Let's enjoy the white supremacist freakout after DNA tests show they aren't 100 percent white

Users of a white supremacist message board are shocked to discover they're not as "pure" as they'd like to be

Published August 17, 2017 2:23PM (EDT)

 (Getty/Chip Somodevilla)
(Getty/Chip Somodevilla)

Statnews — a digital news site that focuses on medicine and science — published an article on Wednesday about white supremacists taking genetic tests to measure their whiteness. Many users on the white nationalist website Stormfront posted their results from genetic ancestry company 23andme and were unpleasantly surprised to discover that they weren't as "white" as they thought. Their reactions, as it turns out, are a thing of schadenfreudic beauty.

Here's one person worried that he or she might be a bit Jewish:

I got 100 percent European on mine, and I'm from the US and so is my whole family. The thing that DID blow my mind is that I got 18 percent Ashkenazic on the standard view and almost 21 percent on the speculative view. (They count Ashkenazic as European.) Looks like one of my grandfathers was secretly Jewish. He always said he was Russian. Welp, I guess he meant THAT kind of Russian. It's caused me to have to reassess my self-image a whole lot.

[caption id="attachment_14809734" align="alignnone" width="300"]Stormfront Screenshot Stormfront Screenshot[/caption]

In one thread titled "My 23andme genetic ancestry results," a user found that he was 99.25 percent European, 0.02 percent African and 0.73 percent Asian. In another post, a white supremacist had to reevaluate his or her skin color, asking, "Am I 'white' now?"

[caption id="attachment_14809735" align="alignnone" width="300"]Stormfront Screenshot Stormfront Screenshot[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_14809738" align="alignnone" width="300"]Stormfront Screenshot Stormfront Screenshot[/caption]

Such a small percentage of non-white really ticked off some of the white supremacists: "EVERY single American's results that I have seen ALWAYS have this 0.1% non-white garbage, and I literally mean every single one, and I've viewed hundreds," wrote one user. This has led to a quest for what might be called alternative genetic facts, or as that user put it, "results that are actually accurate and not 'rigged' the way that 23andme is for the very reason and cause of trying to spread multiculturalism and make whites think that they are racially mixed."

While some on the site were fairly confident of 23andme's accuracy, others found excuses not to believe the results they found. "Send your results to Dr. Mcdonald and he will give you your accurate results," said one.

[caption id="attachment_14809740" align="alignnone" width="300"]Stormfront Screenshot Stormfront Screenshot[/caption]

A thread titled,"Is 23andme legit?" contained many users scapegoating one group for their "ancestral flaws." One "sustaining member" of the racist site said that, of course, it's all the Jews' fault:

There's Jews at the top, that said your results would likely show some non-White ancestry because of this. The Jews want us all to think we've got some non-White DNA so we are more likely to go along with their plan. They don't want us to resist genocide by assimilation.

[caption id="attachment_14809741" align="alignnone" width="300"]Stormfront Screenshot Stormfront Screenshot[/caption]

In the same thread, a member named "headstar" wrote:

The 23andMe forum is full of of retards: They think the Holohoax happened. It is full of both white and non-white hardcore nordicists. They think Spain is in Mexico and all those mixed race immigrants are "Spanish". They stereotype Southern Europe and equate them to Arabs/Turks/non-Europeans. They refer to any white who isn't of 100% Anglo-Saxon/Northern European stock as a "mutt." They like saying "white" in sarcastic quotation marks.


Some on the message boards like "Segregationista" did not get DNA testing, but they had advice for other white nationalists who found out they had Jewish ancestry:

I've never had a DNA test, but I know where all my ancestors are from. I guess it could be amusing, though, having Jews tell me where I came from. I suppose I could use the the test results to become a citizen of Israel

[caption id="attachment_14809744" align="alignnone" width="300"]Stormfront Screenshot Stormfront Screenshot[/caption]

Looks like we've found the first victims of the white genocide.

By Michael Glassman

Michael Glassman is on Salon’s Breaking News team. You can find him on Twitter at @warnkemg

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Anti-semitic Comments Genetic Tests Message Boards Nazi Sympathizers Stormfront White Supremacists