Twitter just lost its God damned mind over Ted #CruzSexScandal-mongering

Sure, it's enough to put you off sex forever, but it's news, and needs to be reported

By Scott Eric Kaufman
Published March 25, 2016 4:43PM (UTC)
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Ted Cruz (AP/Matt Rourke)

The National Enquirer is reporting that Texas Senator Ted Cruz has had affairs with at least five different women -- one of whom, according to its photo spread, is Donald Trump spokeswoman Katrina Pierson:

Of course, the source of these allegations would be enough to convince most political commentators to bite their tongues, but Twitter is full of political commentators for whom the description "most" simply isn't apropos, so not surprisingly, its denizens became hilariously apoplectic:


Of course, there can be truth buried in rumors:

Not that there isn't a bright side, mind you:

Scott Eric Kaufman

Scott Eric Kaufman is an assistant editor at Salon. He taught at a university, but then thought better of it. Follow him at @scottekaufman or email him at

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2016 Gop Primary Elections 2016 Extramarital Affairs Sex Ted Cruz