Amazon's delivery drones aren't fast enough for Stephen Colbert

The comedian proposes a revolutionary idea: a brick-and-mortar storefront


Prachi Gupta
December 3, 2013 7:38PM (UTC)

Amazon has come up with a solution to a delivery service problem that has been bothering "The Colbert Report" host Stephen Colbert all week -- possibly all year. "If I have to wait till tomorrow for my items to arrive, there goes tonight's plans to watch Monday Night Football while doing backflips on my trampoline," Colbert complains, remarking on Amazon's snail-paced one-day delivery service.

Thankfully, Amazon's CEO and "billionaire 'Busytown' worm" Jeff Bezos has offered up a solution to this non-problem problem: drones that can deliver packages 30 minutes after an order is placed.

Advertisement:

But Colbert remains unimpressed. "Flying products to our doorsteps inside of half an hour is a bold plan right out of science fiction. That leaves me with only one question: why does it take so long?"

Echoing the mantra of his fellow red-blooded Americans, Colbert exclaims, "I want my stuff now, and I know how to get it!"

"Put on your future hat, Jeff Bezos!" he continues. "Because I've cooked up an idea that will bring buying as we know it to a new level."

"Here's the idea: Amazon locations that customers can walk into ... and buy things."

The Colbert Report
Get More: Colbert Report Full Episodes,Video Archive


Prachi Gupta

Prachi Gupta is an Assistant News Editor for Salon, focusing on pop culture. Follow her on Twitter at @prachigu or email her at pgupta@salon.com.

MORE FROM Prachi GuptaFOLLOW prachiguLIKE Prachi Gupta

Related Topics ------------------------------------------

Amazon.com Delivery Drones Drones Jeff Bezos Video

BROWSE SALON.COM
COMPLETELY AD FREE,
FOR THE NEXT HOUR

Read Now, Pay Later - no upfront
registration for 1-Hour Access

Click Here
7-Day Access and Monthly
Subscriptions also available
No tracking or personal data collection
beyond name and email address

•••


Fearless journalism
in your inbox every day

Sign up for our free newsletter

• • •