Rick Santorum: Google wouldn't be this mean to Joe Biden

Candidate and sex joke still upset about what pops up when you search his name

Published September 20, 2011 7:20PM (EDT)

Rick Santorum
Rick Santorum

Rick Santorum's last name is also a word for a byproduct of anal sex. That word was coined by activist and sex columnist Dan Savage, because Rick Santorum is a repulsive bigot and it was very funny. Years later, Rick Santorum is running for president, and he is mad that Google accurately directs people searching for his name to the sex definition. Google says they can't censor search results specifically to please one random politician, but Rick Santorum knows they are really just part of the conspiracy to embarrass Rick Santorum.

Now, the Republican presidential candidate says he’s convinced Google could do something to remedy the issue, if the company wanted to.

“I suspect if something was up there like that about Joe Biden, they’d get rid of it,” Santorum said. “If you're a responsible business, you don't let things like that happen in your business that have an impact on the country.”

He continued: “To have a business allow that type of filth to be purveyed through their website or through their system is something that they say they can't handle but I suspect that's not true.”

If Rick Santorum wants to fix his "Google problem" he should consider being personally more popular and professionally more influential than the people who are making fun of him. If Joe Biden were as widely hated and as much of a complete failure as a human being and politician as Santorum, he would be similarly unable to cleanse his Google results of negative content.

But can I just ask what this means: "If you're a responsible business, you don't let things like that happen in your business that have an impact on the country.” Google is hurting the country by not censoring Rick Santorum's search results? Does Rick Santorum really think he'd be a front-runner if Dan Savage hadn't made his name a funny sex joke?

Thank God for the ongoing national humiliation of Rick Santorum, the only political story that gives me any hope for the future of this nation.


By Alex Pareene

Alex Pareene writes about politics for Salon and is the author of "The Rude Guide to Mitt." Email him at apareene@salon.com and follow him on Twitter @pareene

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