Hay gurl hayyyy! Microsoft’s advertising team here. Can we have a little one-to-one girl talk about our latest ad? It’s for our Windows All-In-One, and we think you bitches are gonna find it totes amazeballs.
Now, I know what you’re thinking: “OMG doesn’t this have something to do with tech thingies? Snooze-a-rama! You should talk to my BF instead, he’s into that kind of thing. Blah, blah, blah, tampons, Girls, fat-free vodka, Lupita Nyong'o’s Oscar dress, etc., etc.”
We hear ya loud and clear, ladies, but we think this commercial for the Windows All-In-One will totes m’gotes change your mind. Why? ‘Cause you can use its touch screen to go on Pinterest and plan your wedding with your friends and stuff! Here, let this blandly attractive white lady explain:
As explained in our ad, unlike the Mac, the Windows All-In-One does have a touch screen, thus making it easier for you to do important lady things like plan your wedding with your friends.
“Instead of passing around a tiny tablet, the 20-inch touch screen makes it easier for my friends to check Pinterest, search for the wedding band, and share their ideas,” attractive white lady explains, whilst her other AWL friends giggle and Sara Bareilles plays in the background.
See, ladies?!?! The Windows All-In-One makes your dreams come true! Because weddings! And Pinterest! And touch screens! Ladies like touching things, right? That’s a thing ladies like to do? OK, cool. Just checking.
So in conclusion, ladies, buy the Windows All-In-One. Because as we think we amply demonstrated in the above commercial, we understand your needs and desires more than any other multi-billion dollar tech corporation does. And did we mention the touch screen? Touch screen.