The small, sexist joke that became a big deal
A crass laundry label sets off a social media firestorm
By Mary Elizabeth WilliamsTopics: Gender Roles, Gender, Life News
There’s something odd going on inside Telegraph writer Emma Barnett’s boyfriend’s pants. She might never have discovered it had he not left his trousers on the bedroom floor this weekend, and had a peculiar message on the care instructions not caught her eye. Apparently Madhouse trouser wearers can go one of two routes in washing their pants: the old “machine wash/tumble dry” one or, as Madhouse implores dudes: “Give it to your woman – it’s her job.”
Much like J.C. Penney’s recent “Too Pretty to Do Homework” shirts or, more revoltingly, Topman’s line of rape apologist wear, the revelation that somewhere, men’s trousers are telling them to pawn off their dirty laundry on the nearest set of ovaries was not met with universal amusement. On Monday, Barnett tweeted a photo of the tag, saying she was “so shocked at this label in my boyfriend’s new trousers.”
She wasn’t the only shocked one. As the image was retweeted across the world, it was declared “horrible” and a “disgrace” by disgusted consumers. But even more horrible were the other commenters — the ones who blithely pleaded that they were “not sure what the issue is here” or told her to get back to doing the wash.
As Barnett then elaborated in her column, “If the comment had been remotely funny – I would have been the first to laugh and shrug it off … But it was the lack of any implied humour and the horrible surprise of such an incongruous message hidden away inside some trousers, that left me just plain stunned.” There’s nothing like trying to explain why a joke isn’t funny to make it even less funny, but here’s the thing – a sneaky little jibe, one that implies that every man has a woman and every woman does his laundry, isn’t a joke. It’s just a flat, dumb and, yes I’m going to say because I guess I’m just a humorless feminist, sexist comment. It’s a put-down. One that smacks of entitlement and disdain. One that says, “The man who wears these pants really wears the pants.” Which is a pretty bold boast for a cheap pair of ugly chinos, if you ask me.
Barnett said her beau purchased the pants from the discount men’s clothing store Madhouse last month. The company has since issued the statement that “The chinos in question are manufactured by a jeans brand that we stock but the care instructions on this product were not proofed by our buyers,” adding that “the wording was not instigated or ordered by Madhouse. The wording is clearly meant as a joke but now it has been pointed out to us it is something we will need to be more careful about in the future.”
In the greater scheme of things, someone’s lame idea of a funny pants label is not on par with trying to wrest away our reproductive rights or calling us whores. But if you want to know why it matters, look no further than the comments to Barnett’s own story (or, I’ll wager, in about 10 minutes, on this one). The crass “Oh, shut up.” The blowjob jokes. The surprise that the writer is neither an “idiotic teenaged girl” nor “horse-faced schoolmarm.” The exasperated “For God’s sake, grow up” and “Calm down, dear.” And the accusations, again and again, of that notoriously humorless feminism.
See, this is what we deal with. Every time women point out stereotypes and insults, when we say that we aren’t entertained by the status quo, when we call BS when it rears its head, we are inevitably met with even more and bigger of the same. We’re greeted with a hearty “Get a sense of humor” or a dismissive “What’s the big deal, sweetie?” We’re maligned and mocked, told to keep quiet and “pick your battles.” But the small battles count too. They count because every time we let them slide, we grant tacit approval to a culture of hostility. We say that a real man doesn’t respect women, and a real woman keeps her mouth shut. We tell our daughters to be quiet and pleasing and our co-workers to not make waves. We tell the bullies that they’re winning.
With a simple, disgusted tweet, Barnett said to hell with all that. She distinguished between making a joke and being a jerk. She reminded us that if you think that you can’t point out subtler forms of sexism and keep your eyes on the big battles at the same time, perhaps you’re the one who’s just not that adept at multitasking. And she proved that something as tiny as the tag in a pair of pants can speak volumes.
Mary Elizabeth Williams is a staff writer for Salon and the author of "Gimme Shelter: My Three Years Searching for the American Dream." Follow her on Twitter: @embeedub. More Mary Elizabeth Williams.
Related Stories
More Related Stories
-
What's the Eiffel Tower doing in China?
-
Top 5 investigative videos of the week: Nailing a dictator
-
Will you marry me -- once you're done peeing?
-
My crushing student debt
-
Pollution as ancient Chinese art
-
Chimp's blurry pictures to fetch six figures at auction
-
Can playing Dots on your iPhone make you smarter?
-
Print your own gardening accessories
-
The week in 10 pics
-
Temple Grandin on DSM-5: "Sounds like diagnosis by committee"
-
Stop comparing everything to "Girls"!
-
Is killing a fetus murder?
-
New DSM, new debates over ADHD and autism
-
Berlusconi's parties featured women dressed as Obama
-
Should graduation ceremonies be multi-faith?
-
Federal government is letting us eat metal shards, pink slime
-
Photographed secretly at home: Is it art?
-
Obama pledges to end "scourge" of sexual assault in the military
-
My "truly remarkable" cancer breakthrough
-
I think this guy is stalking me
-
The illusions of advertising
Featured Slide Shows
The week in 10 pics
close X- Share on Twitter
- Share on Facebook
- Thumbnails
- Fullscreen
- 1 of 11
- Previous
- Next
-
Lisa Montgomery embraces her nephew Thursday after a tornado tore apart her home in Cleburne, Texas. The twister killed six people and destroyed entire swaths of the North Texas town.
Credit: AP/LM Otero -
Jack McMahon, the defense attorney for abortion doctor Kermit Gosnell, speaks outside the Criminal Justice Center in Philadelphia Tuesday. His client was convicted of killing three babies in his clinic, and will serve multiple life sentences.
Credit: AP/Matt Rourke -
A photo taken Monday captures Vice President Joe Biden's response to a Milwaukee second-grader's innovative proposal to end America's epidemic of gun violence. This guy!
Credit: AP/Jenny Aicher -
Sen. Rand Paul, R-Ky., flanked by a grouper-eyed Michele Bachmann, addresses the IRS' admission that it targeted Tea Party groups in advance of the 2012 election. In an op-ed for CNN Thursday, the Kentucky senator slammed the president for his faux outrage.
Credit: AP/Molly Riley -
Ousted IRS chief Steven Miller is sworn in on Capitol Hill Friday. Miller testified before the House Ways and Means Committee on the extra scrutiny the agency gave conservative groups applying for tax-exempt status.
Credit: AP/J. Scott Applewhite -
Attorney General Eric Holder pauses as he testifies on Capitol Hill before the House Judiciary Committee Wednesday. Holder is under fire, among other things, for the Justice Department's gathering of phone records at the Associated Press.
Credit: AP/Carolyn Kaster -
O.J. Simpson sits during an evidentiary hearing at Clark County District Court in Las Vegas, Nev., Thursday. Simpson, who is currently serving a nine-to-33-year sentence in state prison for armed robbery and kidnapping, is using a writ of habeas corpus to seek a new trial.
Credit: AP/Las Vegas Review-Journal/Jeff Scheid -
Major Tom to ground control: On Sunday astronaut Chris Hadfield recorded the first music video from space, a cover of David Bowie's "Space Oddity."
Credit: AP/NASA/Chris Hadfield -
When it rains it pours. President Barack Obama speaks during a news conference Thursday with Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan, inexplicably inspiring an #umbrellagate Twitter meme.
Credit: AP/Jacquelyn Martin -
A smoke plume rises high above a road block at the intersection of County A and Ross Road east of Solon Springs, Wis., Tuesday. No injuries were reported, but the the wildfire caused evacuations across northwestern Wisconsin.
Credit: AP/The Duluth News-Tribune/Clint Austin -
Recent Slide Shows
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
Mobile Entertainment: 9 Amazing Drive-In Movie Theaters Still Standing
-
The week in 10 pics
-
- Share on Twitter
- Share on Facebook
- Thumbnails
- Fullscreen
- 1 of 11
- Previous
- Next
-
The week in 10 pics
-
Mobile Entertainment: 9 Amazing Drive-In Movie Theaters Still Standing
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
Netflix's April Fools' Day categories
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
Slideshow: Nerd Obama
Related Videos
Most Read
-
Revenge, ego and the corruption of Wikipedia
Andrew Leonard
-
Obstruction will ruin GOP
Jonathan Bernstein
-
Jaron Lanier: The Internet destroyed the middle class
Scott Timberg
-
Is Reddit censoring openly racist users?
Fidel Martinez, The Daily Dot
-
The man behind Abercrombie & Fitch
Benoit Denizet-Lewis
-
My "truly remarkable" cancer breakthrough
Mary Elizabeth Williams
-
We're living in an Ayn Rand economy
Paul Buchheit, AlterNet
-
When the IRS targeted liberals
Alex Seitz-Wald
-
Krist Novoselic: My plan to fix Congress, curb obstruction
Krist Novoselic
-
Cannes: The 10 hottest movies
Andrew O'Hehir
Popular on Reddit
links from salon.com

61 points62 points63 points | 3 comments

33 points34 points35 points | 1 comment
From Around the Web
Presented by Scribol
-
Alex Berg: Move Over, Gaybros: Masculine Privilege Thrives Among Queer Women Too -
Abbie Rumbach: The Confession That Blew My Daughter's Mind - Shanna B. Van Ness: Goal Set: Strive for Career Security vs. Job Security
-
Radio Host Makes Shocking Claim About Shooting Hillary Clinton -
Jennifer Lopez's Abs Continue To Amaze Us
-
Diane Gilman: Baby Boomers: A New Life-Construct -- From "Invisible to Invincible!" -
Susan Gregory Thomas: Why Divorced Boomer Moms Don't Deserve The Bad Rap -
British Nanny Offered An Annual Salary Of $200,000 -
Arianna Huffington: What I Did (and Didn't Do) On My Summer Vacation -
Vivian Diller, Ph.D.: Maybe Happiness Begins At 50




30 Places You'd Rather Be Sitting Right Now
Comments
135 Comments