Springfield, Va.

Send entries to along with your name and hometown. The deadline is Friday at noon eastern and we’ll publish our favorites on Sunday. Poems may be edited for clarity or scansion. Good luck!

Alex Halperin

Alex Halperin is news editor at Salon. You can follow him on Twitter @alexhalperin.

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Drones Ed Koch Poetry President Barack Obama Richard Iii Salon Limerick Contest Writers And Writing