Here's a question: Why buy a Bluetooth vibrator -- something you can only use sometimes, when it's on hand -- when you could basically become a Bluetooth vibrator? Allow me to be more clear: Bluetooth-controlled vibrating clitoral implants are maybe going to be the next big thing in sex toys, so perhaps we should all get on board early.
Jezebel obtained an announcement from the sex toy company Fun Factory (purveyors of "Smartballs") about the medical grade silicone Bluetooth implant, Orgasmia (TM). According to the announcement, Orgasmia stimulates the inner structure of a woman's clitoris by emitting "a mild, silent vibration" that targets the whole region:
The device can be used on its own for hands-free orgasms, to enhance the experience of sex with a partner, or to address a variety of sexual complaints, including unsatisfying intercourse, extended separation from a partner, or even lack of time for sex. Even better than the long-awaited "female Viagra," Orgasmia™ gives women control over their arousal and pleasure. [...]
The motor nestles against the pelvis, and users report that they stop noticing it after only 3-4 days of use. Inspired by the design of Thermal Electric watches, the device automatically recharges using body heat. As with all Fun Factory products, Orgasmia™ is encased in medical grade silicone. While the implant can be synced to respond to remote commands from a number of electronic devices, including many smartphones, Fun Factory also offers a variety of discreet remote controls designed to look like rings, wristwatches, necklaces, and more.
The clit chip (can we call it that?) is currently only being implanted by a Beverly Hills plastic surgeon (of course) as an outpatient procedure with no small price tag; the whole thing costs $6500. It comes with a 20-year warranty for the motor, though, and Fun Factory will cover half the cost of upgrades and repairs -- so maybe it's worth it? But we're not sure who can say definitively...yet.