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Monday, Jan 23, 2012 5:36 PM UTC

Gwyneth Paltrow: Buy my overpriced cleanse!

The increasingly out-of-touch actress invites fans to pay hundreds of dollars not to eat

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Topics: Gwyneth Paltrow, Body Wars,

Gwyneth Paltrow: Buy my overpriced cleanse!Gwyneth Paltrow needs her organic wine, and she needs it now.

Goop, she did it again. Gwyneth Paltrow, the occasional “Glee” guest star and most hated woman on the planet, has come under fire again, this time for peddling her “go-to cleanse” for “losing a few pounds and kickstarting a healthier and more energetic New Year.” The price tag for a 21-day supply of protein powder, digestive enzymes,”strong probiotics” and “liver support” that promise to “support the body’s natural detoxification process”? A very generously proportioned $425. Suddenly, deep fried stuffing looks better and better.

Does anyone else think that sounds like an awful lot of powder and pills — not to mention cold, hard cash — for a “natural” process? Especially one that features one low-calorie meal a day “from a set of foods”? Not Emmy-winner Mariska Hargitay, who says that the system “has changed my life.” Not celebrity divorcee Demi Moore, who calls it “the best!” Mmm mmm, what could be better than a “filling” 90-calorie shake composed mostly of rice protein concentrate, rice bran and rice syrup solids?

Plenty, suggests London dietician Catherine Collins, who noted in Sunday’s Daily Mail that Paltrow is “not a nutritional expert. I would not recommend it.” Also, 21 days of that stuff sounds really gross. (Goop does note that the invitation to cleanse is “not intended as medical advice” and is “just a suggestion,” thereby covering Paltrow’s toned, slender butt.)

Though Goop’s “suggestions” are historically wildly out of touch with any 99 percenter’s lifestyle and budget, the idea that someone could be fabulously well-off enough to pay exorbitant sums for the pleasure of not eating strikes may of us as especially hilarious, even for Gwynie. And though Jezebel once called Paltrow a “tone deaf… Marie Antoinette,” at least the doomed queen knew that if you’re spending money, it might as well be on the luxuriant pleasure of cake. Not a powder to promote “intestinal transit time and bowel regularity.”

Mary Elizabeth Williams

Mary Elizabeth Williams is a staff writer for Salon and the author of "Gimme Shelter: My Three Years Searching for the American Dream." Follow her on Twitter: @embeedub. More Mary Elizabeth Williams.

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