Poor, poor E.L. James. The literary merit of the author's blockbuster "50 Shades of Grey" series isn't even really debated, because the writing itself is so generally maligned -- and that might be because it very well could've been produced by a computer instead of a human. Look no further than the Fifty Shades Text Generator for proof.
The project, created by engineer and Google developer advocate Lisa Wray, relies on the "Dada Engine" to turn certain rules and vocabulary into actual sentences (a completely oversimplified version of the explanation Wray offers on her FAQ page). The results are pretty spot on:
He runs his nose along my forehead, and my heart starts pounding. He kisses me, insistent, exploring, his eyes glowing with lust. His mouth is on mine, and an electric thrill thrums through me. He softly kisses my face, tasting, making me tremble. He softly kisses my cheek, and a delicious tingling shoots through me. I bite my lip, and he curls his fingers around my head, holding me gently in place as we kiss, frantically. My inner goddess glares at me.
Compare that to a section from the book:
He leans down and kisses me, his fingers still moving rhythmically inside me, his thumb circling and pressing. His other hand scoops my hair off my head and holds my head in place. His tongue mirrors the actions of his fingers, claiming me. My legs begin to stiffen as I push against his hand. He gentles his hand, so I’m brought back from the brink...
Wray's version might not have quite the same narrative arc as the original, but it seems to be the a logical take on fan fiction for a story that began as fan fiction. With the "50 Shades" movie coming out this weekend, fans of the book will surely need new erotic entertainment to fill their time.
(h/t The Daily Dot)