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I tried "Siri for sex" so you don't have to (but maybe you want to anyway)

Inviting the digital foreplay assistant (and her sexy British accent) to bed with us was a little awkward at times


Tracy Clark-Flory
March 9, 2015 3:00AM (UTC)

Men who are bad at foreplay can now be added to the annals of "there's an app for that." That's thanks to Blindfold, a company that bills itself as "your digital foreplay assistant" or "Siri for sex" -- which, OK, all new tech entities like being described as [X popular thing] for [Y]. Uber for food! Tinder for clothes! Netflix for books! And sex-tech is no exception (see: the sex selfie stick). More accurately, though, Blindfold is an audio guide for foreplay.

Each month, the company releases a new audio file that guides heterosexual couples through some pre-sex exercises that are meant to help them "explore new fantasies," "break free from routine," "improve intimacy" and "slow down." It's like a sophisticated version of naughty dice, only the directives are given, ahem, aurally. The narrator -- or erotic taskmaster -- is a woman known only as "Angelina."

Perhaps you're intrigued -- well, hold onto your knickers because it comes at a steep price: $19 ... a month. It's hard enough to get people to pay $19 a month for hardcore porn, let alone audio foreplay. This Angelina must really be something -- as in Angelina Jolie herself -- to command that price, right? Well, I decided to give it -- or her -- a try to find out, which led to the following Gchat conversatio...

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Tracy Clark-Flory

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